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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Aibu - wedding dress shopping. Busty experts desperately needed

224 replies

Workyticket · 10/05/2021 17:58

i need serious help! I'm due to get married this July and still have no dress.

Went shopping today and left empty handed and really knocked confidence wise.

I'm a high street size 16 and a 34j

Literally everything I tried on i was hanging out of. They only had sweet heart necklines but honestly - unless you're REALLY busty it's impossible to explain. It really was awful. She kept trying bolero cover ups but they still showed acres of boobs.

I had a little cry when I got home but really need to get sorted. I also have a big saggy tummy which I thought would have been my major hurdle - corsets dresses are amazing for that area.

Can anyone recommend a dress I can buy maybe from a high street store? I just don't feel bridal shop dresses are for me.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
21
MiloAndEddie · 10/05/2021 20:38

Were you trying dresses in your size or were they size 12 samples? (For example)

Wed2be is rubbish if you aren’t a text book body shape.

Please try a proper boutique. They can work wonders on decent dresses, a lot have seamstresses they work with so can get you in with them. They may be able to sell you a sample too to get over the short lead in

NauseousNancy · 10/05/2021 20:39

I’m a 36j and an 18 and I got mine in David’s bridal. They have loads of sizes and loads of gorgeous dresses, and they can alter.

Queenoftheflumps02 · 10/05/2021 20:39

OP, fingers crossed the link works. I also know it is a long way from Newcastle, but worth a look?

www.curvesandcouture.co.uk/bridal-collections

DorisLessingsCat · 10/05/2021 20:45

I think you had a really bad experience, I hope it's not typical. Try not to panic and try not to let it spoil the next few weeks. You will find a dress and you will have an amazing wedding day. The whole of Mumsnet is on the case and they've never let anyone down yet!

Original poster
Workyticket · 10/05/2021 20:45

Thanks so much everyone. My covid jab has caught up with me and I'm off to crawl into my pit.

I'll be up tomorrow with a fresh, less pitying, outlook and i promise I'll look at every suggestion 😍

OP posts:
IwillrunIwillfly · 10/05/2021 20:48

If the only shop you've been to is wed2b, you've not had a true flavour of what's out there!
You need to go to a proper bridal store, but speak to them first and explain and see if they have stuff in that would suit you and suit your timescale. I would try and find somewhere that has plus sizes, not because you need the big size, but I'd say the best thing to do will be to get a dress that fits your bust and get the waist etc taken in. A corset back will prob be good as will give you some adjustment and support so you sont have to worry about what bra to wear! Phone round some bridal shops tomorrow and make some appointments, I bet you'll be surprised.

Amdone123 · 10/05/2021 20:53

Don't despair, op. You will find your dress and you will look amazing.
Some of these dresses are stunning. Wish I could get married again 😪

Lmm34 · 10/05/2021 20:54

If you drive can get around the North East, I can highly recommend Lanchester bridal shop. The owner was so lovely. They have somebody in house who does alterations so they will know what is / is not achievable. They had lots of different styles and I got a really good price. I have not had mine altered yet, as like you I had my wedding postponed last year. It would be worth calling and telling her your what you need and when before going but I feel sure she would take the time with you on the phone. I really hope you get sorted.

Twinkie01 · 10/05/2021 20:55

The monsoon one is beautiful.

ClarkeGriffin · 10/05/2021 20:56

If I were you, I'd take a week off work and book appointments all week in different shops around your area. There must be loads.

You'll never know if something will look good until its on. Get appointments and you'll find something, you will. Tell them beforehand what you'd like to try on so they have it.

Lorw · 10/05/2021 20:57

I’m a size 18 and a 38L bust- they had to order me two sizes up and I’m going to get it taken in the waist by a seamstress, that maybe an option? I chose a strapless sweetheart dress and it made me feel secure and no doubt will be even more secure once the seamstress has adjusted it.

firsttimeoptimist · 10/05/2021 21:04

A decent wedding shop will be able to build you straps.
I sized up to give me more bust room but then took in the waist and built a thin strap and then a sheer sleeve over.

Maggiesgirl · 10/05/2021 21:07

What about something like this pin.it/7qlVDg6

bellaisle · 10/05/2021 21:07

This shop isn't too far from you (an hour or so).

thebridalaffair.co.uk

Curvy bridal specialists.

