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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To hate staying at other people's houses

154 replies

rookiemere · 22/12/2016 21:15

Just back from a trip to visit family including 3 nights staying with 2 different families. Both were very hospitable and friendly, but Im absolutely delighted to be back home. In fact we were meant to stay for an extra night but changed because of the weather.

I was trying to pin point what I dislike about it. I think its because we sleep on a super king at home and keep the room quite cold. Also felt as if we had to be "on" all the time and Couldn't properly relax.

Is it just me that's like this?

OP posts:
Woopsiedaisy · 22/12/2016 21:19

No. I am exactly the same.

I love visiting friends, but always hate having to stay over. I love my bed, my space etc. etc.

Heyheyheygoodbye · 22/12/2016 21:20

No, I hate it too. Like you we sleep on a super king in a cold room. I hate sleeping on strange sheets with someone else's things around me.

Love to visit family for the weekend though so needs must!

StoorieHoose · 22/12/2016 21:21

Nope not just you. I really dislike it too, I find it quite stressful and always glad to get home

Doyouthinktheysaurus · 22/12/2016 21:22

Yanbu, I hate it!

We only stay at my mum's TBH, but this year was awful. Uncomfortable bed, cold damp house, poor sleep. Couldn't wait to get home. We only stayed one nightXmas Blush

We do go to holiday cottages so it's not being away from home as such, it's being in other people's homes I can't stand.

OMGtwins · 22/12/2016 21:22

This is so me, I wish I could see people and be transported back to my own house and my own bed at the end of the day...

The80sweregreat · 22/12/2016 21:23

Not done this in years, but i do know what you mean! Its not knowing where anything is that drives me mad.

My own bed , my own place, nothing better.

formerbabe · 22/12/2016 21:23

I hate it too.

I also hate people staying at my house!

I'm a miserable cow!

Crispsheets · 22/12/2016 21:23

I hate it. Refuse to do it. I need my own space and own bathroom.

LotsOfShoes · 22/12/2016 21:23

Yanbu at all!!! Even when we visit close family, with the exception of our parents, we always stay in a hotel nearby. You're right in that you're always switched on. Have to make sure you don't make a mess, keep everything like the host likes it, offer to help out loads, feel bad when they say no, always make conversation, awkwardness about time in the bathroom, can't make the same demands as in a hotel room (e.g. temperature), someone will always comment about how long it takes me to get ready etc. It's just a faff. One massive faff.

Original poster
rookiemere · 22/12/2016 21:23

Yes thats the weird thing -I love going on holiday.

OP posts:
SecretWitch · 22/12/2016 21:24

Dislike staying with other people too. We keep our house very cool and always open bedroom window a crack before going to bed. We are also a family of late sleepers but feel awkward staying in bed if our hosts ar early risers. I also miss cats far too much.

SuffolkBumkin · 22/12/2016 21:24

I hate needing a wee not the middle of the night.

OMGtwins · 22/12/2016 21:24

Yes, it's having to go to someone else schedule and feeling torn between what the kids need for their routine (so their behaviour doesn't go totally south) and what the hosts schedule is/what they want... It's so not worth it to have fractious kids because it's exhausting and ruins our time away...

Original poster
rookiemere · 22/12/2016 21:26

Another stressful thing- I go to the loo at least once in the night, I hate the thought of waking people up in the night when I flush so lie there for ages before I have to go.

OP posts:
Wilberforce2 · 22/12/2016 21:26

Nope not just you I hate it! We are going to Cornwall to visit friends this Christmas and they have a beautiful house but I've convinced my dh that we need to rent our own place because of my weird hatred of staying with people Confused

yorkshapudding · 22/12/2016 21:28

YANBU. Even if I really like someone and feel completely comfortable with them I still don't properly 'relax' if we're staying over. I like my own bed, my own space and my own bathroom. The odd night here and there is ok but we recently travelled overseas to visit family and stayed with them for ten days. It was lovely to spend the time with them and they were truly wonderful hosts but I was secretly dying to get back in my little comfort zone.

Original poster
rookiemere · 22/12/2016 21:29

Yes we were going to book a hotel by pretending it was cheap because of ferry package, but thought this would be nicer and easier with DS. But in future one night is my max for staying at other people's.

OP posts:
ChickenVindaloo2 · 22/12/2016 21:30

Same here. I hate being "on" all the time. I live alone and it's great!

LobsterQuadrille · 22/12/2016 21:37

Exactly the same here. I feel as if I'm playing the part of the perfect house guest, when I am far from it. I particularly hate waking up when the central heating has already come on via a timer switch - it makes me feel sluggish and muggy headed - even in the deep mid winter, I like a cold room to wake up in.

And yes to whomever said they don't like people staying with them! It seems such a good idea when you offer - after one night, I'm counting the hours until I have my space back and can breathe, however much I love them!

MadisonAvenue · 22/12/2016 21:45

Staying at other people's house is something I've managed to avoid for years, despite my in laws all living 200 miles away. I hate it. I need my own bed, my own space, my own bathroom.

We had to stay at my mother in law's due to a family wedding in the Summer and it was horrible. The bed was too small, the room was tiny, it was too hot and the window was locked with no sign of a key.

I'd suggested that we stayed in a hotel but my husband wouldn't have it. He said his mother would be offended if we did. Thankfully though he understands and while he visits and stays quite regularly, I stay home with the dog.

formerbabe I dislike having people to stay at my house too. My mother in law stays several times a year.

TrishanFlips · 22/12/2016 21:46

Agree. Hope always to be able to book a hotel rather than stay in anyone else's house. Different when I was young - much more flexible and easy-going then. Even liked staying in other people'say houses. Something different, something new and less expectations from the host.

Original poster
rookiemere · 22/12/2016 21:48

yorkshapudding - 10 Days OMG!

I don't mind folk staying so much as at least I sleep well and we have the en suite so my nocturnal wees disturb no one except DH.

OP posts:
flapjackfairy · 22/12/2016 21:48

I dont really like going away at all to be honest. I am a total homebird.
V boring i know but just cant wait to come home again!

bunnylove99 · 22/12/2016 21:51

YANBU at all. Home is best. The other side of the coin is that your hosts might also be, in the nicest possible way, glad to see the back of you too to get their house back to themselves.

Bluntness100 · 22/12/2016 21:52

Doesn't bother me, we do it quite regularly, but we have a close knit circle of friends and whomever is hosting, everyone else stays, maybe we are used to it, or close enough there is no issue, I also sleep badly sometimes and have been known to get up and make myself a coffee at six am or pop to the loo, no one bothers,

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