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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To object to having to call a man accused of rape 'she' in a criminal court trial?

378 replies

Appalonia · 19/01/2023 22:50

Firstly, the definition of rape is penetration by a penis without consent. Only men have a penis. This case makes a mockery of the law and the criminal justice process and is a gross victimisation of this victim?
www.clydebankpost.co.uk/news/23259685.clydebank-court-hears-woman-raped-clydebank-home/?ref=twtrec

OP posts:
Thread gallery
9
Yazo · 19/01/2023 23:05

Someone is a rapist and you object to their choice of pronoun?!

I kind of think there is a stronger objection here!

YouSetTheTone · 19/01/2023 23:09

I can’t get my head around the legal double-think here. As you say the definition of rape is penetration with a penis without consent. It is biologically impossible for a woman to have a penis, so the use of ‘she’ for a rapist is not only a humiliating lie for the victim in court, but is utterly inaccurate legally.
Surely it also means the crime is recorded as a ‘female crime’- thus lowering the number of crimes perpetrated by men against women and reducing the argument that women need single sex spaces etc.
It is truly frightening how misogynist the times we live in now is. Having to call rapists ‘she’ because they demand it. Collaborating in such an extraordinary and degrading lie.
These are not female crimes.

Glorianna · 19/01/2023 23:09

Yazo · 19/01/2023 23:05

Someone is a rapist and you object to their choice of pronoun?!

I kind of think there is a stronger objection here!

Wow just wow, that’s what you took from the OP? Did you miss where she said ‘This case makes a mockery of the law and the criminal justice process and is a gross victimisation of this victim?’

WallaceinAnderland · 19/01/2023 23:12

You are sworn in and have to tell the truth but them you are forced to lie. Ridiculous isn't it.

Notjusta · 19/01/2023 23:15

YANBU

TangledWebOfDeception · 19/01/2023 23:15

I long ago decided that this is one hill I would definitely die on. I absolutely will not be compelled to outright lie to spare the feelings of a rapist/sexual criminal. I’d rather be jailed.

BreastedBoobilyToTheStairs · 19/01/2023 23:16

I kind of think there is a stronger objection here!

Like putting the already traumatised victim through more trauma in a courtroom by forcing them to buy into an ideology and go against what they know to be true in order to make the man that raped them feel better?

TangledWebOfDeception · 19/01/2023 23:16

lie in court*

YouSetTheTone · 19/01/2023 23:17

How the ever-loving FUCK does someone vote YABU to that?!

Whoever it was - you’d genuinely, hand on heart, be absolutely A-OK with standing up in court, looking your rapist in the eye and referring to him as ‘she’ or ‘her’?

CampervanKween · 19/01/2023 23:18

I dont get it. They're forcing you to lie in court. It's humiliating and infuriating. I hate the world at the moment, it's a shambles.

Emmamoo89 · 19/01/2023 23:19

YANBU

growgrowinggrown · 19/01/2023 23:23

I totally agree that it is unacceptable, but what can be done about it?

Is there a movement/action/petition on this matter that someone can point me in the direction of?

Should we be writing to MPs?

It just feels so relentless and like a long hard slog, like it's all designed to wear us down so we just give in and accept our lot in life and I'm so fed up with it all.

Babdoc · 19/01/2023 23:25

As a Christian I’d have a major problem with swearing on the Bible to tell the truth and then deliberately lying by calling a man a woman.
As an autistic I can’t do lies deliberately anyway - it goes against my logical thinking. Even trying to make a polite white lie to spare someone’s feelings is so stilted that it doesn’t work.
As a woman - and a traumatised rape victim, confronted by one’s attacker in a courtroom - it would be absolutely impossible. And beyond barbaric that anybody would dream of inflicting that on her.

XenoBitch · 19/01/2023 23:25

YANBU
A penis is needed to rape. Only a man can have a penis. Rapist gets convicted and goes into a women's prison. It is ridiculous.

fuggyatmosphere · 19/01/2023 23:26

Barbaric & ridiculous yes

WallaceinAnderland · 19/01/2023 23:26

TangledWebOfDeception · 19/01/2023 23:15

I long ago decided that this is one hill I would definitely die on. I absolutely will not be compelled to outright lie to spare the feelings of a rapist/sexual criminal. I’d rather be jailed.

You would be fined for being in contempt of court. If you didn't pay the fine, you could be sentenced to prison but that would be for non payment of fine.

I think I would ask the judge to clarify that he is asking me to lie on oath. Just so that there was a record of it somewhere. I might also develop a speech impediment and say S..He a few times just to annoy them.

nothingcomestonothing · 19/01/2023 23:35

YANBU. If any women are unclear about how little we matter, here it is.

Appalonia · 19/01/2023 23:36

There was a case a few years ago where a woman was assaulted by a 6 foot 4 trans identified man. She refused to use she pronouns in court and consequently was denied criminal injuries compensation. If you were a rape victim in a case like this and refused to comply with this, you would be losing approx £11k in compensation...

OP posts:
stbrandonsboat · 19/01/2023 23:39

Every part of society hates women.

ErrolTheDragon · 19/01/2023 23:46

Having read the report, it looks like at least the victim was allowed to still use the man’s name rather than his new name, and male pronouns. But presumably the judge and court officials played out the ‘let’s pretend someone accused of rape is a woman’ farce.

whynotwhatknot · 19/01/2023 23:49

i'lljoin you all -its a fucking joke

donquixotedelamancha · 19/01/2023 23:53

As you say the definition of rape is penetration with a penis without consent. It is biologically impossible for a woman to have a penis, so the use of ‘she’ for a rapist is not only a humiliating lie for the victim in court, but is utterly inaccurate legally.

Not any more. Over the last few years dozens of 'women' have been convicted of rape. As you say, the law has not changed but the people applying it, in courts and the prision service, have decided to simply behave as if self ID has become law.

Sep200024 · 19/01/2023 23:54

WallaceinAnderland · 19/01/2023 23:12

You are sworn in and have to tell the truth but them you are forced to lie. Ridiculous isn't it.

Anybody know what the legal position is if you were to make this case verbally whilst on the stand?

”…..having just sworn an oath to speak the truth, can I clarify that you are now asking me to refer to somebody I know to be male, as a female?”

Rainbowbaby13 · 19/01/2023 23:54

This has blown my mind the world is in an awful mess. That poor woman probably had to find all the strength she had to go to court in the first place to face her attacker only for it to essentially be made a joke

I hope the judge and any one else involved using "she" to describe a rapist feel utterly disgusted with themselves

Rainbowbaby13 · 19/01/2023 23:56

@Sep200024 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 definitely the correct response