It appears that you have chosen a vengeful and vindictive god. I suggest that you look for one who is more tolerant and forgiving. The Jewish, Christian and Muslim ones are all the same God, although, strangely, the old men who write down what he wants say different things, even in the subdivisions and sects inside each religion.
For some reason, each God seems to want the same things that his old men like and are familiar with, whether it is the clothes you wear, the food you eat, or what you do with your sex parts. It's almost as if the word of god is actually the word of assorted old men, who don't agree with each other.
I find myself drawn to the mysteries of Mythras, because that will give me the right to go to any part of the world within 500 miles of where a Roman once pitched a tent thousands of years ago, and to seize or destroy any house, farm, village or town, and dispossess the occupants, expel them, and kill any that object. If anyone complains, I will tell them God said so. If any resist, I will call them terrorists and exterminate their families. I understand this is widely considered acceptable.