To s***t in the garden

[shhhFFS]

Humorous post. Dp has irritable bowels. It’s our anniversary tomorrow and we are going out for a meal first since lockdown so I decided to have a pamper night with my eldest. Also to have a bath first and to shave areas that haven’t seen the light of day. Also I have very much been running the ship and a peaceful night was well on the cards, largely due to DP putting his back out at work. Basically I needed this before I lose my s**t and he knows that

Whilst I was in the bath DPs tummy started acting up. Instead of disturbing my bath he decided to shit in the garden instead of either A. Coming into the bathroom and s*ing whilst I was in there and this ruining my peaceful bath or B. Demanding I get out the bath ASAP so he could s*t, either way peaceful bath ruined. He’s embarrassed and has cleaned it up.

I don’t have an AIBU because the man I love chose to shit in the garden rather than disturb my peaceful bath time.

So basically despite the dirty deed I feel this is true love and I’m glad I will be marrying this man one day from tomorrow!

I laughed too, @MaxNormal.

But then I found it highly amusing when DP took a dump in our motorhome while I was having one of my long baths, with wine and a book. It was parked on the street at the time, and he could hear our neighbours chatting close by at the time.

I think that would have put me off, rather.

I appreciate space is a consideration but I love the European approach where the toilet is often in a separate tiny room, and the sink/toilet/shower in another.

I think it's quite sad actually.
If this man has a medical condition meaning he has a need to use the toilet with short notice then that needs to be worked into the framework of family activity.
Defacting in the garden is not an ideal situation for anyone. He may not have as much privacy as he needs.
And difficult to clean up, whether on soil, grass or a hard surface.

If no room for a second toilet then this family should consider a small camping toilet that can be used in a quiet corner of the house for emergencies.

MIL has a separate lav, but it has no basin in it, so you have to go into the bathroom to wash your hands after using the bog.

I find that very weird.

Don't believe a word of it.

We have 3 toilet - my children make a point of trying to find which one I’m occupying so they can poop there! I think it was very sweet of your husband.

And this is why one loo houses are a deal breaker, as both DH and I suffer from IBS.

Did the neighbours see him?

Half hoping for a thread on AIBU saying "I just saw my neighbour take a shit in his garden,aibu to put a note through the door or report it to 111?"

Hmmm, what a strange thing to tell complete strangers on the internet.

[quote vikingwife]@Iloveyoutothefridgeandback

I imagine him kicking his legs backwards to push dirt over the poo, like dogs do[/quote]
Hahaha

Delightful. Why the fuck did he tell you? I'd be revolted.

@Lookyloo I smell shite too..but do the neighbours?

@LaMarschallin

so I decided to have a pamper night with my eldest

Maybe DP could have had a Pampers night?

I have IBS - and two toilets

Poo troll ?

@speakout

I think it's romantic.

My OH sometimes urinates in my handbag as a loving gesture.
We both think it's sweet.

Awwww. Brought a tear to my eye. So cute!

Oh how romantic

When you get married and tell friends and family you have a shite husband , they'll be rushing to congratulate you on his thoughtfulness.

I believed this completely up until "6th anniversary of the day we met" because who remembers that? But then I suppose some people do.

I'm falling on the side of "a sweet and thoughtful move, but not one I'd share with anyone outside the family, let alone the DM journos desperate for a story"

On a serious note, OP please put some financial resources into getting a second toilet in the house somewhere. My DS has IBS and we recently moved to a house with a second bathroom specifically for this reason. I've not had a bath in 3 years because I've known just the thought of waiting will set him off needing a shit. He is so, so much less stressed and is actually using the toilet far less now he knows he has a bathroom to himself whenever he needs it.

No asterisks would have been helpful in this one.

Because there were too many letters for shitting,

Squirting? Squatting? Squitting?

MIL has a separate lav, but it has no basin in it, so you have to go into the bathroom to wash your hands after using the bog. I find that very weird.

Not weird at all, quite common where I live.

Wow there are some people on here seriously lacking a sense of humour! How boring

Sad isn't it?

I cannot understand why you want to share this with the world.

I think it's revolting.

I'd be wondering why someone would think that shitting in the garden was the better alternative to disturbing my bathtime.

Sorry but no, thats not sweet or endearing at all, its utterly vile.

Baths get interrupted in this house, perils of 1 bathroom,would never dream of dropping logs in the garden!!

Yuck. Nobody needs to shit in their garden.