Aibu - wedding dress shopping. Busty experts desperately needed

[Workyticket]

i need serious help! I'm due to get married this July and still have no dress.

Went shopping today and left empty handed and really knocked confidence wise.

I'm a high street size 16 and a 34j

Literally everything I tried on i was hanging out of. They only had sweet heart necklines but honestly - unless you're REALLY busty it's impossible to explain. It really was awful. She kept trying bolero cover ups but they still showed acres of boobs.

I had a little cry when I got home but really need to get sorted. I also have a big saggy tummy which I thought would have been my major hurdle - corsets dresses are amazing for that area.

Can anyone recommend a dress I can buy maybe from a high street store? I just don't feel bridal shop dresses are for me.

How about doing separates? So a corset type top and a long tulle skirt? Fairygothmother used to do them, but not sure if they still do.

@AccidentallyOnPurpose

This is an 18..

[[https://www.johnlewis.com/chesca-scallop-lace-wedding-dress-ivory/p3407423?sku=237314213&size=14&s]]ppc=2dx92700055388764701&tmad=c&tmcampid=2&gclid=Cj0KCQjws-OEBhCkARIsAPhOkIbymazvSSB4wwV-V8yZoS0efumzPVaUvoWNROpXatYaajizprInowAaAnSVEALww_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds

100% not with my tummy. I'm so sorry - I k ow I sound so sensitive and negative

@littledrummergirl

I don't know how much help it will be given I got married many years ago but this was mine. Would something of a similar style suit you?

you look gorgeous. I daren-t add anything else to my bust area though

@OwBist

How about doing separates? So a corset type top and a long tulle skirt? Fairygothmother used to do them, but not sure if they still do.

I think so, maybe. Will look. Thank you.

I have no idea how reliable JJhouse are but i see someone else posted a link from them.

I think this is beautiful, and while probably doesn't fit "dream dress" it looks like it would sort a lot of your problems.

https://www.jjshouse.co.uk/A-Line-V-Neck-Floor-Length-Wedding-Dress-With-Lace-Split-Front-002254034-g254034/?utmterm=254034&utmmsize=06&ggsub=pl&ggntk=u&ggcid=456240491954&ggkey=&ggpos=&ggdev=m&ggdevm=&ggplm=&ggtgt=&gclid=Cj0KCQjws-OEBhCkARIsAPhOkIZ7IinPfrZOKuYHcT7iRLWjiX-sN2XRgQHncKUofRilSzQXRHV9foaAp37EALwwwcB#/

O op I feel for you. I was in a very similar position as you and left it very late. I was post pregnancy body, giant boobs (34 HH) everything was god awful on me. I ended up just randomly buying of a bridal site and hoping for the best. It actually turned out perfect for me. My main focus was that it had to have straps m go over my shoulders, not thin flimsy ones as it had to cover my giant bra as I was determined to wear a decent comfortable supporting bra on the day. I think I had 8 weeks to go till my wedding when I ordered it and I ordered the maid to measure option, it just needed a couple of nip tucks when it arrived.

Another option would be put out a Facebook request for recommendations of somewhere in your area. A lot of charity shops now have bridal shops, St Catherine’s for example. And I know that a Share and Care charity in a town close to me has a big bridal and prom dress section. You might find trying these places better, if you don’t mind second hand.

It might be worth a drive down to this shop, it’s Northallerton, but I went dress shopping with a friend there and they had a really big selection of sizes and styles, and I think some you could buy and take away as opposed to ordering. They were knowledgeable about what suits people too.

www.bridalfactoryoutlet.co.uk/

Or OP have you considered looking on ebay for inspiration at least? A lot of size 16 (used) wedding dresses for sale some with the brides wearing them so you can get an idea.

Aw I feel for you. I echo what others said about wed2b being no good for non standard shops. Their consultants only work with their own brand, so i felt when i was looking they weren't as helpful and knowledgeable in general. I think with your bust size you need to ring around plus size bridal shops - so many of them have sample dresses ready to go especially with seasons changing during lockdowns , if you've enough coverage on the breast area then you'll be well able to have anything else taken in. They'll be able to recommend a good seamstress too.

Have you looked at needle and thread ? They have some lovely dresses. Have a look at Freida in particular

@AliceMcK

O op I feel for you. I was in a very similar position as you and left it very late. I was post pregnancy body, giant boobs (34 HH) everything was god awful on me. I ended up just randomly buying of a bridal site and hoping for the best. It actually turned out perfect for me. My main focus was that it had to have straps m go over my shoulders, not thin flimsy ones as it had to cover my giant bra as I was determined to wear a decent comfortable supporting bra on the day. I think I had 8 weeks to go till my wedding when I ordered it and I ordered the maid to measure option, it just needed a couple of nip tucks when it arrived.

