To not make the cake DS wants?

[GingerLiberalFeminist]

I don't want to make the cake my DS(6 next week) has wanted for ages.

This is a little lighthearted but still! There's a bit of a back story so please bear with!

Back when covid hit, my friend(39) moved in with our family (DH, DS then 7 and DS then 4) so she wouldn't be on her own. She pays us rent and is very much part of the family. She also brought her two cats, let's call them Darcy and Freya.

I've never had cats before and I adore them. However, sadly Darcy was quite old and his back started to go. Last Aug friend made the decision to have him put down as he was suffering a lot. We got the full pet experience 😔

DS5 was particularly upset, as you would be. We had lots of conversations about how Darcy was in the clouds and happy now and not suffering. Normal grief processing We thought.

However around Sept, DS5 got into his head for his birthday he wanted a cake with with a picture of Darcy in the clouds.

Despite us resolutely not mentioning Darcy to try and dissuade him, DS's birthday is next week and the subject has arisen again. Darcy on a cloud is what he wants for his cake.

If you've made it thus far thank you! Please let me know, am I being unreasonable to not make this rather macabre cake for my DS? 🤣🤣🤣

@ThinWomansBrain

make the cake - maybe let your friend know in advance, but depending on your cake decorating skills, likely to be a generic cat anyway?

Having Darcy on the cake would mean cutting through him or someone having to eat him.
we had a rabbit jelly mould when I was growing up. None of us would eat rabbit's bottom.

This is a good point. Can you get someone to make you a cake topper in the shape of Darcy the cat? Then it can be lifted off when the cake is cut.

What would you say to a grownup who did this? “DSis, 39, wants her dead cat on the Bday cake for her 40th”.

You could say the same, but in child friendly terms. Explain what is suitable for grieving and what is suitable for birthdays.

This is training for life.

For heaven's sake, the poor child is not yet six. What''s suitable for him would not be remotely appropriate for a 40 year old. I'm puzzled as why you think it would be, and why you link the two together in the same post. Why did you do this (genuine question)?

Of course, as is normal, I expect the DP will gradually introduce different concepts of death to her DS, and he will come to query/undertstand/accept them. Before he is an adult, I expect, as is normal.

OP hasn't been back since the first post. Maybe she didn't want to hear that yes she should make him the cake..

Oh wow thank you so much for all the responses!

I do want to reiterate we do find the idea of the dead cat cake very funny, but also terribly sweet!

My friend is highly amused by it, rather than sad.

We are investigating different cloud cakes. As his birthday is a weekday next week we will give it to him when it is just family to mitigate the issues it may create at a full party

Thank you again for all the responses!

Oh and I will totally post a picture!

Just do a coloured cake with some white clouds cut out and a cat figurine! Job done

@User76745333

I let ds2 (14) decorate DHs 50th birthday cake and set him loose on all the various cake toppers/decorations.

Dh ended up with a cake sporting 20 green army men fighting a triceratops..

This sounds awesome!

My friend and I have ordered a variety of cake toppers and icing to do some practice tabbies this weekend

Picture of the darling Darcy attached, sleeping on DS's bed.

He is still very adamant this is the cake he wants 😄

Darcey in the cloud cake sounds delightful. I will wait to see a picture of it uploaded.

Darcy was beautiful. Sorry for doubting that you'd come back!

I’m so pleased you are doing a Darcey cake!
Your sweet little boy will be very happy.

Lovely cat. Please upload photo of the cake when it's made.

Love this thread.

Awww thank you for that. He'll be thrilled im sure

The dead cat cake is under construction after a trip to hobbycraft. Expect pictures soon!

🐈 Yay!!! 🐈‍⬛

Brilliant!

Waiting to see the dead cat cake...... I do hope pictures were taken before it was eaten!

Great! Please do post a picture when it is ready. 😎

I'm so glad you're doing a Darcey in the clouds cake! Can't wait to see it

Looking forward to pictures!

@GingerLiberalFeminist not sure if you have made the cake already but mini marshmallows make wonderful (and easy) clouds when added together on a blue icing cake and then darcey can be added.
Wishing your ds a happy birthday

We are not sure it is the best my friend and I can do, but DS6 is delighted

awwwwww that's very cute @GingerLiberalFeminist