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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be fed up with vaping house guest.

136 replies

birdladyfromhomealone · 24/10/2016 18:51

for background my friend and I both smoked, I gave up five years ago my friend 2 years ago but vapes instead.
She is now staying with me so I have been with her 24/7 for the last couple of weeks.
we dont work so atm spend all day together.
she vapes constantly, is always clutching it and blowing vape smoke over me, food, in my face constantly.
I HATE the smell, sickly sweet, it has made my house smell differently. I have hinted that I dont like it but she says its not smoking, harmless etc
I want her to leave I just cant stand it any longer.
not sure if it is a coincidence but I have a headache every day- does it cause headaches in other people.
Dont want to fall out with her over it but if she was smoking she wouldnt do it constantly in my home.

OP posts:
chickenowner · 24/10/2016 18:52

It's your house, you are allowed to say no vaping!

razmataz · 24/10/2016 18:53

Ask her to do it outside. It's very rude of her to vape inside your house without you having invited her to do so. The default should be outside.

You need to stand up to her and just say that she needs to vape outside please because it's making your house smell and giving you a headache.

Snozwanger · 24/10/2016 18:56

How awful. That would drive me nuts in the same way that people at work sometimes spray all their body spray around. I think you just need to pluck up the courage and be honest.

RubyGoat · 24/10/2016 18:56

It gives me a headache too (albeit better than smoking which sets off my asthma). Point her to the doorstep.

birdladyfromhomealone · 24/10/2016 18:56

She has told me its ok its harmless and doesnt cause headaches. She has the thickest skin.
Consttly vapes even when we are preparing food or eating.
I just feel so fed up with it I am going to have to ask her to leave which might mean the end of our friendship.

OP posts:
AyeAmarok · 24/10/2016 18:59

Is she Dom Joly?

If not, you should watch the episode that was on recently with the vaping.

AyeAmarok · 24/10/2016 19:00

Watch it with her, I mean.

BowieFan · 24/10/2016 19:05

I don't like it either, it gives me a headache. I quit smoking (well, mostly) nearly 15 years ago and I can't stand the smell of cigs now, but at least cigs don't give me a really long migraine in the same way vaping does.

chickenowner · 24/10/2016 19:06

Tell her that you don't care what she says about headaches, you don't want anyone to vape in your home!

birdladyfromhomealone · 24/10/2016 19:07

so it does cause headaches?

OP posts:
FarAwayHills · 24/10/2016 19:07

YANBU this is your house and she is a guest and should be respectful. My DH has vapes and I insist that he treats it just like smoking and goes outside. While I agree it's a better alternative to smoking, the side effects or effects of passive vaping have yet to be proven as 100% harmless. There's no way if let anyone blow that stuff over me while I'm eating or preparing foodAngry

FarAwayHills · 24/10/2016 19:08

*I'd

jay55 · 24/10/2016 19:10

Ask her if she's spray perfume in your face or over food, because that sis what it feels like.

MsVestibule · 24/10/2016 19:11

"You vaping in the house is giving me a headache and makes my house smells unpleasant. Please can you vape outside?"

If she refuses, you really are going to have to ask her to leave. I hate 'friends' like this - she couldn't give a shit about what you want, so why do you value her friendship?

MoonStar07 · 24/10/2016 19:11

Was on train on Sat and about 8 young adults 20-22ish I would say based on the fact they were on their way back from a 21st birthday party. 6 out of 8 of them were vaping. Disgusting sickly smell. Pissed me right off. Tell her to smoke outside or leave

Yakitori · 24/10/2016 19:12

I am fed up with DH vaping, though glad that he gave up cigarettes. The wheezing noise the e cig makes sounds like someone having breathing difficulties. Not a particularly relaxing sound of an evening.

Maraschinocherry · 24/10/2016 19:17

Poor you, it's your house, your rules!

It is completely irrelevant if it's harmless or not. You could also ban the smell of coffee if you didn't tolerate it, it's YOUR HOME.
You can put up with it (I wouldn't)
You can tell her to go outside or leave.
If you fall out because of this, I am afraid she is not a real friend anymore. She should have basic respect towards you.

strawberryblondebint · 24/10/2016 19:18

What are they vaping. I vape. No cigs for three years. Feel so much better. I love sweet flavoured vapes but no one has ever commented on the smell. In fact I have asked and most people can't smell anything. Hubby vaped one flavour that did smell sickly but the most recent ones again have no discernible odour.
I would ask before I vaped in someone's house but it's streets away from cigarette smell and odour. Ask her to vape in another room if it's your house. But to end a friendship. Hmm. I don't drink but I don't stop people drinking in my company despite the fact i hate the smell of booze and the effect it has on most people.

paddlenorapaddle · 24/10/2016 19:19

I agree vaping is shit it's like listening to darth Vader as 12.25 to Darlington steam train arrives

It seems weirdly more addictive then smoking it's like chain smoking in reverse

My DH does it in front of the children when they are outside it's ok though it's not really smoking ffs Angry

hollinhurst84 · 24/10/2016 19:25

It's not that it's more addictive, it's that the nicotine is absorbed differently so it's like trying to get drunk off lager as opposed to vodka. You still get the nicotine but it takes longer
And it's 100% NOT smoking, it's a nicotine replacement in the same as patches, inhalers, gum

BowieFan · 24/10/2016 19:26

strawberryblondebint

How about she just vapes outside? Surely most people would do that before doing it in someone's house. I don't care how safe/unscented it is, it's my house and my rules. Nobody vapes in this house or smokes for that matter. Anyone who smokes can do so far away from the house in the garden.

Vaping does smell. Most people can't smell anything, but a lot of us can. I can tell you exactly what flavour is being vaped.

JellyBelli · 24/10/2016 19:28

Why are people so defensive about vaping? To non smokers, its not the same as patches or gum, its the same as smoking. It smells, and its rude to do it in someone elses home. especially after they've asked you not to.

Liiinoo · 24/10/2016 19:31

This is interesting. I cannot smell anything when people vape but DH whose sense of smell is normally terrible can smell vaping.

And OP YANBU. Tell her you love her and enjoy her company but if she can't keep the vamping outside she will have to make other living arrangements.

hollinhurst84 · 24/10/2016 19:32

I'm defensive because of comments. I wouldn't vape in someone's home if they asked me not to though!
I just get fed up of the
That will kill you
It's just like smoking
It stinks
You don't know what's in it
You look ridiculous

I smoked 30 a day and have never ever been able to quit. I have now quit smoking fir nearly 5 months but all I get is grief!
Vaping needs to be seen as positive, if it gets people off cigarettes... But all the above comments I've had and I can see why people are reluctant
I got no comments when I smoked

pluck · 24/10/2016 19:32

It definitely smells, and the smells lingers even outside. I was walking through Canary Wharf last winter and was surprised to clearly smell it in the air. Quite a difference from my benighted suburb

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