To be annoyed at the assumption that I am a Mrs?

[Cheeseandolivesplease]

So I completed a update form at the dentist for myself and my daughter; the ones they routinely hand out. It didn't ask for my title, but I ticked the "married" box.
Next thing I know, my name pings up on the screen as Mrs .
Just no!!
At the end of my appointment I went to ask for it to be corrected, but AIBU to be annoyed at the assumption?
A bit like the thread today referring to the new prime minister's wife as Mrs Burnham. She is Ms van Heel.

Fucking hell. I can't believe people actually think like this.

Your critical thinking skills are somewhat lacking.

My husband semi regularly orders something online and gets it delivered to a shop to pick up. The first time I ordered it for him and was cross with him so I gave his name as "Lord first name, Farquar-Augustus, Surname".

I didnt tell him. He did not find it funny when he picked it up and the shop assistant said "we dont get many lords here". However, now neither of us can figure out how to change Lord to Mr and remove the middle name online. He doesn't want to phone up the company and explain so he is stuck with everyone thinking that's his name.

It has given me HOURS of amusement! 🤣

And do you know what, no one has died because he doesn't have Mr at the front. In fact I'd say no one cares.

BTW- he could absolutely pass as a bumbling scruffy old money but broke type Lord.

It doesn't have to be on the current governments radar.

Yes, I think that may well happen.

I sometimes toy with using "Milady" as a title for online shopping accounts. My colleagues sometimes use it too, but NEVER Mrs.

You are being unreasonable to be annoyed.

There is nothing offensive or shameful about being or being called 'Mrs'. If you don't like it tell them you don't and ask them to put your preferred title on your file, but don't turn it into a "how very dare you" three-act opera. You will look ridiculous and everyone within earshot will be (at least in their heads) rolling their eyes.

You won't die, or even suffer serious injury by being called 'Mrs' now and then and it will happen, so try to get over it the best you can. You can't stop it happening and it's not worth getting arsey about. Just remember, no one intends to offend you by calling you "Mrs", so it's pointless to take offence.

It does always amaze me how often people don't realise that marriage is fundamentally a legal contract. By definition, if you've married someone it means you've chosen to be legally connected. That's the part of marriage that isn't a matter of opinion. It really is vital that women know this.

I absolutely don’t! why have you jumped on this when my reply was
specifically objecting to ‘ignorant people’

I have worked along side women for years never knowing their ‘marital status’
nor needed to
and women who never ever ever stop referencing their husbands, of the
“well Colin says and I agree” variety, but whether they were ms mrs miss
was of no interest whatsoever

I was not officially married until I was 30 but really did not like being addressed
or written to as Miss, at 29 I felt like a ‘spinster of this Parish’

You are wrong.

Ms is a title used by women who do not want their title to indicate their relationship status. It has absolutely nothing to do with being divorced.

You may think otherwise but you are incorrect as illustrated by many many women who are married, single, divorced, widowed etc. and choose Ms as their title.

and what people need to realise even more, is that when you are NOT married, you do not magically get the legal rights people legally married do.

Even if you believe in that mythical "free half-hour" nonsense with a lawyer

It's not a minor thing anymore ...

Men have never had to deal with this and I wish women didn't have to either.

Not from me, or my colleagues. I do judge though as I think it indicates you are educated, and appreciate the damage that was done to women in the past and is still happening due to internalised misogyny.

you are misquoting me /have not understood

Go for it!

Would it help the cause if we also discarded the marital ring on the third finger left hand. After all it appears disclosing ones marital status is so utterly demeaning.

I love being a Mrs, my marriage is so important to me, I can't stand Ms, i just don't like the sound of it and always associated it with old spinsters or divorcees. I insisted on being Miss til i became Mrs and wouldn't want to be anything else.

According to my version of the Cambridge dictionary:Ms is a title used before the family* name or full name of a woman, used to avoidsaying if she is married or not.*

In the Collins dictionary: Ms is used, especially in written English, before a woman's name when you are speaking to her or referring to her. If you use Ms, you are not specifying if the woman is married or not.

So those who use ‘Mrs’, indicate a lack of education…?

But that has nothing to do with your title. Me using Ms or Dutchess or Miladi doesn't affect my marital status in anyway.

In the same way that not having his surname doesn't affect our legal status.

Please explain then

Its in reference to the post from @stillhiding1990 saying she wants no legal connection with her husband. A lot of the rest of this is just people showing up how daft they and the people around them are, which is no great shakes really, but understanding that marriage is a legal contract is actually really important.

It is so much easier in German. Every female is Frau regardless of civil status.
I have no objection to Ms, except when people insist on writing it with a full-stop, because it is not an abbreviation of anything.
In the past I have heard people say (possibly very ignorantly) that Ms meant available...

You know some dim people then.

I totally agree. I'm married but would never refer to myself as Mrs.

Don't fucking get me started on forms that don't have a "Doctor" option.

If they use Mrs knowing the origin and history of it, then fine.

However, I think by many of the posts on this thread you can assume they are uneducated in why Mrs is antiquated and misogynistic.

Obviously I have no idea why someone irl choses to use Mrs so am only going by posts on this thread.