Another option would be put out a Facebook request for recommendations of somewhere in your area. A lot of charity shops now have bridal shops, St Catherine’s for example. And I know that a Share and Care charity in a town close to me has a big bridal and prom dress section. You might find trying these places better, if you don’t mind second hand.

This s pretty close to the shape of mine, just without the bare mesh in the cleavage. This is on jjhouse. The website I used isn’t around anymore.

@littledrummergirl

I don't know how much help it will be given I got married many years ago but this was mine. Would something of a similar style suit you?

That is so lovely. Is that you modelling it, @littledrummergirl?

@Workyticket, I have a similar top-heavy situation going on and it's bloody hard work to dress for it, I know.

Try Beautiful Day Wedding Boutique, on Etsy, OP. They have a plus-size section, gorgeous dresses! Lovely empire line one.

@AccidentallyOnPurpose

Or this?

https://www.monsoon.co.uk/laurie-lace-and-tulle-bardot-bridal-dress-1499864612.html?gclsrc=aw.ds&&gclid=Cj0KCQjws-OEBhCkARIsAPhOkIZtdjdVJLK-FweFFAEwrGy9acnNn61k68cpNaZAZ95l-4JrlA2oSkaAuH7EALww_wcB

Sorry for the shitty links.

That's an absolutely stunning dress

Similar proportions. I had a Phase Eight wedding dress. Higher neckline (the one that only really shows your collar bones). Worked a charm.

I would suggest not strapless so you can wear a good bra. A v type neck can balance out a larger bust (in my busty experience)

No solutions but solidarity. I remember soul destroying trips to bridal shops where none of the sizes they had in the shop would fit over my bust (36G at the time) End the end went with a top and skirt combo with the top a fair few dress sizes larger than the skirt and then altered to fit better. It’s really hard when nothing fits, involves a lot of imagination about how it will look and faith in the bridal shop when they tell you “it will look much better in your size, this bit of fabric will actually be here” etc

How about made to measure corset dress hand made by Aimee Veitch in the North East

https://corsetryandcouture.co.uk

Some of the examples look to be the opposite of what you want, the point of made to measure is that they will be able to make anything you want and make if work for you. Every bride deserves a dress that makes you feel confident and beautiful And works great in the photographs.

All the best.

No ideas on dress I'm afraid, but re: JJ's house we got a bridesmaid's dress from there for DD and they were totally reliable. It was a standard size so can't vouch for how accurately they do customisation, but both fabric samples and the dress itself arrived well within advertised times.

Yes, that was my wedding day. I have a large bust was 40f at the time, but weirdly found that this style took away from the area rather than adding if that makes sense.

I am a 32GG and a high street 12. My dress is plain but it has a boned top and fit and flare skirt with a belt to make the most of my hourglass figure. It has wide straps that sit to the outer of my shoulders so they provide support. It has a round neckline but not very low (I'm getting married in a church so needed to be modest). It is actually a 12 and I have had it let out at the bust. I had two layers of tulle removed and most of the train to make it lighter. Thanks to the boning I'll be bra-less on the day and it hides my 13 year old pregnancy pouch 🙄.
I tried on so many dresses and found that less was more in the end. Strapless corsets did absolutely nothing for me other than bulge fat over the top I didn't even know I had 😂. Honestly, you're not going to get a dress that fits without getting it altered. The dresses are not made for boobs, so there's either going to be letting out at the bust or taking in at the waist needed.

this comes in white too

https://www.johnlewis.com/monsoon-beth-embroidered-maxi-bridal-dress-ivory/p5299663?sku=239759043&size=16&sppc=2dx92700060382182822&tmad=c&tmcampid=2&gclid=Cj0KCQjws-OEBhCkARIsAPhOkIZPXDDfLXDghAcGlvCnhRqi8OntM802E2VnAvTZBvFUmFW9Tr8vjIaAv55EALwwwcB&gclsrc=aw.ds

I liked a v neck wedding dress that fitted me everywhere else but that I was hanging out of. They added a modesty panel in matching fabric (very cheap) and it was perfect.

The original v made a kind of illusion that drew the eyes away from the large bust or distracted or something and the modesty panel meant I was all secure/ not hanging out.

This was from a typical high st bridal shop, nothing elaborate.

Op have you got your underwear for the day sorted? Seriously get your undies and the bra/corset/combo you’re planning on wearing and take that with you when trying on dresses.

A good bra/undies will make or break a dress.

If you have done. Move along I’ve no other advice. I’ve never married and don’t plan to.