To be annoyed at the assumption that I am a Mrs?

[Cheeseandolivesplease]

So I completed a update form at the dentist for myself and my daughter; the ones they routinely hand out. It didn't ask for my title, but I ticked the "married" box.
Next thing I know, my name pings up on the screen as Mrs .
Just no!!
At the end of my appointment I went to ask for it to be corrected, but AIBU to be annoyed at the assumption?
A bit like the thread today referring to the new prime minister's wife as Mrs Burnham. She is Ms van Heel.

Calling yourself Mrs doesn't come with marriage. It's just a thing some married women have done sometimes, for a part of the period that humans have been practicing the custom of marriage. It's no more an innate part of the institution than having a reception.

i don’t agree that it’s rude to assume someone’s title under the circumstances you’ve described, but I think it would then be very rude if the dental surgery continued to refer to you as Mrs once you’ve corrected them. I feel strongly about things like this too and often find that I’m addressed as Ms initially, but I accept that if this is the first time I’ve been in contact with a company or individual, they will tend to use Ms if they don’t know my preference. Once I’ve made it clear that I’m a Mrs and non a Ms or Miss, then I would be very irritated if they continued to use the wrong title.

Your in-laws refer to you as Ms YourName? This is getting so outlandish I’m afraid the average person will not understand any of it.

If it is true that degree educated women are more likely to use Ms what is the problem with pointing it out?

You can’t jump on the coat tails of women who actually fought for our rights and think you moaning at your dentist appointment is anywhere near close. You can educate someone but to say you are angry and making a stand for women rights is why you have had the reaction on here you’ve had.

If your husband objected or the receptionist refused to listen or your manager/co workers were refusing to acknowledge this then I’d agree you had an issue. In this situation it’s a use your words type thing.

Ms is a title used by divorced ladies/women/people,
unless they are titled of course, RH, Lady, Rev. Dr. Princess

why would you hijack this title when you are indeed, married?

Mrs. is after all Mistress which married ladies could apply
with impunity, what fun!

I recall my father receiving mail addressed to John Smith Esq.
and my feminist mother gnashing her teeth receiving mail addressed
to Mrs. John Smith, particularly when it was from her MiL.

The evolution of marital status now makes allowance for divorced
or indeed separated females to be shown as such - you have a title,
BECAUSE you are married, this is not a dilemma.

Do you realise how privileged you are to have a dentist and able
to afford their care?

Mine call me Jane
Well they would if my name was Jane
But you get the point.

😂

Did they get it wrong after you politely pointed out the error?

I presume she means on things in the post. People of that generation sometimes still like sending cards and addressing with a title, so that seemed the likeliest explanation to me.

@Madamefroufrou My "privilege" comes through years of education, training, qualifications and hard work.

Emphasis on the hard work

I kept my maiden name and am Ms but I don’t get upset about being called Mrs. Does make me feel like my Grandma though…

what? you are straying from the path here OP 🙄

And so do you.

But 'faux naivete' is a Mumsnet stock-in-trade, to the extent that its users recognise it when they see it.

@Cheeseandolivesplease I’m still confused. I understand the incorrect use of Mrs as that’s not your title. But you said the dentist used the wrong last name and also said you, your husband and your daughter all share a last name. So you were addressed by the wrong last name but it’s not even your husband’s last name (because his is the same as yours)?

Imagine being privileged enough to have Internet access and free time to type, but not knowing that Ms is a title for married women just as it is for all women.

Unless you're on some kind of wind up, in which case have at it!

People object to having titles based on whether they are married, divorced not married in the first place. Men don't have to so why do women?. Other countries have changed the practice but it hasn't happened in the UK.

I thought the poster was joking

I can never be sure!

Is this meant to be a reasoned response?
what has this to do with locating, attending, affording a dentist?

OP you are sending us into cyclical arguments, such a time wasting exercise.

ok, thanks

Among my friendship group and their married daughters we have
A teacher, an accountant, two business owners, a senior nurse, on office manager, a physiotherapist, a psychotherapist.....All Mrs

Good grief. I think there are far more important things to worry about!

Try the Irish tax office. If you insist on being taxed as an individual with your maiden name they tag your married name on hyphenated in correspondence and change Ms to Mrs. It makes you sound like some landed gentry😂
But on the upside you always know where the letter has come from and not to open it if you are having a good day.