AIBU to challenge OUT OF CONTROL parents group chat?

[SySy7]

My 2 kids go to pretty decent school where the group chat is intertwined with class reps and PTFA. Theres around 90 parent members in each chat. My issue is not only the relentless money grab opportunities but the inconsiderate few who seem to think that messaging at 6am on Saturday mornings and sometimes gone midnight on a Friday evening to ask ridiculous stuff they could have directly asked one parent or a rep rather than 90 people is completely unacceptable? Where are peoples sense of boundaries, common sense and general respect? I’ve silenced before for holidays but all you see the minute you open your phone is 30 messages about school lunches or a fundraiser. I’m due to have a baby next week so have decided to remove myself from both chats for the time being for my own sanity but would it be unreasonable to contact the school come September and request that the group chat become more regulated? Say from 7am to 9pm on a school night for example and limited on weekends? Direct questions go to a rep? I get all parents have a morning panic from time to time for example but I’ve honestly never experience the sheer volume or anything like this before. One week we were sent the same advert for a group event over 15 times. It became literal spam and random parents were reposting the message/ad through like we hadn’t received it 45 mins ago? I’ll always help and support where I can - make donations and bake etc. I’m not against trying to make improvements but this next level. It does quieten down for holidays for a bit but always select few who just don’t give a damn! It might sound ridiculous but it actually gets me down sometimes- I feel completely and utterly harassed.i know a few other parents feel the same but nobody is brave enough to speak up or go against the status quo. There will now be incessant messaging for the entire weekend due an event taking place tomorrow (as there is most weekends). Should I be that person?

This. How old are you? My mum acts like messages are urgent. They aren’t. Read them at your leisure. Reply if you wish.

I just assume everyone has their phone on silent these days or notifications off so a midnight or 5am message doesn’t bother me

Just mute it..why would you keep volume on at midnight?

Write this message on the group chat:

Hi all. I would like to start a new group where members only message between 7am and 9pm Monday to Friday and content is strictly limited to that which is directly relevant to the goings on of class 2A. Like this comment if you’d be interested in joining. (I will be leaving this group as it’s a bit much)

😂

You don't need to archive it not to get notifications. If you've muted the chat then the only time you should see how many messages have been posted is when you open WhatsApp, and even then you can just ignore the group.

Get some help setting your phone.

Yeah archive the chat for sure. I think most people assume that kind of group chat is archived so are less worried about others feeling harassed.

Just mute them or remove yourself, you can't ask a school to regulate parent WhatsApp groups they have no control over!

You can mute individual chats.

I just refuse to do WhatsApp (anti Fb/ Zuckerberg protest!) and I suspect I’ve not missed much.

Good on you these group chats are crazy thats what emails and letters are for leave yourself out the group they can drain the life out of you.. your sanity is far more important txtn at 6am on a weekend absolutely get a grip

but who would choose who is boss of the group @SySy7

Our local WhatsApp groups ask people not to message at unsocial hours, they can always send a personal message to a friend if it's urgent.

Don't all groups have Administrators? Not a "Boss" as such but technically running the group.

Just mute the chat and don’t look it unless you need to.

yes but then its not necessarly them who moderate the groups behaviours

that one is the ideal solution

Just mute the chat, if you want a complete break archive it. Lots of people in class group chats have it on mute, it's easy to tell who they are, they reply to messages, party invites etc about once a fortnight. If you don't need the reminders etc and are pretty on it I'd just leave it archived personally.

It isn't school's job to police adult's in a whatsapp group. People will post when it is convenient for them, lots of people work shifts so they will post at odd times, if you have your phone on silent at night as most people do messages at weird times have 0 impact.

The problem with that is you have to find someone who agrees with you enough to ask, when unwilling to do it yourself, and also there needs to be some attempt to enforce any requests. Otherwise people will continue to do whatever they like.

It's actually quite a significant ask of other people, particularly if they've shown no signs they agree with you. I'm an admin of a parents what's app, much smaller than OPs though, and I would not be impressed if someone thought I ought to do this. If it's that ideal a solution, OP can have the baby and then organise and provide the labour for this herself (no pun intended).

but then youll get others who then say why is messages at x time etc

In our school the class reps set up the WhatsApp groups for each class and then moderate them. There is no year group WhatsApp which surely isn’t needed anyway? I used to try and read them but there are just too many so tune it all out now - I agree it can get really over the top.

Why? Is nobody in the group young enough to figure out how to turn on Do Not Disturb?

Well I'm with you OP! Sounds a nightmare
It's completely ridiculous to have a group chat with 90 people in it. If this is a key communication channel for the school then YES they are involved and do have to set out some clear principles on what such groups are for and expectations around how they are used.
Surely one chat per class, managed by the class rep(s), is enough. With a separate chat group between the PTA and the class reps so that messages are cascaded down. The school needn't police any chat on a day to day basis, but they do need to set out some basic principles at the outset.

There's nothing to suggest this group is a key communication channel for the school though.

But let's assume they were. There's also no basis to presume the people currently providing volunteer labour to the PTA in a way that suits them are going to be fine with turning into what's app group managers, to benefit people who refuse to use their settings properly.

People are being unreasonable to overuse it and you are not being unreasonable to feel annoyed.

But the fact you find it difficult to cope with receiving non urgent WhatsApps that don’t require any action on your part could be a sign that you are overwhelmed.

You would be unreasonable to complain or ask for it to be policed.

Just mute it like a normal persona and open at your own convenience.

Do you really think bits possible for people with full time jobs, morning and evening care responsibilities AND the extra tasks of volunteering should really be thinking about your preferred business hours because you can't mute, ignore or archive?