In thinking my manager is hugely insensitive for wearing these things into work?

[Mandarinthyme]

Our department head is very young and glamorous and is fairly new to the company. We know her salary range as it was stated alongside the job advert (a six figure salary whilst the rest of the team are lucky to earn a quarter of that). Every day she swans in to the office like she’s dressed for the catwalk, different designer handbags (the very obvious types - think Gucci, LV etc), Rolex watch, Cartier bracelets, designer belts and shoes. Not to mention the perfect nails, hair and everything else that we just cannot afford these days.

Meanwhile our large team is underpaid and overworked. The recent financial climate means many of us are struggling to heat our homes, worrying about mortgage/rental price hikes and generally having to really cut back. We are all office based and this is something we talk about frequently in conversation, so she’s completely aware of this. She’s previously had the cheek to say that we are all feeling the pinch given the financial situation, which is an absolute insult when she rubs her wealth in our faces 5 days a week.

AIBU in feeling completely incensed by this and wondering how on earth she can think it’s appropriate?! The whole team are upset with this and considering raising it with HR.

suggest reading my post again. Clearly everyone is missing the point entirely. The whole team are upset so I’m not the only one with this opinion

Noone is missing tne point, which us your entire team have been bitching about your manager. I hope she goes to HR about the lot of you.

I’ve been denied a pay rise the same year my boss employed a personal driver for his Bentley. You’re focusing on the wrong thing - this isn’t about how much your boss earns, it’s about how little you and your colleagues are earning when there’s clearly money around for you to be paid more. Lobby for higher pay for you and your colleagues, don’t focus on dragging someone else down to your level.

How about using your energy to get better pay and conditions? You complain about pp not ‘getting’ your point, but don’t you get the message from that, they’re all out of step except you. Your complaints sound more like, ‘if I can’t have nice things, no one should’ and it’s the kind of attitude that keeps the Torys in power.

Pinkyflamingo, speak for yourself

Good for her!

This

What would you expect HR to do about this?

Actually, gossiping and malicious talk is a form of bullying and harassment so maybe they could have a formal conversation with you about your behaviour.

This makes me glad I no longer work in HR. Maybe she is an insensitive dick. Companies are full of them. Reigning them in constantly would be like full time whack-a-mole. It’s not HRs job to give her wardrobe advice. We have more important things to do.

Anyone else waiting for the thread in employment issues

"I work in HR. A bunch of loons have come to me, complaining that their boss wears nice clothes. How am I going to tell them to go away?"

If the whole team feel like this, then the whole team need to grow up. If she is able to make the whole team feel inferior/upset by wearing expensive clothes, they all need to change their outlook on life. It isn't a competition, there will always be someone wasting their money on expensive trash.

I think yab a little u. Although it’s not fair, just because you earn less than her doesn’t mean she has to wear the same things as you. But I do get that it’s a bit frustrating

And I think you are missing the point of the responses so maybe should read them again. Nobody, including HR, will care about your opinions on what she wears to work. They might care about a team that have nothing better to do than gossip about their managers clothes, and they might think that this is mobbing and you all end up on a disciplinary.

We have staff using food banks and a manager who recently had plastic surgery (sorry, I mean a very relaxing holiday) and wears flashy designer stuff.

The manager can come accross as crass BUT why shouldn't she enjoy the money she earns?

Sometimes the green eyed monster in me comes out. I don't know how to stop that but at least I recognise it. Thing is, that jealousy makes me feel even worse.

I haven't read the full thread but have judged the general tone!

I feel for you OP and I get it. One of our Directors choose the day that we all got letters explaining there simply wasn't the money there to give any of us a pay rise to drive his new Ferrari in. It's not like we weren't aware he eared loads more than us, but pulling that into the Car park did feel like a "fuck you"

Another director had a BMW he used for work - we all knew he has a Aston Martin at home, but he didn't feel the need to parade it under our noses - I think that’s the difference here a lot of people are missing.

Unfortunately although I do get why you're upset - I think the others in the thread are right and you can't do anything but suck it or look elsewhere!

Omg I can't be the only one hoping OP does actually manage to rile up her colleagues to go spew their jealous complaints to HR, and then those colleagues turn on OP accusing her of creating a hostile workplace environment 😂

In this economy OP, I'd be very careful putting yourself out there ar work in such a negative light. She is still your manager. Your jealousy that she is younger and better qualified is your problem.

Haha I posted the exact same thing. That would be hilarious.

I swear as a young attractive woman in the work space women like OP are just so tedious to deal with. I hope the manager really comes down hard on them, micro managing writing them/OP up for mistakes. Bet she's keeping a tally aswell

Whoops, pressed send to soon.

...Other people also see it but at worse we'll have a collective eye roll as another pile of designer gear arrives and then get on with our work. We certainly don't sit and bitch about how she spends her money.

Your workplace doesn't sound very nice and I'd genuinely be worried about what they all say about me behind my back.

Why pay in aibu when you won't accept that you are? Instead you throw a strop and leave the thread 🙄

Pay = post

This is all so freaking weird! Having worked in an environment where our managers earned big bucks (and yes we too could have worked towards that point at some point if we wanted (sales)) it’s ridiculous. It’s the way of the world isn’t it, I mean what do you want to say to her? She has the freedom to spend her money on what she wants and to wear what she wants!!

Come off it. I agree that the OP is BU, but enough with the wide-eyed faux innocence. You sound like one of those Tory MPs who can't for the life of them understand why poor people don't just go out and get a better paid job. You really think that someone on, I don't know, 30k a year can just jump straight to a 6 figure salary??

Ostentatious displays of wealth have always been tacky though. I can see why you might be envious of her wage but she clearly hasn’t got great style.
Theres nothing cool about wearing obvious labels, so just focus on the fact she’s a bit naff and buck up.

Yep.
Our headteacher has loads of really nice coats. I've got one.
I didn't realize I was supposed to round up the hounds and go to the LEA for her being insensitive.

From the language used in the first post by the OP "swans in" etc, it's clear that however much she claims not to be a bully, her behaviour and that of her colleagues says otherwise.

You are being absolutely ridiculous OP. Any one of you with the appropriate qualifications and experience could have applied for that job. Who are you to Police what she wears? Also, even if she didn’t have that six figure salary, she could still be independently wealthy for all you know and could still come in wearing those things even on a £40k salary.

You’re being utterly ridiculous and sound quite bitter and entitled.