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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to hate my Christmas present from DH

353 replies

lilypoppet · 14/12/2017 00:54

I've realized DH has bought me a gift set of chutneys this year and I hate it. Especially as I helped him choose a lovely gift for his mother which cost three times as much and which I would have loved. I can't even take it back because it's gift food. Is that all I'm worth to him a tenners worth of chutneys? AIBU?

OP posts:
MiraiDevant · 14/12/2017 00:59

Some people hate buying presents and are not good at it. Don't equate that skill with love.

Next year suggest that you don't so presents and the two of you go out for dinner or to a show or a concert or something instead.

FWIW I cannot buy presents. I agonise, I think, I research I play it safe. and that;s for the people I love the most

LiquoricePickle · 14/12/2017 00:59

Of course you're not being unreasonable. Tell him that it's great that he is so prepared and bought the Christmas chutney for the house and so could you talk about things that you'd like for Christmas. Or open the chutney and say you hadn't realised it was actually your Christmas gift. Or all of you can gift that to your colleague as you need a last minute gift.

EasterRobin · 14/12/2017 01:08

He's still got time to make an Amazon order with a better present. Maybe tell him what you want if he's that far off the mark.

And get a delicious cheeseboard to have with your posh chutney, of course.

BlackEyedKid · 14/12/2017 01:34

If that’s really your present then it’s a shit present and he must be punished.

Tartyflette · 14/12/2017 01:35

Chutney? Good god, that's a seriously crap gift. Is it likely to be just the one present?
After years of weird and not very wonderful presents froM DH (left handed potato peeler, chunky wooden ethnic bangle so not me sexy underwear which I opened in front of my parents) he now asks me to specify what I'd like for Christmas and I tell him, specifically. He is also very precise about what he'd like. It's usually a gardening tool

MorningstarMoon · 14/12/2017 01:37

Why are so many people whinging about what their DPs have gotten them this year? I'd appreciate a chutney tray with some posh cheese.

CheapSausagesAndSpam · 14/12/2017 01:43

Partners shouldn't buy food for gifts. Food's food! The only exception is chocolate and even that I'm Hmm about.

We'd buy posh chutney for Christmas as part of the big shop! I'd be Confused if DH got me some!

Withhindsight · 14/12/2017 01:44

Gift wrap and give him some crackers as his gift and you can have a Xmas picnic

LightDrizzle · 14/12/2017 01:46

That really is a shite effort. I second the pp’s suggestion of wrapping up some Ritz Crackers for the lazy sod.

Ginkypig · 14/12/2017 01:58

Get him a shitty jam pot set!

Watch his face fall

TheHobbitMum · 14/12/2017 02:07

That's a shit present and I'd be pretty upset at that! No thought has gone into it and it's just a set he saw in a supermarket/market stall and grabbed it being thoughtless and lazy! Can you keep the gift you got MIL and give her the chutney? If chutney is good enough for you it's certainly good enough for MIL. I hope he has a proper present hidden away for you Flowers

Psyfer · 14/12/2017 02:10

My house rules : Birthday or Christmas presents - for the person only... not for the household/general use. So no new dishwasher, oven gloves, car valet kits, mops, vacuum cleaners, loo brushes....you get the idea

MrsTerryPratchett · 14/12/2017 02:14

Does he like chutney?

Bastard Chutney Husband Xmas Angry

Original poster
lilypoppet · 14/12/2017 06:23

He has already posted MILs gift, some lovely Moulton Browne smelliest that cost £39. (I work in a department store so he got 25 per cent discount). My chutneys cost £16 plus discount. So, a tenner. No he doesn't have a decent gift tucked away.he has wrapped them and put them under the tree with our children's names in as well, even though they got me gifts anyway. It's so impersonal and unromantic I feel insulted really. That he has so little respect for me.

OP posts:
Original poster
lilypoppet · 14/12/2017 06:25

Yes he likes chutney. I'll tell him he can keep it. Because it's gift food I can't take it back.

OP posts:
GeekyWombat · 14/12/2017 06:32

What did you get him OP?

TheMasterNotMargarita · 14/12/2017 06:33

I'm shit at gift buying, especially for DH. It's because he doesn't need or want anything and if he does he gets it for himself.
What makes it worse is he is really good and thoughtful.
I do try though and he appreciates the effort even of the gifts are sometimes laughable.

Sounds like your DH hasn't even really tried. I'd be a bit miffed at that too.

SummatFishyEre · 14/12/2017 06:34

Tell him it's not good enough

pinkblink · 14/12/2017 06:35

Have you opened it and had a little peek or where you there when he bought it?

TheGoldenBowl · 14/12/2017 06:39

Yeah - how do you know what it is?

AmeliaFlashtart · 14/12/2017 06:40

I don't understand why people claim to be shit at giving presents. Its really just lack if thought. Its hardly difficult to look at someone, see what they wear,use,talk about and find something in that vein.

listsandbudgets · 14/12/2017 06:41

Cheer up OP. I feel for you, I really do. I think dp has bought me an electric toothbrush. he keeos making comments about mine wearing iut and how i shouldnt worryvabout buying another! Still at least it will be useful.

BillywilliamV · 14/12/2017 06:46

My DH would be wearing them on Christmas morning..bloody chutney! I tell DH exactly what I want and he buys it and wraps it. I buy my gifts from the DC myself and let him wrap them too.
I always think MN are far too quick to suggest leaving a relationship but in this case I’d make an exception.

Frogletmamma · 14/12/2017 06:49

If it worries you so much choose your own present then tell him what to get you. If I left it to DH would probably end up with a fleece 2 sizes too small every year

Jerseysilkvelour · 14/12/2017 06:55

So MIL only got a nice present because you chose it.....

Chutney. Im speechless.