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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Sharing bed sheets, is it me?

254 replies

MakeMineALarge1 · 06/03/2022 19:07

Ok I really don't know if I am being weird here, but I have my sheets on my bed that I share with my husband and my daughter has hers that she shares with her boyfriend.
I bought myself some new bedding last week, I have used it once, washed it etc and now she has put it on her bed!
I don't know why but it makes me uneasy, obviously its washed between uses etc, I can't verbalise it but if makes me uncomfortable.

OP posts:
ChoiceMummy · 06/03/2022 20:00

@MakeMineALarge1

Ok I really don't know if I am being weird here, but I have my sheets on my bed that I share with my husband and my daughter has hers that she shares with her boyfriend. I bought myself some new bedding last week, I have used it once, washed it etc and now she has put it on her bed! I don't know why but it makes me uneasy, obviously its washed between uses etc, I can't verbalise it but if makes me uncomfortable.
No different to hotel sheets is it?
grapewines · 06/03/2022 20:01

What do you do when you have guests over? Do you ‘happily share’ your bedding then?

I don't know about OP, but I have sheets in a different colour for guests.

I wouldn't be happy either. It's OK to have sheets that are yours.

Original poster
MakeMineALarge1 · 06/03/2022 20:02

@TravellingFrom we haven't had overnight guests for ages, but I think I'd buy new.

OP posts:
Original poster
MakeMineALarge1 · 06/03/2022 20:04

Yes it gives me a funny feeling, but it's also the fact she just takes what she wants. My coats, shoes, bags etc.
I'm sorry you're 24 start buying your own stuff

OP posts:
Original poster
MakeMineALarge1 · 06/03/2022 20:05

Re hotel sheets, they aren't making my mine. They belong to the hotel.

OP posts:
Sparklingbrook · 06/03/2022 20:06

@MakeMineALarge1

Yes it gives me a funny feeling, but it's also the fact she just takes what she wants. My coats, shoes, bags etc. I'm sorry you're 24 start buying your own stuff
Ah, so it's not just about the sheets. That makes more sense. Just put your stuff away where she can't find it. Or alternatively tell her she can't have any of it.
mizzo · 06/03/2022 20:07

The sharing bedding wouldn't bother me. All my DC have double beds and I don't keep track of whose fitted sheets is whose unless it has a particular pattern or colour, I know who the duvet covers belong to though.

Pinching my new bedding would really annoy me though.

unimagine · 06/03/2022 20:07

100%

Doesn't matter if they're new, expensive, whatever the reason, bedding is personal. Regardless of them being washed.

Im shocked at the people that are sarcastically commenting as if its not a big deal. In that case why don't you just share knickers if we are applying the same logic of "they've been washed".

Major ick. Maybe she doesn't see it that way which is fine, explain this once and it shouldn't happen again. If it does then that is her not respecting your wishes which she is clearly old enough to given she has a boyfriend. Also yes to removing them from her bed, set clear boundaries.

Sparklingbrook · 06/03/2022 20:08

@MakeMineALarge1

Re hotel sheets, they aren't making my mine. They belong to the hotel.
It's not the fact that others have used sheets you are lying on that bothers you? It's because you paid for them and you don't want her nicking your stuff? It's about your DD more than anything else?
Carriecakes80 · 06/03/2022 20:09

My machine washes things really well, I don't care what sheet I have on me bed as long as I have one! lol

Sparklingbrook · 06/03/2022 20:10

Im shocked at the people that are sarcastically commenting as if its not a big deal. In that case why don't you just share knickers if we are applying the same logic of "they've been washed".

I don't have DDs but I don't see how wearing a pair of washed knickers that belonged to my Mum would hurt me in any way.

Norgie · 06/03/2022 20:10

I wouldn't be bothered that she'd slept with her partner on them.
I'd be furious that she'd taken MY new bedding without so much as asking.

Ourlady · 06/03/2022 20:10

I would be really annoyed about her taking your stuff whatever it was.
Time to get tough and tell her no more….also say the thing upthread about you and her dad shagging on those sheets…just for the shock factor😂

Original poster
MakeMineALarge1 · 06/03/2022 20:11

@Sparklingbrook yes this is as much about her just taking of mine what she wants
It does make me feel uneasy about sharing bedding, but it's the taking I'm just as annoyed with.

OP posts:
Sparklingbrook · 06/03/2022 20:12

[quote MakeMineALarge1]@Sparklingbrook yes this is as much about her just taking of mine what she wants
It does make me feel uneasy about sharing bedding, but it's the taking I'm just as annoyed with.[/quote]
It's time to start hiding your stuff away and/or having words probably.

Notsureabouttomorrow · 06/03/2022 20:12

Oh dear!

Original poster
MakeMineALarge1 · 06/03/2022 20:12

I can't hide the bedding, it's all in one cupboard.

OP posts:
lateral · 06/03/2022 20:13

you don’t want to be having sex on the sheets that DD may have had sex with her boyfriend on. I totally get it.

Do people actually think about this?

We just have sheets that get washed and put away in the linen cupboard, I have no idea what h have been used on what beds.

Original poster
MakeMineALarge1 · 06/03/2022 20:13

@Sparklingbrook I have words often!!!!

OP posts:
Sparklingbrook · 06/03/2022 20:14

[quote MakeMineALarge1]@Sparklingbrook I have words often!!!![/quote]
Hiding your stuff away it is then...

Blossomtoes · 06/03/2022 20:15

I’m so glad I missed getting the “ick” gene. The only thing that would bother me is her purloining my stuff.

RumJerrySailorRum · 06/03/2022 20:16

Hmm, I think I'd have a problem with it, simply because I buy decent expensive bedding.

Hell, I'm not entirely happy that my DH sleeps on my bedding right next to me😂

Life is to short for shit bedding.

When I lived at home, I had bedding just for my room. Although sheets would get mixed up I suppose. There were 5 beds to change, 2 double, 3 singles. Mum had loads of sheets.

kittensinthekitchen · 06/03/2022 20:19

Surely if you've slept on it one night, it was due for incineration anyway?

LittleBearPad · 06/03/2022 20:19

No! Bedding is personal. Given she keeps taking your things maybe it’s time she found her own place.

CarrieHughes · 06/03/2022 20:22

Shocked at the number of parents who can't discipline their children.. this is the second thread tonight.
YABU to have the ick. Go into her room and take it off the bed.
If she keeps taking your stuff make sure there are penalties.

It's not just because you're her mum. If a housemate of mine (which she is, as an adult!) took my stuff I'd retaliate in kind.

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