AIBU to confront workmen about stealing my engagement ring?

[Marooney]

TLDR- workmen are only people who could have taken my engagement ring, do I confront them?

Need some urgent advice please-

We’ve had 2 workmen here for several days repairing the patio. They don’t need access to the house and come in and out the side passage which leads directly to the garden from outside. One of the men has done several jobs with/for DP over the years, let’s call him Bob, the other guy is an assistant DP doesn’t know.

On Monday night DP left my new engagement ring in its box on a table near the front door as he was going to take it to have a small adjustment done, however on Tuesday morning he forgot and on Wednesday noticed it wasn’t there. He assumed I’d taken it but I hadn’t and there’s no one else in the house, no cleaner or visitors, no one. We live in a rural area and I haven’t always been locking the front door when I pop out on errands as the builders are around - I never thought they themselves might be a risk- and it’s a cul-de-sac so no one passes by except one middle aged neighbour who we’re friendly with, walking her dog. Our Ring doorbell has not recorded any stranger entering our front gate.

We don’t know what to do. Obviously we can’t accuse with no proof, but it seems clear that one of them has taken it. My only idea so far is to have a word with Bob, ask him a bit about the other guy and how long he’s known him etc then say a ring has gone missing and we’d rather sort it out now than look through days of Ring camera footage (we have cameras but unfortunately not in that area, but he doesn’t need to know that). That way at least we’d be implying to Bob that we don’t think it’s him. Incidentally, DP hasn’t categorically said that it couldn’t be Bob.

Any suggestions gratefully received!

I’m leaning towards that possibility yes :( The camera missed a chunk of the afternoon

You need a better camera and/or better wifi. And cameras at the back and in the house, all over in fact, just in case something else goes missing, tradies around or not. 😊

That’s a good point! I’ve ruled out him going in through the living room as it makes more sense from the front and I’ve realised the camera unfortunately missed a chunk of the afternoon so he could easily have entered. But Bob was so convinced and convincing that it couldn’t be him.

Definitely the St Anthony type approaches, with faith. I seem to have lost a really nice ring a few years ago as can't find it, haven't seen it for ages. I think I most likely put it on the bedside table and it got swept up with tissues or something. Was only steel but I liked it and can't find another the same, still hoping it'll turn up somewhere.
I'm dying to know that happened to the ring being discussed!

DH is right handed then.

So if he picked up a ring from the ledge he would likely put it in his right pocket. And that pocket is hidden.

Also no van keys.

Can we assume the keys are kept on the same shelf ? Pick up keys and ring with same hand and put in right hand pocket ?. Gets into van, leans over to pull keys out, and ring box falls down by gearstick ?

And to be really OTT I suppose, does he adjust his driving seat position in the morning V night ? Many people do, because our size changes through the day. It's something I often do. Move seat a few cm, ring falls out into that gap.

Unless he does not lock the van.

You’re right, I’ve already bought more. Is the WiFi the reason for the missing chunks of time?

My bloke lost the signet ring he was given for his 21st. We searched high and low for it and gave up. It turned up months later in the bottom of his golf bag.

Depends on the type you have. Some continue recording, some don't.

And it's the door nearest the street..?

Might the builder/builder's mate have had a visitor or visitors at any time? Either social or something to do with the job?

But mine didn’t record my leaving or returning from an errand, it didn’t pick up the movement and start recording, is this due to weak signal? If so we’ll need to remedy that as clearly the recording feature is only needed if someone is there!

Definitely not, we live miles away from anywhere, they travelled in on a motorbike around 45 mins every day

Firstly, please may we all send up prayers to St Anthony.

Secondly, I'd like to know if it's sheer obstinance or genuine misunderstanding that a lot of you have when dealing with the OP and the OP's replies? Are you intent on not reading, or reading wrongly, or reading in things that just aren't there?

OP, I would move on - don't bother answering any questions from those who just want to wind you up. You have been very clear in the point of your OP and your explanations since.

I hope it turns up - it IS super weird the way things go missing and then just come back. I hope someone hasn't stolen it, that's sad. I would ask the police for advice and they will take you through it - they might have it sat in their evidence locker looking for a home for it.

Save all else, make your claim.

My 3 year old was an insane climber and he threw away (In the fucking bin) a stack (engagement ring, full eternity and two half-ternity rings) all diamond and gorgeous...I just thought "they'll turn up" until I was bathing him two weeks after I noticed they weren't where I thought they were and he said something like "and then I threw the rings in the bin".

I never got them back, obvs.

But gorgeous replacements on insurance. I've been insured to the hilt ever since!

I’ve watched the video again, his key was in his left hand, it’s just the one key not a bunch. As I’ve said in other posts he doesn’t put anything in his pockets apart from receipts as it’s uncomfortable to drive and the van is a few steps away from the door so no need to put it away. The van is always locked yes. He doesn’t adjust the seat, I’ve never heard of that 😆 We’ve searched the van thoroughly but we really don’t think the ring was ever in it. He remembered soon after leaving that he didn’t have it. You are a thorough detective though!

Thank you for this and I’m so sorry about your rings - plural 😩 That’s awful and you couldn’t even punish the culprit 😆

People on here are making me wonder how they interact in real life conversations; is their comprehension at this level or is it a textual thing?!

Or, being British, the OP set it up with her preferred date and time format....

@Pherian must be American and not realise that the US format is only used in the US, Belize and Micronesia…

Of course it's not 'rubbish!' It is rubbish that only Brits vape though. Laughable that you'd even think that.

National Instutue for Health and Action on Smoking and Health

Vaping is a massive global phenomenon. While the UK has one of the world's highest vaping rates, millions of people use e-cigarettes across the globe.

Vaping is a Global Trend

The Americas: In the US, millions of adults use e-cigarettes regularly. In Latin American countries, despite strict local bans, vaping remains highly prevalent.

Europe: Millions across mainland Europe—particularly in countries like France, Germany, and Poland—regularly use vapes.

Asia & Oceania: Vaping is widespread in China (one of the world's largest manufacturers and consumers of vapes), and remains popular in Australia and New Zealand.

At least check your facts before saying what people are posting is 'rubbish!'

My son did something similar, though thankfully not with something valuable. Husband lost the stylus thing for his tablet...searched for ages over several days, never found it, and gave up. Months later it was mentioned again, and our son, aged around 5, said "it's not on top of the cupboards in the kitchen!" Well, it WAS on top of the cupboard, and could only have got there if it was thrown up there...😆

This. Make them aware that you’ve discovered it’s missing and hope that it will magically reappear if there’s a chance they’ll be caught out on CCTV.

And annoyingly, inconsistently in Canada. Causes me quite a lot of confusion!

I think the point was he would have left evidence of having entered the house

That’s absurd!

The job is finished and we’re well past that point!

A friend selling her house had an open day. Her husband left an expensive watch in a drawer that was easily accessible. When they returned to their house that evening he couldn’t find the watch, so he reported it to the EA then to the police. Insurance company paid out. When they were packing to move months later he found the watch. My friend had decided that her DH hadn’t hidden it well enough so she did and had totally forgotten.

OP, you either say something or you stay on here arguing with a bunch of strangers.

🤣🤣🤣