Backstory. My parents and my sister live in the same town. I live 40 miles away. My parents moved abroad years ago which is when I met my DH and moved from our hometown. Parents moved back to our hometown where Dsis still lives.
I try to go “home” in the holidays, depending on work and child commitments. Parents and dsis can travel but rarely come to ours as it’s easier for just my family to travel.
It was my sisters birthday this weekend, we arranged to go for a pub lunch yesterday, it’s about 10 miles from where my family live and 30 miles for us. Arranged to meet early as the pub wasn’t taking reservations. We got there for 11.45. Was very quiet and my parents were already there. My sister etc were still making their way but said to go ahead and sort a table. There were 12 of us. My mum suggested two garden shed style booths, as it’s so hot and sunny so we’d have some shade. The pub garden was still empty so me and my lot went to the loo. When I came out my 2 girls were sat in one booth and my parents in another, I said why are you sat there and not with Nana as they hadn’t seen her in a few months. They said they were but she told them to sit in the other booth. If this was for saving the table purposes , the garden was still empty.
I suggested we moved and got a row of bench tables with parasols as the shed things were quite stuffy and we wouldn’t be able to chat. We did this and moved, I went to sit up the end where my mum was and she said to me “why are you moving up here, where’s your sister and gkids going to sit? Down that end?” So I moved back down the other end. Felt a bit miffed, firstly sister wasn’t even close yet, and I thought we could have chatted.
When sis arrived we said hello etc and her and her family were sat up one end with my parents, and me and mine down the end. Mum went to the bar with sis and I thought they were just getting drinks but hadn’t noticed they were also ordering food together. So then I hurried my lot up with what they wanted and ordered. Our meals came out half way through my parents and my sister etc, as there was the delay in us ordering. No one had said otherwise I’d have ordered all together. At this point my elder girl said “what was the point in us coming”. Which made me quite sad for her but I said not to worry. We did some activities together after the meal and it was very clear we were almost hangers on.
My girls were talking in the car on the way home and said how Nana didn’t really talk much to them, how they didn’t see their cousins as the activities my parents were doing with them whilst me and DH did with ours. My sister messaged last night saying sorry we didn’t get to chat much, but nothing from my mum. I can’t help but think I must have upset her in some way, as even before my sister arrived she wasn’t interested in me or my girls. I’m really upset about it, it was helpful that my sister acknowledged that we didn’t chat. I just don’t know what to do. DH says just ignore and see how next time goes but he’s very laid back and doesn’t like fuss. Obviously I also have the issue that my girls are a bit miffed by it all too.