Look here - scroll down

thebridalaffair.co.uk/sales-items/sale-wedding-dresses/

on the sale page, they have some dresses with a great structure and in your size. As these are sale items I would presume they are in stock, but why not give them a ring and ask.

Maggiesgirl · 10/05/2021 21:10

Or a skirt like this with a higher neck top?pin.it/2DoDOXX

bellaisle · 10/05/2021 21:10

Take care, reading your update, maybe it's more about the effects of the jab...than the dress. I know how awful I felt and feeling awful isn't a great way to dress shop.

Londonmummy66 · 10/05/2021 21:12

If you have a good dress maker you'd be better off having something made. The problem with size 16 clothes on the larger busted lady is that they size everything up in proportion whereas if the only reason you are in a 16 is your boobs then it won't fit elsewhere. If you have a good dressmaker then they will take the pattern that fits you across the shoulders (which may well be a couple of sizes smaller) and then do the large bust adjustment to get it to fit.

I'm only a 34F but it is still the story of my life.

Mmr224 · 10/05/2021 21:22

I'm a 36K and was an 18 when I got married. We ordered my dress from JJS House abd it came in 2 weeks. You can pay 10% more for made to measure. I had a long skirt, corset laced back with Kacy cap sleeves and a small lave panel across the sweetheart neckline for modesty. I paid extra for made to measure so it fitted properly over my bust and my 16 waist and lower half. The corset top made a huge difference too. Would definitely recommend getting measured properly if you order online as it made a huge difference. It looked like the one below bug with a lace overlay on skirt and a laced corset back instead of buttons.

www.jjshouse.co.uk/Ball-Gown-Princess-Scoop-Neck-Court-Train-Satin-Wedding-Dress-With-Beading-Sequins-Pockets-002186373-g186373

I0NA · 10/05/2021 21:28

Are you set a on traditionally long white dress? If not then what about something like this ?

www.bombshellhq.com/collections/dresses/products/edge-of-the-shoulder-midi-bombshell-dress-in-gold

www.bombshellhq.com/collections/dresses/products/gold-grace-tie-front-shirt-dress

I have three dresses from this company and they are very comfortable and super flattering for the curvy figure. As you will see from the reviews and photos on the websites, lots of brides wear them, especially to small or more informal weddings.

I’ve not RTFT so sorry if someone has already mentioned them.

Couchbettato · 10/05/2021 21:50

Can you get a 2 piece like any of these?
pin.it/3s70kFd

QforCucumber · 10/05/2021 21:55

Im a hh cup and like @katherineofgaunt I had an illusion type neckline, it oddly took the focus off the cleavage.

Mine was the ronald Joyce hayden dress, give it a Google, they do lots similar

LookItsMeAgain · 10/05/2021 22:07

Going to throw a curve ball out there - why not go for something completely unexpected like this:
www.mcelhinneys.com/bridal/wedding-dresses/pronovias/pronovias-t001-wedding-suit-off-white/

From Pronovias (it's on an Irish website but they are available in the UK too)

FTEngineerM · 10/05/2021 22:12

@Workyticket not the same size but 36GG and size 14 was before I because pregnant wish me luck still fitting in it for the big day so maybe a similar silhouette.

I went for a high street one, phase eight, lovely Lacey one less than £400 too. I absolutely know what you mean with tits pouring out everywhere, I couldn’t wear anything sweetheart/strapless for that reason.

LookItsMeAgain · 10/05/2021 22:15

Maggie Sottero dresses are stunning:
www.mcelhinneys.com/bridal/wedding-dresses/maggie-sottero/maggie-sottero-brinkley-lynette-wedding-dress-ivory/

www.mcelhinneys.com/bridal/wedding-dresses/maggie-sottero/maggie-sottero-taylor-lynette-wedding-dress-ivory/

www.mcelhinneys.com/bridal/wedding-dresses/maggie-sottero/maggie-sottero-plus-kendall-lynette-wedding-dress/

Thinking back to when I was planning my own wedding, I remember that the brand of bridal gowns called "Essence of Australia" was one I was looking at because for some reason they were designed for busty brides. I don't think that has changed.
Also, have a look at www.curvesandcouture.co.uk/bridal-collections to see if there are any styles of dress that you might like. Take a look at some of the second hand/pre-loved wedding dress sites that are out there as you could end up buying your perfect dress that someone else has loved too.