To lock the jackass in (parking thread)

[BlueEyesWhiteDragon]

I live in a rural location which is very popular with walkers / bikers / horse riders etc. It's heaving today for some unknown reason as the weather is rubbish!

We have 2 driveways. One which was with the original cottage then a small bit of garden then a second which leads to the additional land we have. The second driveway the forestry commission have a ROW over as the track continues up into the forest. Next to that driveway is a footpath. Both driveways have gates at either end and both say private property/dogs running loose. (Diagram attached - not to scale!)

I have just had a straw delivery and so opened the second driveway gates to let the farmer in and trundled round the back to show him where to put them. He's unloaded and driven off and I've gone to lock the gates back up. Literally as he's driven off and I'm walking down a guy has pulled in the gates and parked up and 3 kids have jumped out and he started unloading their bikes.

I politely ask him to move as he's on private land and he says there are no signs he thought it was a parking spot. I say they are on the gate and it's clearly an enclosed piece of land that is not a parking space and he says he couldn't see them as the gates were open but he'll only be a few minutes. No problem, I say, I'll pop back and shut the gates in 5. Off I toddle.

I have returned and his car is still there and he has gone. He has left a note on the windscreen which says "had to park here no other spaces". I mean WTF?!

WIBU to shut the gates, padlock the fucker in, block the gates with my truck AND then disappear for at least 48 hours?

[Howshouldibehave]

WIBU to shut the gates, padlock the fucker in, block the gates with my truck AND then disappear for at least 48 hours?

Definitely not! What have you done?

[Somethingsnappy]

I'm joining purely to read the outcome.

Go, team Blue eyes!

[Faevern]

Please block him in, I love that the parking threads are back, I’ve missed them.

[Bellend101]

Do it. Or call a tow company.

[NeverDropYourMooncup]

@sqirrelfriends

I'd leave a note on his car saying. "Sorry, I had to lock the gates and go out"

Secretly I would be available as he had kids with him but I'd make him sweat a bit first.

'Sorry, had to lock the gates after your 'five minutes' was up as I'm going on holiday for a fortnight. See you on 14th August.'

[CakeandGo]

Is it just me that thinks some of those trees look like a cock and balls?

[Whattheduck]

Such entitled behavior on his part definitely block him in

[Needapoodle]

Definitely block it in with a note saying you had to park there no other spaces

[5475878237NC]

Wow she had a picnic in your garden?!

[CastAColdEye]

.

[Philandbill]

What @Needapoodle said

[CharlotteUnaNatalieThompson]

@CakeandGo

Is it just me that thinks some of those trees look like a cock and balls?

Nope. Me too 🤣🤣🤣

[BlueEyesWhiteDragon]

Yes there's a car park directly across the other side of the road. It is almost full today which is unusual but there is spaces which makes him staying there odder.

Anyway there is a second parking area further down the road. That ones not as popular as its not a proper surface and the forest paths aren't MOTd so you either have to go through the mud to get to the easy paths or walk up the road.

[AuntLydiasNewHairdo]

I think you had a thread about Trampoline Woman, didn't you?

[Kitkat05]

Please block! Oh this is exciting!!! Would love to see his face when he comes back and it’s locked! Hate people like this. He said 5 mins knowing he wasn’t going to come back.

Update us pleasee

[BlueEyesWhiteDragon]

@CakeandGo

Is it just me that thinks some of those trees look like a cock and balls?

Haha. I can't unsee it now you've said that!!!

[WildWestWanda]

Shamelessly place marking

[Cattitudes]

WIBU to shut the gates, padlock the fucker in, block the gates with my truck AND then disappear for at least 48 hours?

Although make sure there is dashcam / CCTV. Maybe have a chat with your contact at the forestry commission so they know what you are doing and in case they need to join in the fun gain access because they might have powers you don't.

[Fiddliestofsticks]

I would lock him in and parked the car behind the gate? Leave a note on his window saying "I told you to move from my property and you decided to stay. We're away on holiday so I could not leave my property unsecured. We'll let out in X number of days".

[Fiddliestofsticks]

There wasn't meant to be a question mark there.

[Knittedfairies]

Lock the gate and put a 'back in 5 minutes sign on it'.

[TheAwfuITruth]

I wouldn't be able to not lock and block this vehicle in. For ages and ages. I'd maybe get myself too pissed to drive and stay hammered for a full 24 hours just in case.

I mean, yes, I'd probably get arrested or something, but I would just very calmly and earnestly explain that it was just not physically possible for me to not block this brass necked tossweasel into that space.

No jury in the land would convict me, surely.

[ohfourfoxache]

You need to lock the gate

It’s your civil duty

[BlueEyesWhiteDragon]

I have locked the gates and put my truck in the way.

I have chickened out of DBs tow idea as am concerned that if he rings the police to report it missing I'd get in trouble when it was found out I'd done it.

[ChikiTIKI]

You really have to move his car then when he comes back and asks for you, whoever answers has to deny ever seeing their car and say "there was a lady who lived here but she died 15 years ago..."