On A Mission To Moderate or Absolutely Abstaining? Join us for encouragement, support and non - judgemental chat CONTINUED....

[Determineddoris]

Hi all,

Can't believe the last thread has already filled up!

Thank you to all of you for the incredible support shown in the last thread especially @amdone123.

Everyone is welcome! This is a safe, non judgmental space.

Sorry about my inability to tag everyone but if others can that would be great!

Morning, folks.
Good result here. Only 1 bottle last night, and 2 beers. I'm glad I only bought the 1. It did occur to me in the shop actually whether I would regret not picking up 2, but I was fine with the 1.
No plans to drink today or tomorrow.

Hopefully, next time will be Friday.

@Amdone123 did you have a nice evening? I felt great this morning and the scales were also finally down a little. I have a dinner tonight with paired wines so I’m going to enjoy that but hope to be in bed by 10pm and feeling good again tomorrow.

@Swannyb yes, thanks. I had a lovely evening. I said I'd make a roast beef dinner, which I was partially regretting, but I did end up eating too. So, another win. ❤️

Lovely to hear you had such a good evening @Amdone123 and the moderating went well!

I didn't drink last night - to my surprise really. A colleague mentioned at the end of the day yesterday they were going to go home and pour themselves a very large G&T (it has been a very intense week), I said I was going to try and not drink in November as October was a bit of a Winefest...then almost immediately decided that I would have a G&T as well when I got home too. Not quite sure what happened but I had a glass of squash first, watched a film and then went to bed super-early. Very happy with that now.

So three days AF now in November and I've already beaten October's best run of two - makes me feel like I am getting some control back.

Hello all!!!! Returning after a six month break…. Sorry for the silence but had a lot going on!
since I last posted I did months alchol free but have recently started enjoying alchol again! However woke up this morning with a banging headache and the pangs of anxiety after over doing it last night!!! Seems I still can’t quite master that fine line!!!!!!!

have been reading through and catching up, great to see some of the familiar posters doing so well, @Amdone123 @Determineddoris @Hohofortherobbers @Swannyb

thinking I need to get to grips with moderating again as don’t want to be A/f but equally don’t want hangovers!!!! However I must admit! It was a lovely night. Looking forward to catching up xxx

@Coppergate7 that's really good - those triggers are hard. Someone mentioning it or even a scene in a film can trigger me. November is going to go well for you, I can feel it !
@Mj20 welcome back ! Aahhhh, those pangs of anxiety are what brought us together in the first place ! It is indeed a slippery slope. I suppose that's why some people who are teetotal still go to AA meetings.

We're all doing well on here ( @Determineddoris is on fire 🔥 - 6 months af ). We have slip ups of course but we're trying to be healthier. So, get back on the moderating train with us - you're more than welcome ❤️

so Lovely to be back in comms @Amdone123 and yes indeed this is my safe space when the anxiety hits!!!!
@Determineddoris that is incredible. Congratulations you!!!!!

I loved being alchol free earlier in the year but I equally miss the odd drink…. My plan is to try and find the balance, which up until yesterday I felt I had. I’d been buying half bottles of fizz/wine on a Friday and that was perfect! So just need to step it down again! All thoughts welcome.

also what are others aiming to do? A/f or moderate xxxx

@Mj20 I think most of us want to moderate really because like you said, we do enjoy it ! We just don't want it taking over.
I've had a few short periods of abstaining and I've been so much happier but then I go back to it 😩

How are you doing @Hohofortherobbers @Monstercarp @Mykittensmittens @Needtokickthehabit @Nowstrong @RocketRomanos @enoughisenough4 usual apologies - not sure who's taking a break, etc

@Amdone123 thanks for checking in with me. I managed 2 days af last week. I have been able to moderate the number of drinks each night during this last week and had a few more last night (but not excessive) I've not bought any tonic water so I can't have any gin during the week, and I've only bought one bottle of wine for this evening (none for during the week). Hoping i can manage at least 3 days af next week. I'm starting a diet next week and I know when I'm dieting that alcohol affects me even more, so it should make cutting down a bit easier (I hope! 😂).

@Monstercarp no worries
We sound very similar. Hope all goes well with the diet - I find I'm best trying than doing nothing about it.

Welcome back @Mj20 !
Good luck with the new diet next week @Monstercarp !

I'm going to try and do a few things this afternoon that will make the evening more enjoyable sans alcohol e.g. planning something nice for dinner and doing a bit of cleaning/decluttering.

Hi all,

I'm so sorry I've dropped off this thread! I'm not up to date at all but been thinking of you all!

Life has gotten a bit crazy since I've started my course. It's giving me a bit more structure to the week and I don't drink on days before I go in because I have a long drive, so that's 4 days a week AF. NGL sometimes the other 3 involve a bottle of wine on each night, but then sometimes it's one or two rather than all 3. Overall I definitely feel better about thinking's though.

Hope everyone else is doing okay x

Hello all! Thank you @Amdone123 for checking out on me. Nearly had a slip up yesterday, on a plane. I ordered a G&T when the trolley came round, was tired, a bit stressed. Said to myself, a nice relaxing treat for later on. Settled myself down nicely, poured my drink, the we hit quite a big disturbance and I managed to spill it all over myself and didn't get a sip. Served me right for trying to cheat. I'm doing DRY November. Not dry from time to time November.
Otherwise I am determined. Promise I am trying.
Congrats to all for trying or being AF, we can only do our best. Sending sun and positive vibes to everyone.

