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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be shocked by what happened?

176 replies

PumpkinPie2016 · 27/06/2018 18:01

Slight incident on my way home from work which left me feeling shocked and actually a bit shaken (probably safe I know and I am not usually easily shaken).

Part of my route home involved driving down a section of a street which joins a main road at the bottom. There is always a line of parked cars on the left hand side as you go down and therefore only room for one car to go up/down.

As I approached the start of the line of card, I checked no one was coming up/waiting/about to turn in off the main road. There is a clear view in both directions and there were no cars so I set off.

When I got about three quarters of the way down, a car turned in off the main road, quite quickly, and had to stop to wait for me to finish coming down (no where for me to pull in). He didn't have to stop suddenly as there is enough room at the bottom to have time.

I reached the bottom of the line and put my hand up to him to say thank you for stopping. We both had Windows down due to heat and as he moved off he shouted, really aggressively 'thanks you fucking stuck up slag'ShockAngry

I had already started moving and was frankly so astounded that I did not respond and just carried on. There were no other cars and no other passengers in his car so it was definitely directed at me.

I know there are dicks everywhere and i could understand him being annoyed if I had barged through (though that doesn't excuse his bike behaviour imo) but I did nothing at all wrong. I was simply driving down a street.

It's been a long, hard day at work but aibu to be shocked and a bit shaken by this?

OP posts:
BreakfastAtSquiffanys · 27/06/2018 18:39

I had a similar situation (single track road with passing spaces) but it was cold and both our windows were up so I couldn't actually hear what he was yelling at me. But I can lipread well enough to recognise words beginning with F.
It was so utterly bizarre, that I childishly stuck my tongue out at him and drove off.

MrsSarahSiddons · 27/06/2018 18:41

It's because he is a man and some men loathe women, especially those that they think are out of their league. Hence the "stuck-up" word. Once in New York I was walking through the garment district just minding my own business and a guy moving things into a warehouse took time out of his day to shout "Look at that stuck-up looking bitch". Maybe he was your guy's cousin.
They are pathetic.

Willow2017 · 27/06/2018 18:47

I bet they’ve got home and feel bad for reacting so rudely

Oh I bet the didnt!

Willow2017 · 27/06/2018 18:47

they not the!

headinhands · 27/06/2018 18:48

That's dreadful op. Imagine being his wife.

Something so similar happened to me on Monday. Row of parked cars on my side and a slight bend so can't quite see if a car is coming the other end of the row of parked cars. I was almost clear when a car came bombing round the corner.

They hit the horn and just stopped dead in the road with their horn on. They were right at the start of the row of parked cars. It took me a few seconds to work out they expected me to reverse past the 5 or so cars. I didn't look at them when they passed. I was so shocked.

HollowTalk · 27/06/2018 18:50

Imagine how happy his wife is when she hears his car pull up. She's probably on here being told to get her ducks in a row.

busybarbara · 27/06/2018 18:51

This is life as a woman I've found sadly. I take solace in that angry people like this will have shortened their lives due to stress and will die bitter and upset with lots of regrets about their bad decisions Smile

Fintress · 27/06/2018 18:53

I once had to slam on the brakes when a drunk male walked right out in front of me. He called me every profanity under sun then threw the fish supper he was eating right onto my windscreen. I was really quite scared then got mad at the state of my car.

User5trillion · 27/06/2018 18:54

2 days ago.I was called a stupid lesbian for going around a roundabout in the correct manner. What is it with people Confused

HollowTalk · 27/06/2018 18:55

Sorry, @User6trillion, that made me laugh so much. As though the worst insult that could be paid a woman is that she's a lesbian. It's like something out of junior school.

GorgonLondon · 27/06/2018 18:56

I had a bloke blast his horn at me And shout a load of abuse.

He was in a car at a pedestrian crossing, green man, his light was red.

I was on foot, crossing with a small child and a baby in a pram. We didn't get out of way quickly enough for his liking.

I just remember his stupid huge enraged red face and bald head and thinking what a miserable stupid life he must have.

krustykittens · 27/06/2018 18:57

Normally, when someone calls me a slag or a slut, OP, I come back with "And yet I wouldn't give YOU a sympathy wank. What does that say about you?" Obviously don't use if you think you would get thumped but it normally shut them up.

krustykittens · 27/06/2018 18:58

I do get so fucking tired of men trying to put women in their place by calling them abusive names that only seem to apply to sexually active women. There are no insulting names for sexually active men.

Mosaic123 · 27/06/2018 18:59

He was probably drunk or on drugs. Let's hope he gets caught tonight.

Storminateapot · 27/06/2018 19:00

This exact same thing happened to my 18 year old daughter last week except the driver forced her to stop, got out and started screaming in her face through the open window. She'd done nothing wrong, he was a total twat and she was very shaken up.

Gottagetmoving · 27/06/2018 19:04

Don't take it personally. It's about him not you! That's who HE is.
Even if you had done something wrong he would be a nasty git to react like that.
Don't give power to his stupid words.

Assburgers · 27/06/2018 19:04

Do you think maybe he didn’t see your wave?

MyfanwyMontez · 27/06/2018 19:11

Women are just as abusive on the road.

ToeToToe · 27/06/2018 19:12

My mum, a woman in her 70's, was driving along my road, and pulled up at my house.

A man in a van had been tailgating her all the way up my road (a country lane where he couldn't pass) - she clearly wasn't going fast enough for him - and when she pulled in he shouted 'stupid cunt' at her.

She's by no means a doddery slow driver. It's just unexplainable rudeness on the roads - but all too often by men directed at women. Do you think he would have shouted at you if you were a big burly man? Unlikely.

It doesn't surprise me in the least that some men in Saudi were protesting women being allowed to drive. Some men just don't think women should have equal rights be on the road.

CiderGlider · 27/06/2018 19:14

It’s him, not you...

User5trillion · 27/06/2018 19:17

HOLLOW - it did make me chuckle, I haven't heard anyone being called gay as a slur since the early 80s when I was in junior school ! Perhaps the driver was 8, that might explain why he couldnt comprehend the highway code Grin

HollowTalk · 27/06/2018 19:19

It's a shame you didn't have a dash cam - it would be great to put that up on Twitter. As others have said, there's no way he would've called a great big guy gay in that situation.

SoleBizzz · 27/06/2018 19:20

I do not k me what is happening with some men drivers on the roads these days. Tailgating and calling Women names for absolutely NO reason seems to be a fun past time. Definitely on the increase....

Pythonesque · 27/06/2018 19:26

I had a car undertake me aggressively the other day, gesticulating and honking at me. The thing is, although he just about had space to undertake me, there was quite a bit of traffic in both lanes, and I was driving steadily along probably 5 miles an hour above the speed limit. Which was why I was staying put ignoring the idiot tailgater.

fatfeckingmavis · 27/06/2018 19:28

Stuck up = he thinks you seem posher and more affluent than him. I presume you have a decent car.

Slag= you are good looking in his eyes, therefore must be having lots of sex.

The sad little wanker revealed what he thought of you. Don’t pay him anymore headspace.

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