Partner lying in bed on hottest day of the year …would you be annoyed ?

[luluxxx]

My partner works 6 days of the week
He never gets bank holidays off except today .
Anyway Saturday night we went to a gig that I really wanted to go too ,we left before the main act came on as he had a sore throat.
Yesterdag was a football game,he was up and seemed to be fine ,out for 10 hours.
Today he won’t get out of bed
Says he can’t be bothered because of his sore throat.
Its 29 degrees here
We had plans to go to car boot sale or beach.
Anyway I have left him to it and came out to the park with my book.
Would you be annoyed ?
I feel a bit sad as I’m sat by myself and everyone here with partners etc .

I'd be more pissed off at leaving an event but him being fine for the football!

Leave him to suffer with his man cold, enjoy your day.

Sounds like he’s feeling well enough to do the things he wants to do, just not the things you want to do. Is that a common pattern? I mean in general does he prioritise himself and not care about what you want? Or do you think he’s genuinely not feeling well?

i think you need to let him rest. He's not 100% and heat this hot can make you feel worse. We had had plans to do some gardening today but its just too hot so I'm laid on my bed. We've agreed to try at 4pm/5pm when its cooler!

If you want to go out can you not do this without him? It's his day off too.

I think it’s madness to go out in this heat. And especially if you’re ill. I went to the garden centre early today because it needed to be done. But I’m planning to lie down for a few hours. We’ll be up and doing things tonight and we’re having a BBQ and kids will be outside playing. But right now everyone in their rooms with curtains drawn.

No, I would rather be reading by myself in peace than with hordes on a beach on a Bank Holiday Monday. The car boot also sounds hellish on a day like today.

He works six days a week, I wouldn’t begrudge him a day in bed.

I would be annoyed about leaving the concert early because he said he wasn’t well but then him managing to stay out for 10 hours the next day.

It's his day off - he can do what he likes.
I usually avoid going out on Bank Holidays, just to dodge the traffic, but what was stopping you from going to the beach or car boot sale on your own? You're not joined at the hip - my husband has been out since 8am today.

I guess we all like different things

We hardly get any sunshine like this so I like to make the most of it.
It was just annoying as he was fine yesterday at the match but today he’s on deaths door again

His behaviour over the gig was dickish (why didn’t you stay on your own though?) but I wouldn’t be going anywhere in this heat if I didn’t have to - least of all the beach or a car boot - it sounds like he’ll.

I’m currently in the shade in the garden with a bowl of snacks and a book. I’m only going out later because I need to for work.

@Miranda65we never get bank holidays together and we had planned this one for weeks to spend doing something together …if the match was today he would be out no bother

He's being a selfish twat. The heat didn't bother him when it came to football did it? I'm glad you have gone out but why didn't you go to the beach or boot sale if that's what you really wanted to do ?

Just clicked in this thread to make sure it wasn’t about me 😂

No pleasure in being out and about for the sake of it in 33 degrees. I’m laying on my bed with a fan. Just leave him be

YANBU to be fed up that he wanted to leave the gig but went to the football

YABU to resent him staying in bed when he gets very few rest days and has a sore throat

YABU not to have headed to the beach on your own, if that's where you wanted to go.

YASSB (stark staring bonkers) to have wanted to go to a car boot sale on a day like this!

But he does sound selfish, in general.

I didn’t go to the beach because I was planning on getting in the water but don’t like leaving my valuables alone so the park was the second best choice.

Yeah I’d be really pissed off about leaving the gig early, then he’s fine to be out all day for what he wants to do, but then can’t get out of bed today.
But reading a book and sunbathing sounds like the dream. So I’d make the most of that.

Yeah I’d be annoyed he only seems to be ill when it’s not something he’s chosen to do, leave him to miss out on the sun, enjoy your day.

It depends on whether or not you had made plans together, or just assumed he was going to spend the day with you.

We are all home today
I was going to do a bbq later but the kids aren’t enjoying the heat so I’ll cook inside and do some salads etc..
my kids are in the lounge, blinds shut with a fan on playing as they just don’t tolerate the heat and I’m not a huge fan either - my partner and I are sorting stuff out and I’d love to be lying down!

Spending the day solo, reading in the park enjoy the sunshine in peace is my idea of heaven!

Is this a relationship you really want to be in op? You’ve said it yourself - given the chance to do something with his mates - he’ll take it, given the chance to do something with you - he’ll lie in bed. That can’t make you feel very good. I would really advise absolutely everyone to learn to love being alone, it gives you so much freedom to leave relationships that don’t make you happy.

Him being fine for football but not other plans is suspect!

Why didn’t you stay alone to watch the main act at the music thing?

You can get a waterproof pouch for your stuff. Or just leave all the valuables at home, and tuck the car key into your bathing suit, fastened with a small carabiner.
I sometimes vacation on my own and still want to go swimming, so that's what I would do (although I also often just leave my stuff on my towel and hope for the best. Or ask a friendly looking fellow sunbather to keep an eye on my stuff. Would depend on which beach though)

And mine!

It’s what billions of people choose to do on holiday after all