AIBU to suggest my husband takes the box room when we move?

[Bedroomdilemmas]

Aibu to give the smallest bedroom to my husband? We’re moving house. It’s for 2 years. My husband and I have separate bedrooms because of his snoring. The new house has 3 double rooms and one box room. Our two children really want a double room each and to be far they’re 18 and 17 and will be hanging out in their bedrooms the majority of time. My husband literally only sleeps in his bedroom, while I spend loads of time working in my bedroom. It seems obvious to me that he should get the box room but he won’t hear of it. I instigated the move so he’s not thrilled in general.

Can’t you take it in turns to sleep in the smallest room?
We still co sleep with our smallest child once he wakes in the night and comes up, we take it in turns to sleep in the smallest room so we each get an undisturbed nights sleep.
In your shoes I would have one double for you/him so both of your things are in there, one room each for your children and just a bed, bedside table and small tv on the wall in the smallest room and use it between you purely for sleeping in.
Im not sure I’d like to be sent to the smallest room all the time and expected to use it as my space.

The house isn't suitable. You need 4 decent sized rooms.

Assuming your DH contributes to the mortgage and family life, I'd also be annoyed at being a grown adult sleeping in a tiny bedroom while everyone else has their space. Of course I would if there was no alternative and it was best for the family, but I still wouldn't be happy!!

Out of interest, why are you moving house for 2 years, for your work?

I think you have a joint double marital bedroom, and a “sleep room” in the box room that you take turns going in.

People saying sort his snoring out what do you expect him to do? My husband snores, he has tried every strip, spray, mouth guard, special pillow, mouth tape, tennis Ball in the back pocket solution, he has had sleep studies - no apnea. He was diagnosed as a common snorer. He's fit, healthy, not overweight, doesn't drink other than rare occasion like at a wedding or something. There is literally nothing else he can do. The doctor said it's just the way his body is built. Now I get the impact I live with it, but there are comments that make it seem like snoring is something simply fixed with a bit of effort. It isn't.

As for the room it depends OP, I tend to decamp to our spare room when the snoring gets too much for me, but it's not my room, the main bedroom has all of my things in and it's mainly where I start the night unless I know I have to get up particularly early, if DH is out and coming home late he'll go in there so as not to wake me. Maybe the solution is the box room is the spare and whoever needs to moves there on the nights it's necessary. Also one tried every earplugs going and I've found pixel buds 2a with some kind of white noise playing are the best thing to block it out

Share the big one and alternate sleeping in the small one

I like this! I’ll run this by him

Especially not if I was jointly paying the mortgage and was already not happy about moving.

We sleep separately so the big room houses both our clothes etc and the other room is just for sleeping normally (and my craft stuff) so the big room is still shared.

We’re renting this new house. I’m paying the rent. We own our old house and he can keep a room in our old house for work purposes. It’s just for two years as this suits our children’s schooling and it suits me because I hate the old location.

So you are funding 2 houses at the same time? Why does it help schooling?

Sounds like this needs a proper grown up conversation! Not you telling him he’s having the box room! I assume DH is contributing to the cost of the house move and mortgage so why should he get relegated to the box room over the teens who I’m assuming aren’t contributing? This attitude where children are held in higher esteem that the parents is absolutely ridiculous!!

Run that past me again.
You think that paying for and running two unsuitable houses is better than finding one suitable one?

We’re renting rooms out in the old house to pay the rent of the new house. The mortgage is paid in the old house. We’re renting the new house in a location that we all love. My dh isn’t very into the move as he loves the old house but we all agree that the location of the new house is much better. It’s just for 2 years as it suits the kids schooling and gives us time to make a more permanent solution. The bedrooms are the problem.

I think that is very unreasonable!

So you decide the move now dictate he gets the smallest room and are now whinging he wont just do what you order?

If the bedrooms are unsuitable then it's not the right house to rent, surely?

Why can the OP not have the box room if the non-contributing children are being allowed their choice of rooms?

We’re renting rooms out in the old house
You do know that you can't evict tenants at will any more, don't you?

I think its perfectly reasonable to allocate space as it makes most sense. My dp has the smaller room at his house because all he does in it is sleep and dress. His adult son has the bigger room because he chooses not to hang out downstairs and it's essentially a bedsit with shared bathroom and kitchen. Its not about who is the adult or who pays the bills. I offered my dd my room as she's now also at the 'hanging out upstairs' stage but she declined. She's now not allowed to moan about having no space though.

Renting for school catchments?

It’s just for 2 years as it suits the kids schooling
If all this is for their benefit (I see no benefit to the DH) then one of them can have the box room!

Why does it help schooling?
Go on have a guess!!

No I’m not “renting for school catchments” we’re not in the UK so thankfully that doesn’t apply here @ConfusedSoShutUp .

I am paying for this, not my dh @olympicsrock

You said it was being paid by renting out your other house?

If they are effectively lodgers then they won’t have any rights, but to do this they’ll have to have one officially still living at the old house and one at the new house. Dodgy territory though if found out.