Anyone else hate the expectation to shave down there?

[BearDownThere]

Is anyone else fed up of the expectation/strong preference for going completely shave pubic hair? I’m female and have only had male partners, but prepared to believe women have this expectation too if others have experienced it. I mean each to their own, but personally I find it feels child-like. Has anyone managed to find a compromise with their partner on this?

YABU- It’s nice to do things for your partner

YANBU-my hair my choice

Not understanding the connections here at all?

I've Immac'd it of a few times but when it grew back it was rashy and itchy so I gave up. I now Immac the bits on show when wearing a swimsuit and trim to keep it tidy but that's it.

I felt an expectation to shave in my twenties but that was down to my own insecurities wanting to please at any cost. Now in my forties I would feel ridiculous shaving down there. I'm a woman, not a ten year old girl. I do shave what's spilling out on the thighs though but that's a personal preference. I would be disgusted if a man asked me to shave, suspecting him if having an attraction to preadolescent girls 🤢

I'd like to laser off the hair on my legs, armpits and bikini line. It's so tiresome dealing with it on a regular basis.

I think it has been much the norm since early 2000s unless I have lived in another universe. From glimpses more after my gym classes I would say that being bare or mostly bare is probably the majority but maybe because that encompasses very much the 20-50 group.

I would agree that 50s is more " to hell with it" 😂😂

I know mumsnet loves/hates class chat but... there's a class divide on this topic IME 😬

I was just thinking the same thing!

I disagree. I’m not saying that people are wearing hairy hot pants but being hairless is not the norm. It’s really only the much younger group that seem to do it.

most others seem to have a neatly trimmed area of hair.

I did it once, didn’t bother after that. Men can expect what they want, they can like it or not, I don’t care.

I have a full bush and much eye rolling when I go on swimsuit type holidays where I do my annual tidy.

I don't give a monkeys but DH prefers it trimmed, not shaved. So now he has the lovely job of doing it for me! 😂

Sounds like you had a crap waxer! Mine is very thorough and very professional. It costs £30 every 5-6 weeks. I take paracetamol just before although it’s habit more than anything as it doesn’t hurt.

I have never felt pressure - and if I did it would indicate this was not the relationship for me. I am not a porn star, I am a natural adult woman and insist on total respect. I wouldn’t shave or even consider anything beyond a very tidy neat trim.

We are not blow up dolls.
Men do not get to call the shots on our intimate areas. We need to set some standards for the younger generation as well as making choices in our best interests. Whatever they are.

I’ve always said no way are my pubes getting shaved, or worse waxed 😖, and I’m sticking to that!

I am all off, front to back. I have always struggled with my hormones and being naturally very dark haired was a recipe for disaster down there!
I bought an epillator almost 10 years ago and have done legs, muff and armpits with it ever since. No itchy regrowth, no shaving rash and no dark roots under my skin.
I would never go back to being hairy down below, it feels so much nicer and the skin issue I suffered with for a very long time has completely gone.

Which epilator? And is it horribly painful?

Yep, same here.

But I do see what you mean, OP: it's p0rnographic bs, very paedo if you ask me. I hate to think there's preassure to do it.

I've shaved mine off a couple of times and hated it as I thought it looked childish.

Also the insane itching when it starts to grow back was worth never doing it again.

I trim it and shave a bit at the top and sides but probably only once every 2-3 weeks unless it's summer and I'm in swimwear.

I shave my armpits ONLY when I’m going for a spa day/swimming/beach as I don’t generally wear short sleeve stuff. This is only due to social expectations.

My partner (male) doesn’t expect me to shave down there and neither should he. I used to do it in my teens and twenties and spent the entire time itchy and miserable when it grew back - who wants to be having to sneakily scratch when out and about?!

The reason people are saying that there are paedophile vibes to shaving is simply because it replicates pre puberty.

So is anyone who shaves anything a paedo?

I’ve never shaved mine off, and never will. If a man is expecting it, that gives me paedo vibes.

In my case Ive been trimming my 'bush' long before the internet crowd or I was sexually active and as woman knocking on the door of 50, long before internet porn was a thing. I hate hair down there, always have. I've had it permenantly removed as I hated the shaving rashes and getting it waxed was a faff. My DH definitely prefers it this way and I also prefer him groomed. Oral while gagging on pubes isn't my vibe.

No plucked chicken skin here, having been lasered the skin is silky smooth. And if you imagine my foof looks prepubesent after 3 kids and thats where your mind goes I think thats a you issue.

This outrage than women dare remove their pubic hair and its only to please men is astounding. FulI bush, half bush, no bush, I applaud any woman who has their body how 'THEY' want it and cant understand anyone whos offended by someones elses pubic hair choices

Never felt pressured by partner or society. I've done it maybe twice.

If you want to fine, but doing it for anyone else, nope! This discussion just reminds me of John Ruskin and his expectations. Me, I am not hairy anywhere, so little if anything to bother with, other than care with a bikini line, but like so much in a woman's life, it is your body, your choice in my book.