To think that dh and Dd1 should pay half each for the missing chocolates?

[Boisderose]

I bought dd2 a really big box of chocolates for her birthday last week. She's like me, saves them. Someone has gone into her room and eaten about 10 of them. Dd2 is really upset. It wasn't me or Dd3 - neither of us like chocolates. Dd1 and dh both have form for this in the past - dh can't control himself around other people's sweets and nor can Dd1. It makes me so so furious. I have called them both greedy liars and said as neither of them are mature enough to own up they need to give me 7.50 each so I can buy dd2 a new box. They are both denying it and refusing. It makes me so angry I could leave dh!!!! (probably an overreaction). Aibu?

Is your dh really going to lie about it?

Because surely he isn't and it's your other kid? And he needs to tell him to own up and take responsibility?

I find things like this just spiteful. I expect siblings to sneak 1 or 3, but 10 just days they don't care!

I think it's okay for you to take steps to make sure that DD2 knows that her gifts/possessions are respected by her parents.

It's probably more likely to be DD1, but I would let DD1 and DH sort it out between them if neither wants to be honest with you. Either way, the chocolates should be replaced.

Says not days!

Sounds like a big fuss about nothing, but it's embarrassing if your DH has actually been sneaking into your DD's room and stealing chocolate

Dd1 is flatly denying it and refusing to give me any money. Argh, so frustrating now what do I do.

Maybe I'll go and buy a new box myself and share them with dd2 during bake off and not give dh or Dd1 any.

I agree it sounds like a fuss about nothing but it's happened so many times before. And yes dh does take their chocolate and yes it's weird.

I'd just take it out of DD1's next lot of pocket money - is that not possible?

Do you really think your DH is lying?

How old is DD1?

And as your DH has form, just tell him he's considered to be the guilty party 😂

Dd doesn't get pocket money. She earns money baby sitting. Before you judge, she has a horse which I pay for!

I agree it's more likely to be Dd1.

Dd1 is 16

She isn't too old to be told: "No, you are giving me X and if you don't, I will be removing Y."

You sound like you don't have a lot of authority over her. No offence.

Buy a nice big box to replace them, leave them in plain sight and let DD1 and DH steal as much as they like - having replaced all the original chocolates with dog chocs beforehand.

Number 1: if you can't trust your dh not to lie about the chocolates, why the fuck are you still married to him. This would seriously piss me off and he needs to know its not acceptable. Why the hell has he been allowed to do this more than once?

If you think it's DD1 then take the money from her.

It is poor form and recompense needs to be made, but if this is a recurring problem I'm not sure fury is the best response (and it sounds like it's not worked so far). Emotional eating is not just 'thieving'. Maybe some understanding and offers of help to learn to tackle impulsive comfort eating might be a good idea?

That sort of behaviour really annoys me. Get your poor DD a lockable drawer or box or something, given that her father and sister keep stealing her chocolates. But yes, make sure that neither of them gets any of the next chocolate treat.

Taking things that don't belong to you is stealing. Tell them you are replacing the chocolates. Get trick sweets. Must be some that stain your mouth or taste of soap. You will soon find the culprit.
I couldn't live with people who stole from me. Kids and DH included.

It's not really a fuss over nothing.

I couldn't stand living in a house where I can't trust other people not to take my things.

But I also couldn't stand being married to a liar.

Would your DH really lie about this and blame his daughter??

I hate it. Particularly as it means you can't save chocolates EVER. I think it's probably Dd1 as she's been here all day by herself. But dh has eaten the kids chocolates in the past then refused to replace them. I couldn't give a fuck if they have emotional eating issues, they don't they are just greedy bastards.

Love the trick sweets idea

How old is dd2?

A GROWN man cannot help himself, has stolen his children's treats before and refused to replace them. What a catch. Ugh, that would seriously put me off someone. I don't know why, it just would.

I'm not sure how you can make them sort it out. Given your DH has done this before, I wouldn't be so quick to assume it's DD1. I'd stop doing something for the pair of them until the greedy bastards can sort it between themselves. Then buy your DD2 a lockable box.

I have never ever eaten any of my DCs treats, Easter, Christmas, Birthdays, nothing. They have their own treat jars too and I'd never dream of taking something from there.

Funny isn't it, we accept uncontrolled gambling is an addiction, shopping even, but not eating chocolate? If it keeps happening then you have to wonder, surely- It's either that or he really just doesn't give a fuck.

I would log the incident. on DD 1's birthday and dh's make it obvious that their present is minus the present the stole of sister/daughter. That way your point gets made and its not up to you to be the adult and replace missing chocs.