Sister has inherited huge wealth. Help

[Hidinginthelootoo]

My sister has inherited huge wealth... multi millions. Through sad circumstances.
Myself, my younger sister and our parents are all struggling money wise, due to poor pay (work two jobs to try to help), sister is divorce, parents just pensioners. I am trying so hard to be happy for her as she spends spends spends, one day she spent £300k! I try to oo and aa over what she buys, but I'm dying inside and drowning at home. Please help me be more positive, or explain nicely how it's making me feel without ruining our relationship.

Assuming it’s from the sister’s partner/partners family rather than within their and OP’s own.

This happened with my sister.

She had shares in a company that were acquired and she became a multimillionaire overnight.

With is came epic obnoxiousness and entitlement like I've never seen. She keeps inviting me to holiday on her boat or in her Spanish property but you couldn't pay me to go. She spent 15k on a motorcycle even though she hasn't ever ridden one or expressed interest in one. I challenged her and she said "it's all relative, when you have millions 15k is nothing".

It has utterly changed her and her behaviour is so intolerable that I just hardly ever see her anymore.

I am not anticipating ever coming into any money, but on the rare occasion that I purchase a lottery ticket, I will fantasize about what I would do if I win the money. My fantasy always includes paying off my brother and sister-in-law's mortgage, paying off my best friend's mortgage, putting money in trust for my kids and my nieces and nephew.

Obviously it would depend on the amount, but for context the current Mega Millions jackpot in the US is $843 million.

Spouse i expect

You could say, so sis are you going to do something nice for mum and dad?

I think that’s a perfectly acceptable question to ask your sister. It may make her realise she’s not being very thoughtful.

Get a grip sis, you couldn't stand Dave anyway.

If the inheritance is due to her husband dying, honestly I think you need to cut her a bit of slack for being self absorbed.
Also, if im going to be totally honest, it would depend on why my family were struggling for money on if id give them any. I wouldnt give a financially reckless sibling any money, nor would I give any to parents who had been stingy as hell their entire lives or had favoured siblings over me. Not saying thats the case here, but its not always as cut and dried.

Well isn't she a charmer.

Edited: ah yes a spouse would be a difficult thing.

Me too. It always includes making sure my siblings and their families are sorted. (Not that I do the lottery much, got fed up with never winning 😭).

It sounds like she’s going to blow through it all and fast. Has she already helped you? There has to be a stopping point if she has but it’s also not her responsibility if you’re struggling.

You need to warn your sister that 'Rachel's gonna get her' unless she is more discrete.

Obviously the right thing to do would be to give it all to the Cats Protection.

OMG, that's so obnoxious it's funny. I wouldn't know where to start coming out with rubbish like that even if I won all the money in the world. I'm not surprised you don't see her often.

You just explain in simple, plain, honest terms, you don’t need to fluff this up.
Sister, I’m really happy for you that you have money to live comfortably now. But please be sensitive to the fact that I don’t have any money and live in poverty. I’m always here for you if you need me, but I don’t need to hear about each and every purchase.

Or she won the lottery

What is the background here? It’s highly relevant. You say sad circumstances. Did her husband die? A tragic accident? Life insurance?

Because if any of the above or similar. You just come across as a grasping greedy person. She’s going through a terrible time and all you’re thinking of is her cash, and how you are entitled to some apparently. Dreadful.

It’s more a comment on old money vs new money

She said sad circumstance

Hard to judge without knowing the circumstances and how recently this has happened. If her partner has been killed in hideous circumstances and she has been awarded a huge payout I think you might need to cut her some slack before moaning about how little you all have.

I do exactly the same every time I buy a Euromillions ticket! Helping out my brother and his family, friends who are less well off, big amounts to specific, small charities I support, etc.

I think being blunt is the only thing you can be:
’dsis, is there anyone else you can show these things off to? Not that I am begrudging you treating yourself but it is very difficult to fathom your spendings as I am really struggling. Please can we talk about things anything other than your purchases? Thanks. X’

Money often goes to the thoughtless selfish types.

Anything you say or do will just be interpreted by her as jealousy.

She sounds unpleasant. She can’t be that sad if she’s splashing the cash like it’s water.

Leave her to it.

And the title says ‘inherited’ so probably not a lottery win.

Unless on property, 300k in a day is insane. She needs to rein it in before it dries up. She also clearly lacks self awareness knowing you’re all poor and not giving you all a few thousand.

I need to know what the £300k got her.

Wow, the money won't last long at this rate. Let's hope the stuff she's buying has a decent resale value. She might need some of it back in a couple of years.