On a mission to moderate or absolutely abstaining - new thread for summer 2024

[Bigbus]

@amdone123 @touty @coppergate7 @swannyb
@Hohofortherobbers @YoghurtPotWashingMachine @Mj20 @Freezingfeetwarmheart @Needtokickthehabit @OhShitImNearly40 @Nowstrong @enoughisenough4

The last thread got full before a new one could be started. I’ve tried to tag some of the regular posters but I don’t really know what I’m doing! Let me know if this works and please tag people I’ve missed.

@ForeverTipsy thanks for that summary, it sounds really interesting and I can see how all those benefits would happen.
Well done on only having the 1 - hope your headache clears.
I was ok at work, not thinking about it. But then I had to prep a few dishes last night. I was tired but it had to be done so I had a bottle of rose to help me along.
And, we're going away at weekend so bang goes being af.
Maybe I should just start on 1st October 🥴.

Talking of podcasts and people to listen to, Craig Beck is really good. He has a channel on YouTube. He makes a lot of sense. I think I'll start listening to him on a regular basis.

@Amdone123 have you got the Drink Aware app? Where you can log your drinks? I'm finding that one good for showing progress over abstinence. Maybe you could set a goal to reduce your intake by a certain amount of units for a set number of weeks?

@ForeverTipsy I'll have a look at that, thanks. I'll try anything.
When I'm on a roll, I'm great. I'm actually looking forward to winter : summer and holidays and tennis is difficult for me.

Thanks for the Craig Beck recommendation - I've just started following him on Spotify and will download a couple of episodes to listen to when out walking.

Loving this thread! I think it's almost full though! Perhaps when the new one is started we could all post our Top Three Reasons To Quit/Moderate and recommend one app/book/podcast to help others as our first posts? Then they'll be right at the start 😀

@ForeverTipsy that's a great idea.

repeating to self
Being tired and cold is not a good reason to drink
Being tired and cold is not a good reason to drink

I would then just be tired and drunk and be even more tired tomorrow!

@Freezingfeetwarmheart 🤣.
I should say this as being tired is a big trigger for me and of course, it only makes me more tired the following day 🥴

Morning, all.
Well, yesterday wasn't good. I'd only had 3 glasses the night before ( aka 1 bottle), but I felt so tired.
We're going away for the weekend and I can't believe I'm apprehensive about it. I know I'll drink and I know I'll sleep badly.
Anyone would think there wasn't a different way of doing things.

Just reading that post sounds stupid.
I think I'll try not to drink today so at least tomorrow I'm as fresh as can be. We get up early to go hiking, which I love. I've done it many a time with a hangover.
Tomorrow afternoon we are going for a meal. I'm wondering if I could save myself til then.
Sorry for the 'thinking ' out loud !!
Someone give me a plan !

Morning all! Still not broken down and had wine. So pleased.
@Amdone123 the plan is don't take any money with you today, so nothing to drink. Enjoy your hike tomorrow and hydrate well and then allow yourself 1 or 2 drinks at your meal out. Now all you have to do is stick to my plan that you asked for. Easy peasy. Stay strong! You can do this!

@Nowstrong yes, I can do that ! Thanks.
You're doing so well - keep going. I need to get my momentum back.

Morning, I didn't drink - yay! Nearly a week off now!
You can do it @Amdone123 , think how much nicer your hike will be without a hangover. I did a 7 mile walk with a hangover last week and thought I was dying every time there was a hill, and DH was wondering why I was so slow. Don't be me of last week!

@Freezingfeetwarmheart that's great nearly a week off 👏.
I'm feeling inspired actually to get my mojo back.

Well done @Freezingfeetwarmheart - that's great! How's it going with the hiking break @Amdone123 ? I love hiking and fresh air, and definitely wouldn't want to spoil it with a hangover. I've always envied people who could do activities like that with a hangover, but I'd be miserable company and nauseas and lethargic etc so just wouldn't drink.

I'm feeling sooooo proud of myself! Hosted dinner last night with some good friends and didn't drink. This was another little challenge I set myself. And I can tell they're good friends because I mentioned to them earlier in the week that I was "on the wagon for various reasons so won't be drinking Friday night, but you're all welcome to". Only one drank in the end - she had a bottle to herself over the course of the evening - as the other two drove. We had such a lovely evening eating and laughing and relaxing in front of the fire with a hot drink after. Nobody else in my family would ever be able to do that, and they'd think I was weird.

I keep meaning to say to @Nowstrong I too have a sister who would put pressure on me to drink when we're together. She's an alcoholic and won't really be around sober people. She found it bizarre last month that I went out on a Saturday night to a karaoke bar up the road with a group of friends and didn't drink. So good luck when you do see your sister and as you keep saying to us...stay strong!

Hope you're all having good weekends 😊

P.s a friend brough me a bottle of Kylie Minogue's 0% sparkling rose drink last night and it was actually alright! Still a bit too sweet, but it was nice to pop a cork and drink out of a flute so still felt like I was drinking. It's on offer for £5 in Asda at the moment so I may stock up.

