To ask for shit holiday suggestions?

[sourpatchkid]

Ok, I was probably over exaggerating (a little)

We need to take FIL away on hols. It needs to be sunny, short haul and somewhere very "Brits abroad" but not horrific as we have a 1 year old.

I thought costa brava might have nailed it but looking into it is that the nice costa? Do I need costa Blanca instead?

Costa del sol is the brits abroad one.

Costa Blanca has Benidorm, admittedly, but some of the bits on there are gorgeous. And in even Benidorm's defence, it has beautiful beaches. It's just the brits and bars that are so vile!!!

Tenerife is a short flight with a 1 year old and plenty of places to lose the pil at.

How about Tenerife?

Ha, snap

I was going to suggest Tenerife too. Lots of lovely places, but also lots of very British bars and cafes.

You can't go wrong with The Algarve (Alvor is nice).
The Costas are also fine, believe it or not Benidorm has one of the nicest, cleanest beaches I've ever seen and it has a lot of facilities too, think playgrounds, English newspapers to read, foot washing areas etc.
Blanca and Costa Almeria are my favourite.

Malta - Brits abroad + old people heaven.

Ooh thank you, maybe we should consider Benidorm

Tenerife would be great but I don't want to fly that long (4.5 hours) with the baby who won't want to sit still

Benidorm also has lots of family friendly (and as there are sooooo many the competition is fierce so prices are reasonable) and FIL may enjoy a trip out on the train, it used to be the lemon blossom express or something, a narrow guage train through nice scenery. I think the flight is about 2.5 hours or thereabouts.

Salou has had money spent on it recently and is relatively cheap and exactly the Brits abroad type place you’re after.

Failing that then Mallorca. Cala Bona/Cala Millor is that type of place in a nice way if there’s such a thing.

Loret de Mar on Costa Brava would nail it. Lots of nice places nearby you can drive to while they have roasts and fry ups.

Malta, its nice and warm and full of old people. We went and I was the youngest by about 50 years. In the hotel bar, there was a man playing "we'll meet again", thats how bad it was.

Yes to Malta - everyone speaks English, the plugs are the same and they drive on the left! The St Paul’s Bay Area is pretty horrible but there’s nicer parts.

Definitely the Algarve.
Shorter flight for your 1 year old and meets what you're looking for

he would hate a place full of old people, he's 80 but much more suited to an 18-30's type location

Costa Brava has a bit of everything. Someone mentioned Salou above, which is a bit Brits abroad, but is cheap and decent. Some nice villages round there to explore, and you can always leave the baby with ILs and go for a day trip to Barcelona.

Menorca is also a short flight and has a few tacky resorts, but there are also some nicer authentic places in the island, so it has balance.

Alvor is a very tasteful fishing town...not many British pubs etc!

Madeira

I was away to say Lanzagrotty or Tenerife but I see you don't want the longer flight to the canaries. In that case surely it's Majorca or Menorca you want - or maybe Costa Del Sol

I've been to Malta several times and it wasn't full of old people.

I love the Costa Adeje in Tenerife - it has a nice beach, lots to do and really pleasant . However its also pretty close to Playa de las Americas which is tacky and Brits abroad as you like. We usually go for one meal there so that DH can have his pint of beer in a boot and we can have a full on 70s style fondue.

Alicante in Spain. Absolutely love the place

Doesn’t the destination depend partly on what month you plan to travel? If you want it to be warm/sunny?

Malta = no beaches. Also no trees. There are lovely parts and nice to pootle around old places, but would be hard work with a small child - the towns are all steep hills/flights of stairs everywhere. Buggy hell.

Benidorm is brilliant! Old town is beautiful,shopping is good lovely seafront and beach cleaned every night,loads of nice restaurants and then also good nightlife if you want it. Great walks and day trip to Calpe is great. It's cheap and only 2 hours on the plane, honestly ignore any comparison to 18-30s! It's a beautiful family place I've been there on hen dos, with family and on a couples holiday with friends.