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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Who is BU, me or my stupid bastard prick of a printer?

144 replies

DingsBum · 25/04/2023 07:01

Jeez. One job. It has one job but somehow acts like it's massively put upon when called on to perform Angry

Current issue: apparently it's got no colour ink. The colour ink light is flashing and obviously this means it cannot print anything at all ever.

a) it's got colour ink, I can see from the bloody app that the colour ink cartridge is 68% full

b) I don't even want to print in colour, just black and sodding white

c) it ORDERS ITS OWN INK so if there really is no colour ink then whose fault is that anyway, hmmmmm?? Not mine, you stupid HP arsewipe. This is most definitely a you problem

d) it has got fucking colour ink

Anyway in short, does a sub-£100 wireless printer exist, that just prints what you want it to when you want it to without throwing a massive shit fit on a regular basis? Why so compli

OP posts:
Original poster
DingsBum · 25/04/2023 07:02

FFS posted too soon.

Why so complicated that last sentence should say!!

OP posts:
CheeseCakeSunflowers · 25/04/2023 07:03

Oh dear it looks like your ink ran out before you finished your post.

PineappleLatte · 25/04/2023 07:03

Is there an option in the settings to clean the print heads?

Ink dries and that‘ll stop it working. I recently bought a black and white laser ‘cos I never print colour enough to keep it flowing.

GrunkleStan · 25/04/2023 07:04

It's also more likely to happen the less time you have / the more important the document.

I feel your pain.

MargotDeWitt · 25/04/2023 07:04

I thought your title had a typo.

But definitely, LTB

halfthesun · 25/04/2023 07:04

You are me!!! Bloody drives me mad ... you did make me smile so thank you Grin

Lockdownlard · 25/04/2023 07:04

I gave up on colour printers and went black and white laser, no problems since - I use a cartridge recycling service to get refills. Don’t miss colour printer at all - the colour printing was shite anyway.

LadyHag · 25/04/2023 07:05

😂

I feel your pain op. My printer is contributing to the printer apocalypse by refusing to print anything and making a huge juddering clanky performance when being shown paper. It runs a dictatorship of forcing me to potter down to the library to print of anything I need.

CaptainMyCaptain · 25/04/2023 07:05

Mine sometimes refuses to work for some spurious reason then, half an hour later, works perfectly.

Original poster
DingsBum · 25/04/2023 07:09

LadyHag · 25/04/2023 07:05

😂

I feel your pain op. My printer is contributing to the printer apocalypse by refusing to print anything and making a huge juddering clanky performance when being shown paper. It runs a dictatorship of forcing me to potter down to the library to print of anything I need.

The printer apocalypse!!! Yes!!! Mountains of printers that just get chucked out because they've got one small yet unfixable fault...

I just don't get it. Why so shit????

OP posts:
DoubleHelix79 · 25/04/2023 07:10

B&W laser all the way - deals much better with being unused for periods of time.

(Also: set the bastard thing on fire)

MushMonster · 25/04/2023 07:13

PineappleLatte · 25/04/2023 07:03

Is there an option in the settings to clean the print heads?

Ink dries and that‘ll stop it working. I recently bought a black and white laser ‘cos I never print colour enough to keep it flowing.

Yes, it sounds like it needs some TLC. Just take the cartridge out and put it back again, it may work.

DrManhattan · 25/04/2023 07:14

It's always the printer

AlphaAlpha · 25/04/2023 07:16

Reminds of this this, probably my favourite ever YouTube video

dogglebox · 25/04/2023 07:17

When you send something to the printer you can select black and white on your computer/phone...

Original poster
DingsBum · 25/04/2023 07:17

MushMonster · 25/04/2023 07:13

Yes, it sounds like it needs some TLC. Just take the cartridge out and put it back again, it may work.

Show quote history

Done that. Done everything in the online troubleshooting guide. Still insists there's no colour ink. In fact the problem is now worse because the cartridge is now "not communicating" with the app Confused

OP posts:
Remona · 25/04/2023 07:18

I would never buy another HP product. They are absolutely shite.

I have an HP supposedly wireless laser printer. I gave up trying to print wirelessly a long time ago. The hours and hours I spent trying to sort it out when it just decided to stop working for no apparent reason. I used to have to uninstall and reinstall, download drivers, change ports etc. whenever it decided to throw a wobbly. Used to take me hours and a load of stress every time trying to get it working again.

I eventually decided I couldn’t be arsed with that and I either threw it through the nearest window or I connected it with a cable. It does rather defeat the object of having a wireless printer though.

They seem to have a mind of their own and HP support/their website is nigh on useless.

CaptainMyCaptain · 25/04/2023 07:19

Mine frequently tells me to connect to the WiFi when it already is.

Original poster
DingsBum · 25/04/2023 07:20

CaptainMyCaptain · 25/04/2023 07:19

Mine frequently tells me to connect to the WiFi when it already is.

Don't even get me started on what happened when we got a new router and had to connect the printer to a new wifi network Shock

OP posts:
Whochangedmynamec · 25/04/2023 07:22

In short- no. They all do this and the hours spent changing cartridges, fixing paper jams etc are not worth the effort. I have given up.

HotelNotPortofino · 25/04/2023 07:23

You are showing fear

you wither need an IT person to give it ‘the look’

or you tell it that you didn’t want the bloody printout, don’t care, and it will print a dozen for you

NamelessNancy · 25/04/2023 07:23

I hear you. We got through so many stupid cartridge printers and the cost of refilling the things is exorbitant. Have an Epson ecotank now which has reservoirs for liquid ink. It's so much better. I've managed to live with it without wanting to throw it out of an upstairs window for five years now. I think we've needed to top the black tank up a couple of times now but can't have spent more than £20 on ink. The printer itself was a bit more expensive but paid for itself in ink and ink-based frustration in no time. It does quibble about the network occasionally but you can't have everything!

Soonthen · 25/04/2023 07:27

Well how would you feel being shouted at this early for not ‘getting going’ quickly 🙄

you need to whisper sweet nothings to it - I LOVE your slinky little ribbon, that toner suits your eyes, ohhh those buttons

it’s all about printer love. I act up in the face of rage too 😬

Shortpoet · 25/04/2023 07:29

Oh god I knew you were going to say HP. I bought one 3 months ago. Tried to print at weekend and print was coming out striped.

1 hour on phone with HP trouble shooting. They concluded there was no ink left ( so why didn’t it order itself done if it was so smart?)

According to HP, if you haven’t printed anything for a couple of days you have to print a test page to keep the ink flowing.

Really do not want to spend my life printing test pages for a printer 2 or 3 times a week.

Replaced ink. Printing still striped.

BruceAndNosh · 25/04/2023 07:29

My printer works perfectly as long as long as the print job is unimportant.
Urgent print jobs are a different matter.
How does it know?