@ForeverTipsy well done ! That's brilliant to hear. It sounds like you had a lovely time.
Good news here, too. Must be something in the air !
Friday evening I had 1 glass with tea, then 1 more in the lodge. Woke feeling great Saturday morning and hiked for 3.5 hours. We had a great time.
Last night wasn't as well behaved - probably had about 5 glasses through the course of the afternoon and the evening. Ate a meal too. Was starved, actually!
Feel fine today.

@Amdone123 that's brilliant news - well done on moderating whilst away, and so glad you enjoyed your hiking! I'm actually quite envious.

I guess we're aiming for quality over quantity these days? I'm excited about Sober October starting now, even though it will be a challenge. I like challenging myself and then feeling proud. And I think I'll treat myself to a bottle of decent NZ Sauvignon to enjoy in November...or will I try doing 100 consecutive days sober after doing 31?!?! Only barrier is, ya know, Christmas...! But then if I could do Christmas and New Year sober then I'd be pretty indestructible, right?!

My dh went out on a bender last night and got in at 3am. He's still in bed (I was up at 8am to take kids to Parkrun). It's so much harder to NOT be in a mood with him today, but must remember it's his choice and that's fine. He's aiming to do Sober October with me, but has recently bought a bottle of Kraken as it was on offer...ummm...he has zero willpower if there is booze in the house ffs. He even has to stash Cider down in the shed to try and abstain from drinking every day (pretty much).

Sorry for the offload! Safe space and all that.

@ForeverTipsy thanks and no worries about the offloading - that's what we're here for.
I hear you regarding life getting in the way. I had plans for a quiet time now til Xmas, but dh just suggested a weekend break to see my nephew in France. It's never ending.
I don't drink much at Christmas. Never have. It's the rest of the year that's the problem.
I have zero willpower if it's in the house like your dh.

Hello all! Still away with my friend and still AF. No nibbling. Drinking sparkling water and cappuccinos in the morning. Being very good. Feeling very much in a better place than just before coming away. Staying AF is becoming more effortless. But not yet an automatism.
@ForeverTipsy yep it's going to be a battle. Sis isn't a raving alcoholic but does enjoy her tipples, but then again who am I to criticise, when I'm desperately trying to remain AF? However she has no to little empathy and simply will not understand my "need" to be teetotal. Either long term or for as long as possible.

Advantages for the moment are tenfold. Better sleep, better digestive system, stronger bladder, skin starting to glow, feeling a lot less bloated. Generally feeling good. Even enjoying an odd ice-cream...
Stay strong everyone! Sending sunny vibes from Croatia x

@Nowstrong you're doing so well, and your post is so inspirational. I love the list of advantages ; I relate to each of them.
Enjoy the sun - you're in a great place, geographically and mentally!
I'm preparing for winter here. Out goes the summer wardrobe and in with the jumpers. I've also put a rain check on any more trips til the new year.
I'm feeling optimistic about Sober October.

Who's ready for Sober October?

My husband asked me if I wanted a drink tonight and I asked why, then he reminded me that from tomorrow I won't be drinking! Having had a drink the last 5 days in a row (went away for a couple of days) I definitely don't want one...so sober here I come, I'm so ready! Can't wait to see all the yellow on my Try Dry app.

Morning all and well done @Nowstrong , you should be really proud. Sadly I won’t be going dry in October but I’m sticking to 4 af days mon-thurs and I’m ok with that . Once my life settles I’ll do 5 af a week. I’ll be in better place to just concentrate on it. Over endulged the weekend a bit but feel ok today. I’m accepting the break up now, and atleast looking forward more and more. Into routine at my flat now and that helps. Dry to Friday for me, I don’t enjoy it but it HAS to be done

@Jbob1976 I think that's a great plan. We know ourselves better than anyone else, and there's no.point setting unrealistic targets.
@Flumpywoo I'm going to have a good shot at it - I'm not going anywhere, no plans etc. Weather is lovely ( for ducks), so not conducive to drinking wine.
I don't use apps. I find them hard work but I'll look at that one.

Afternoon - I'm proud of myself, did a whole week off! Despite two occasions where I would not normally hesitate to invoke the Extremely Bad Day Clause - my hot water bottle springing a leak on me, and a visit to the dreaded in-laws.

It clearly paid off too, I finished the half marathon yesterday a whole 10 minutes faster than last year! Honestly didn't know I could even run that fast!

I did have a couple last night to celebrate though, very achy today so may have a couple more later too but back to two days a week after that.

Good luck to everyone doing Sober October!

@Amdone123 just remembered there is one day I'm booked on a bottomless brunch so I think it'll be broken that day (need to get my money's worth!) but I want to stay AF all other days so good luck to us both! I'll have to be careful though and drink more slowly or it could be dangerous haha.