to be gagging for a no-strings-attached one night stand?

[Celibacyisnotforme]

Excuse the pun...

Name changed for obvious reasons... and it's not even Friday but here goes!

It's been three months since soon-to-be-XH was unceremoniously kicked out and our decree nisi has just been approved. This sounds like a short time to be moving on BUT the last time we were intimate was before DD was born - two and a half years ago!! I cannot tell you how lonely and miserable it was to be locked in a marriage with no love or sex... no friendship either - only violence, but that's another story that I've posted about on here before.

So I've been unintentionally celibate for a looooooong time and now that I'm finally free all I want is some SEX! It has been too long since I felt the warmth of another body and I am completely smitten with the idea of some affection. I do NOT want to get into a relationship of any sort - I am so happy being an independant woman, with just DD and myself to think about - none of that Wifework for me! All I want is dinner for two, loads of wine, candles and a good hard pounding from a throbbing member... is that too much to ask?

Any ideas on how to go about getting this will be greatly appreciated...

[note to self - must stop reading Mills & Boon]

sarah, you have a subtle flick, most enjoyable.

Right ladies, I give in. Night all. Have fun.

have fun tech with palm

give DW one from us < leers >

a prawn vol-au-vent, that is

.... wakes up with a start. dribbling. shuffles out door

(comes in with the jet washer) Now I'm sure I left some classy girls in here. I've come to clean up the proceedings! (presses trigger)

AF WTF has come over you? Are you having some kind of mid-life lesbian crisis?

This is like witnessing your teacher get really drunk and get her tits out.

Thank God it wasn't friday!

FN - I know it's early, but I think in these circs, the question 'WTF has come over you?' is best left unasked.

FN...it's the volcanic ash

Sending me loopy

< gets the mop out >

Arf at Psammy.

I had a couple of teachers who had nice tits, sadly they were men.

So this is all fiction? What a surprise.

You are just practising your writing so one day you may be published?

To aspire to be Mills and Boon standard is fine - except you haven't had a manuscript accepted by them yet. And despite the derision, they only want people that can write.

You can't. Sorry.

Stick to fictitious nonsense on forums, forget writing fiction.

A little harsh, BeamMysterious, no?

Jesus Beam, you've read the whole thread I presume?

There should be a list of credits at the end of this. To all players who made this thread the best 3 days time waste ever.

I can't leave you lot alone for ten minutes!

Are you a Mills and Boon writer then Beam? It's just that your syntax is a little peculiar...

OMG i got up to page 19 the other day and thought it was the end, now i have to read the other 19 pages to catch up. brb ha ha :)

while I have enjoyed this littel lesbo diversion, I wantg the OP back - I was enjoying reading what she had been up to and I don't think DP was complaining either

what the f, i go one day without the internet and i come back and you have all turned in to lesbian whore bags...psammy tut tut. i am not jealous at all, nope. :(

'Mazin thread. Best 3 hours of MNing ever. For the record:
I also read the pasty's name as ginster (but then I read mumofjz's name as mumofjizz.)

I am 5ft 9" not sure what this information brings to the party but there you go. Maybe it will come in handy (fnar, come in handy!) for the group photography seating? Tallies at the back, Kylies at the front?

I definitely do know what lesbians do. Actually, thinking on, I know lots of rudey things- vinegar strokes, dogging etc included so could be quite useful in translating via pm for the more innocent amongst us. They can then also look all worldly and rudey without embarrassment. I won't charge for the service, I like to think of it as 'giving back' to the community.

I can't remember if I have a photo on my profile. If I do, then I might as well admit that look like a taller and more well built Christopher Biggins in a long red wig. If I don't, then rest assured I look like a young Julianne Moore.

There are deer in my local park but they do not join in with the fanny fingering AFAIK.

OP should return and make some more things up about coming in parks and sheer stockings join in the banter.

i am 5.7 if that is what we are doing at the mo, and i dont think i look particularly like anyone.

I see I am the short arse...5'4.

cough 6'3" cough

Thor... on a diet.