I had wine last night, but I did stop and change to a soft drink so I guess that was moderating (even if I did have 4 glasses of wine first).

I pretty confident that I will have a good run of AF now though as I've just dropped DH off at the airport and he will now be away with work most of the week and I'm much less likely to drink when he isn't there/really don't want to drink on a work night.

I'm not so sure about my colour coding now - thinking of putting now many glasses under the red sticker to compensate for that.

LOL @Nowstrong - I think that DRY November is meant to be!

Hi all. Still failing miserably. Have broken up for good with DP due to just a series of never ending arguments and I realise I have to just let him go. I dont think he is good to me or for me anymore but heartbreak is heartache and I amdulling the pain with booze however I start back studying again this week and that is to be my focus. I want to be AF Mon-Thurs from now on but going to take it a day at a time. I will be drinking the bottle of red that is here this evening but then I am buying no more. I cant anyway as I am broke this week so that is a good thing.

@Coppergate7 well November may well be dry, but I was very wet. And sticky. 😂

@Coppergate7 well, you stopped after 4, you didn't carry on. Could have been 6. When I only have 2 or 3, then stop, I just note how many glasses in my journal. 2 or 3 can be a small
win for me - it could easily be 6, so some restraint shown.
@Needtokickthehabit I'm sorry to hear that. I know how upset you were last time. Just take it one day at a time - you'll get stronger given time ❤️

Ok so im doing ok, did have half a lager out last night, had to drink it quickly as had cinema tickets. Not bought any booze for the house for a while, I think I finished the end of a bottle last week. I still think about it every day though, it does help with the winter now the days are much shorter, less hours to feel bored, antsy and thirsty!

Hope you didn't have to sit for too long in wet and sticky clothes. I think you did well not ordering another one!

I'm so sorry @Needtokickthehabit - even though you know it is for the best it is still tough and raw getting through those initial days/weeks💐.

Just half a lager is fantastic @touty!

I've had a 'non day' (so far at least) - no real idea what on earth I have been doing for all those hours since I dropped DH off at the airport. DS not here either. A sum total of 20 minutes housework and the rest of the time arsing about on the internet I think - a lot of that on MN (I have a different username for almost every thread). Whilst I haven't got a hangover I do think that days like this are more likely after I have been drinking - that slight tiredness, slight depression of mood...subtle but if there is nothing forcing you to be productive...

I've decided to challenge myself to only post on this thread and stop using MN to opt out real life and make the changes I say I want to make. We'll see...

@Coppergate7 2 full hours on the plane, then a 3 hour taxi ride. Thoroughly enjoyed my shower upon arrival at destination. Didn't order another one, am persuaded that it was "a sign"... not sure from where or who though.
Enjoy your Sunday evening.

Morning all, sorry I haven't been in touch but thank you for tagging @Amdone123 and so nice to see your name pop up @Mj20 we've missed you!!! You did really well beginning of the year I was in awe and why couldn't I be like you! And now I'm 5 months in (thanks for adding the extra month though @Amdone123 it feels like my journey has been for a long long time ). It doesn't feel like that much at the moment and 'only' 5 months because I have done double in the past so once I hit that mark I think I'll still be vigilant ! Things have looked up tremendously since giving up the poison. Everything is better in my own personal life. I'm in awe of all of you who can moderate. @Touty just seen you only had half a lager that's amazing progress! Hope everyone else is ok I haven't managed to read everything sorry!

@Determineddoris 🤣, I couldn't remember if it were 5 or 6 months ! Either way, it's brilliant.
Bad day yesterday. A few personal problems. Normally being fed up doesn't lead to drink but yesterday it did.
I'm staying positive for this week. I'm going to try to not let it all get on top of me.
On a positive note, my not drinking through the week, eating properly and walking 15k steps has meant I've lost 3lbs, so I'm happy with that.
Next weekend might work out better as we're going out on Saturday, so I won't drink Friday or Sunday. Here's hoping anyway.

@Coppergate7 your post reminded me of last year when my dh went to Jamaica for 10 days. I got so much done. Everyday I cleaned a certain part of the house and I also cooked something new every other day. I stayed af and remember it as being a really lovely time.
This year he's going to America so I'll do the same!

Welcome back @Mj20
Ive had a steady few weeks now, AF mid week mainly. Today I am sick, proper chesty cough, not covid. Drank Fri, sat, sun as planned, now AF Mon to Thurs. Need good sleep and need to lose this slight panicky feeling I have when I have been drinking. Bring on 4 AF days. Good luck friends.

@Hohofortherobbers hope you're feeling better soon.
Try to rest and get some sleep ❤️

Morning all! Still going AF strong here and have stopped any alcoholic showers too.
Doing an enormous amount of walking and stair climbing and most importantly have found my blissful sleep again. Which is, bliss.
So, wishing you all strength from the sun and seaside, very rough and cold sea, so definitively not going for a swim. Positive vibes to all.