AIBU to not want a hairdresser to massage my head?

[Whatamess582]

I go to the hair dresser to have my hair washed cut blowdried and occasionally coloured. By a trained professional.

I go to a trained masseuse for a massage

WHYYYYY does almost every hairdresser (or training assistant…. or whoever washes my hair) now have to massage my head, without asking, when they are conditioning my hair? And why is it up to me to say ‘please don’t’ when they start…. Or to preempt it when I don’t know for absolute certain that they are going to do it and feel really awkward? I really dislike telling people I don’t like what they are doing. Couldn’t they just ask?? Like opt in instead of opt out?

I dislike it so much. The sensation, the noise of my wet hair being massaged… urrrrgh! I don’t ask for it. I don’t think they are trained in it. It’s not pleasant in any way.

Am I the only one who thinks this?

YANBU!!! It doesn't matter if other people like it - I don't, and I tell them pretty bloody quickly if they start without asking. I mean, some people like hot chocolate with extra cream and sprinkles, doesn't mean you can just empty the can of squirty cream into someone's mouth and tip the sprinkles in after it. Wouldn't you ask first?

I mean what next? Maybe madam would like a foot massage while waiting for the stylist? Of course! No need to ask first! How about a shag up the arse with a styling wand? All perfectly normal! If she doesn’t like it she can just say.

Yeah I hate it too. So I ask my hairdresser not to do it and she doesn’t.

Very similar post on here the other week and I agreed with her. I hate it. Feels weirdly intimate.

Totally agree op I find it very unpleasant. Don't like the sinks either, my hairdtessrr knows to complete the wash ASAP.

I hate it, so I politely tell them in advance not to do it.

YABU. Only reason I go to the hairdresser. I can wash my hair myself and like my hair long. But the massage.....mmmmm

I love the massage! Best part. Some are better than others but never had a bad one. I am always asked though.

The vast majority of people love it and are disappointed if its cut short, also they are absolutely definitely trained in it, it’s actually rude of you to presume they aren’t simply because you have no idea of exactly what their training involves and therefore feel they shouldn’t.

Jesus, just say to your hairdresser when then start washing not to do it. Why is that so hard.

But it's the best part!

@mygenericusername

My hairdresser comes to my house because I can’t stand the salon experience. I wash my foils out in the kitchen sink.

I’ve stopped having facials as -a face massage is suddenly included.

I’ve been in the beauty trade almost 20 years. Facials have always included a facial massage.

Some salons offer an express facial (30ish minutes) which sometimes cuts the massage out.

@ChocolateChipBelvitaSoftBake

Hate it, also hate the wash and the blow dry. I just want my hair cut, that's it. I hunted high and low for a salon that did dry/wet cuts before I found one that I stuck with until lockdown. They've closed down now. Almost all others its either the whole shaboodle or nowt.

Have you tried a mobile hairdresser? I have one, I wash my hair before she arrives, she cuts it wet and then I dry it after she's gone

I love it - I could let someone massage my head for hours! The only thing is I HATE the backwash thingy!

But I'm sure they're used to people not liking it and aren't offended if you say you don't want a massage. Just say no massage thanks, no biggie (I'm sure the juniors would rather not be massaging some random persons head!)

I hate it so much

My hairdresser knows I love it. I have been known to fall asleep when she is massaging my head!

Oh I absolutely love it. Bonus points if the conditioner is especially cold or the hairdresser has long nails. The salon I go to does a longer head massage if you book a conditioning treatment alongside your service and its enough to get me every time.

But def YANBU since you don't like it. Maybe set a wee reminder on your phone for yourself next appointment to flag that you don't like it!

YANBU I dislike it. Never know whether to close my eyes, but then it seems like I'm enjoying it too much, or just stare blankly at the ceiling.

Bethany7 I totally agree with you . If I could pay someone to play with my hair like you i would pay love having my head massage stop

I used to find out so awkward. Like... Do I close my eyes? Stare at the ceiling.

I declined once when I was asked and the stylist was very surprised i said no.

Now I just deal with it and go with the flow. It's easier this way. In the last few years I have started to enjoy it.
Just close my eyes and imagine I am elsewhere for a minute or so!

It is utterly vile. I wish my hairdresser would allow me to wash my own hair. I once had a hairdresser clean my ears.CLEAN MY EARS… 20 years later I am still traumatised,

Maybe you'd get a better massage if you offered your professional a nice bit of steak

It’s to relive stress, migraine, and lower blood pressure but it also stimulates blood flow to help circulation to your head and neck and promote hair growth.

I quite like it, but they don't do It properly.

@Bethany7

I love it so much! However I totally see your point and they should ask. I know my mum doesn't like it either.

On a separate note, perhaps I need go start a thread on this (?!) but I love having my hair played with and genuinely wish I could pay someone to play with my hair! I know that will sound weird to many. I have had a head massage a couple of times but it's not the same as having your hair played with. Unfortunately my little girl gets bored v quickly when playing with my hair!

I miss dd being little and playing hairdressers. Bit painful sometimes mind.

Urgh, I hate, hate, hate it. I hate the feeling, I hate the nails near my scalp, urgh. I started getting dry cuts to avoid it but loads of places won't do then. My current place doesn't do scalp massages and it is so less unpleasant!