Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Going out for a meal whilst on sick leave?

130 replies

Kayden · 27/07/2015 10:18

I was invited out for lunch this week with a relative who I rarely see. She knows I've been unwell and will be picking me up, so I don't need to drive. It's nothing fancy but it is in a nice restaurant and I'll probably be out of the house for a few hours.

I mentioned it to a friend who was shocked that I am going, said it's "naughty". Hmm I am now doubting myself and feeling guilty. WIBU to go out for this meal whilst on sick leave?

OP posts:
StillStayingClassySanDiego · 27/07/2015 10:20

Your friend is being ridiculous.

You can leave the house when on sick leave and you know.... eat. Grin

ButterflyUpSoHigh · 27/07/2015 10:20

Lots do go out but I have never except to doctors or chemist.

A teacher at our school was sacked recently. She was off with stress and was spotted at a restaurant.

MummaGiles · 27/07/2015 10:21

Depends what you're on sick leave for. If it's been for D&V then yes YABU but you can be off sick for a lot of reasons that do not stop you from eating!

ThinkIveBeenHacked · 27/07/2015 10:21

Depends what the sick leave is for imo.

Stress/Depression/Miscarriage/similar then Id not bat an eyelid if I saw one of my staff out for dinner whilst off sick

Flu/Chicken Pox/Scarlett Fever/similar Id be put out if I saw a colleague/member of my team out.

Of course there are a range of illnesses on between which I cant quite as easily categorise as above.

PenelopePitstops · 27/07/2015 10:21

Depends what your sick leave is for. If it's gastro related or flu then don't go out. This covers short term absences from work.

If it's for MH issues or more long term then I don't see the problem.

trollkonor · 27/07/2015 10:22

She would have a point if you phoned in yesterday claiming a vomiting bug. Long term sick whilst recovering not at all naughty.

mrspremise · 27/07/2015 10:23

I think it depends on the reason for your sick leave, tbh...

TheRealAmyLee · 27/07/2015 10:23

Depends what you are on sick leave for. If its a d&v bug uabvu to go to a restaurant but if its stress/depression or similar going out can help healing as its starting to have a life again.

TheHormonalHooker · 27/07/2015 10:23

I went on holiday when I was on long term sick leave. I wasn't well enough to do my job, but I was well enough to lie on a sunbed. I did tell my manager, who was fine with it until other members of staff found out and started bleating.

Go for the meal, it's fine.

JohnCusacksWife · 27/07/2015 10:25

When my kids are off school I tell them "no school, no clubs" and I apply the same rule to myself. If I'm not well enough to go to work then I'm not well enough to to go out.

SurlyCue · 27/07/2015 10:25

A teacher at our school was sacked recently. She was off with stress and was spotted at a restaurant.

Are you sure you have all the facts on this?

SerialBox · 27/07/2015 10:25

Agree with depends why you're signed off.

Butterfly I hope that person takes her ex employers to court. Unless there is a big backstory that's unfair dismissal and they are putting themselves in a really risky position of it was to go to tribunal.

Original poster
Kayden · 27/07/2015 10:26

I've been off for a few weeks, signed off for another 2. I have a long-term condition which has been flared up by another illness. Without going into medical detail, I don't look well and I don't walk like I'm very well either, if that makes sense.

OP posts:
GGabcd · 27/07/2015 10:27

You're on sick leave. That doesn't necessarily mean you are too ill to go out for a meal.

It means you are too ill to go to work.

Very very different things.

Anyone who has immediately sacked has a case for discrimination.

Not that I believe the stress leave and sacked story.

Birdsgottafly · 27/07/2015 10:28

I was on four months sick leave, I'd originally contracted Pneumonia and then had complications.

It was important to build up my walking, I had to shop and I lived my life. I couldn't of physically carried out my job, though.

As said, it depends on what your on sick leave for.

ButterflyUpSoHigh · 27/07/2015 10:28

Yes I have the full facts. This teacher was off for months. Was regularly on facebook with a public profile showing all that they had been doing. They were seen by one of the Governors and sacked for gross misconduct.

SerialBox · 27/07/2015 10:28

John - surely that rule wouldn't apply to someone off for depression in your eyes though? Or stress. Or as someone up thread mentioned a miscarriage.

In those situations it's advised to get out as much as you feel up to. It won't help those people to be stuck in a house 24 hours a day.

StillStayingClassySanDiego · 27/07/2015 10:30

Anyway you've got a sick note from your GP stating you're too ill to work, that pretty much covers you from any tutting off the Hmm friends.

MaxPepsi · 27/07/2015 10:30

Like everyone else has said, depends why you are off.

I worked with a girl who was off with stress, she couldn't cope with the social side of the job - meetings, corporate events, jollies, days at the races, dinners etc etc as it made her anxious.

She posted all over facebook however about her social life, doing those exact same things (bar the meetings) she got sacked!

SurlyCue · 27/07/2015 10:30

So you are either the sacked person or their employer butterfly?

ButterflyUpSoHigh · 27/07/2015 10:31

I am neither. The teacher in question posted publicly on her facebook what had happened.

LittleprincessinGOLDrocks · 27/07/2015 10:32

What are you off sick with? I was signed of sick for a year, but I was fine to go out, my boss had no issue with it. She knew I had depression as well as a rare medical condition and had been advised to get out of the house to help with that.
If you had a fractured leg for example there is no reason to stay in but you might not be able to work.

SerialBox · 27/07/2015 10:33

Wouldn't be taking that at face value. She could well have gone off with stress after your employer had organised a disciplinary with her or suchlike. Going off sick slows the process down (especially where things such as stress and depression are concerned) but it doesn't hault.

I would put money on there being more to it.

NashvilleQueen · 27/07/2015 10:35

Agree that it depends entirely why you are off sick. Popping out for lunch now and then isn't the same as being well enough to go into work for 8 hours 5 days a week.

80srockheart · 27/07/2015 10:35

I don't think the reasons why someone is on sick leave is relevant because it's no ones business why the person is on sick leave.

That's a matter for their doctor and the individual.