On A Mission To Moderate or Absolutely Abstaining? Join us for encouragement, support and non - judgemental chat CONTINUED....

[Determineddoris]

Hi all,

Can't believe the last thread has already filled up!

Thank you to all of you for the incredible support shown in the last thread especially @amdone123.

Everyone is welcome! This is a safe, non judgmental space.

Sorry about my inability to tag everyone but if others can that would be great!

@Bigbus well done ! I'm very glad to have been of help. 🤣.

Well, I'm so happy I didn't cave yesterday. I was tempted especially as the weather was beautiful but played it forward which works for me.
Unfortunately the weather today is awful but never mind - I'm not hungover !

I'm not drinking til Friday, by then I'll be on day 7, so a decent break.
Anyone want to join me ?
I don't think I'll struggle but I know I'll need to be vigilant as it can happen quite easily.

@Amdone123 I will join you, although I’d like to not drink until Saturday. I want to go back to having two days per week of drinking so this week it will be Saturday and Sunday as I have things planned both days.

Ps, waking up on a Monday feeling good felt good! I felt like a normal functioning member of society today 😂

@Swannyb that's great, thanks.
Yes, I always found Sundays difficult but the more I don't drink on a Sunday, the easier it gets.
And so good to be feeling good on a Monday morning ☔

Tonight I had 2 small vodka and tonics in the house, something happened at work that made me angry so that’s my excuse, I don’t have any more booze in the house now so that’s good.

@Touty sometimes it happens, don't worry about it. They were only small ones and at least you've now got none in.
I understand totally, though. I was so motivated yesterday and after work, had to nip to the supermarket for dog treats, I actually glanced over at it and was tempted for a nano second.

@Touty work related stress is definitely a trigger for me too. Something upset me yesterday and I ended up having a double g and t last night. Not happy that I only managed 2 days af but pleased I didn't drink any more. Little wins. We can start again today.

@Monstercarp I think you did great only having two vodkas!

I was beating myself up over my 3 days of drinking Friday - Sunday then realised I should be proud that I didn’t drink to excess for a change so it’s a positive step in the right direction. Let’s celebrate more wins! 👏🏻

Definitely let's celebrate small wins. Gradually, they become big wins. I do sometimes think it's baby steps for me - 1 step forward, then 3 back, but at least we're trying.
@Monstercarp a double g n t is not too bad. At least you didn't carry on.

I was thinking about triggers and especially when we're annoyed / upset.
My dsis annoyed me yesterday and I thought of pressing the f#*k it button, but then thought it won't do any good, make me feel better.
I just had a good moan to my dh and made practical plans to not engage in the same subject we continually disagree on.

Well I’m back again! Was doing ok and only having a drink on the Friday nights I don’t have my kids…but it’s creeping up again. Nothing awful’s happened but it’s just getting back to most nights when I don’t have the kids (don’t drink when they’re with me).

Really predictable and a bit disappointed but yeh, can’t just do once a fortnight. Also found the sat hangover kind of ruined my plans for doing stuff most of the weekend!

So going to have a dry November and then see if I want to do December as well. We’ll see!

@OhShitImNearly40 hi, nice to see you again !
It definitely does creep back up. It's so hard.
I'm supposed to be only drinking on a Friday but I'm at work now ( finish shortly) and the wine witch is not only on my shoulder but screaming down my ear.

I've had an OK day, too. Well, not really - got drenched walking to school job, kids were OK then last 5 minutes, it fell apart. It's not bothered me mentally, I just feel like I deserve a glass of wine or 2.
It wouldn't be 2 though. 😩

@Amdone123 I hope your evening went ok. Welcome back @OhShitImNearly40 - good luck with you plan! I agree that I have ruined too many days off with hangovers and it’s such a waste.
@Touty and @Monstercarp you both sound like you moderated very well. That’s what I’m aiming for really. I had 3 days AF then the last two nights I’ve had one small glass of sparkling wine after everything is done which is perfect for me really.

today is a tricky one. I’m meeting some old friends for a drink and I’m really looking forward to it but going out recently has been my downfall. I have two glasses of wine then the Wine Monster wakes up and it all goes off the rails. I always plan to drink G&T but then just order wine because I like it! I’m determined to prove to myself that I can socialise without ruining myself in the process!

@Bigbus 🤣 - I do remember saying that you needed to tackle the going out out business! Maybe you could redesign it in your mind as a challenge - I've done that before. Got quite stubborn about it. I understand totally what you mean though. All those good intentions flutter out the window sometimes, especially where wine is concerned.

I bought a bottle of red wine, got in and made meatballs and spaghetti with garlic bread. I even chucked some red in there. How magnanimous.
In the end, I had 2 glasses. Just now poured the remainder away.
I had a lovely evening - drank a litre of water before bed, so feeling OK.

November my target is to have 25 af days. 4 Fridays plus God Willing, my new grandchild is arriving this month, and there will be champagne 🥂.

@Bigbus thank you. When I drink on my own in the house nothing bad happens unlike when I go out drinking, usually I get into a bad state if I’m out drinking.

Morning all!
I'm with you @OhShitImNearly40 for dry November.
@Amdone123 the amount of wine that my sink drinks is amazing. If you think about how much we throw away, it's incredible. Sometimes I freeze wine, if I've got space in the freezer, to throw later into soups and sauces. I'm a real miser sometimes. Oh and a little one to celebrate! Congrats in advance!
@Bigbus I sometimes need to make plans when going out, fortunately most of my friends aren't big drinkers, or even drinkers, so my AF beer or fizzy water is fine. I try not to have wine because I like it. Unless we share half or a bottle with a meal and that way the source is limited. Oh the cunning I use to not drink...quite amusing really.
Not drinking when out isn't really a problem for me, but on my own in the evenings is more of a challenge. Doing OK at the moment, as staying busy, then off travelling again. So should be OK. Will do my best to really stay dry all of November.
Pissing down here. Housework today, I love a clean flat to come home to.
Stay strong. Sending positive vibes.

Good morning @Nowstrong - I think having a plan as others have said is a really good idea but then sometimes I completely lose it and then feel worse because I had a plan and couldn’t stick to it if that makes sense?

last night went ok actually. I did have wine because I rarely go to the pub these days and just wanted it but luckily the pub was really good about not trying to push large glasses of wine and if you ask for wine you just get a standard glass. Luckily the people I was with are not big boozers on a school night and although I did have a small glass when I got home (my usual downfall) luckily the cat sat on me so I couldn’t get up to get some more!

I think due to my age though even a moderate amount of wine disrupts my sleep so I’m quite tired now but not hungover. It’s like I’ve developed a terror of being hungover! Thanks to @Amdone123 and the play it forward trick!

October was pretty bad for me - very pleased it is November now. Aim is no red days and ideally all green. Not only have I gained weight but I feel tired and sluggish.

My planner says it all...

@Bigbus alcohol and sleep. Even one glass disrupts mine now. As you say, might be an age thing. Am getting on a bit.

Morning all, lovely to catch up.
@Bigbus I need a cat 🤣. I know what you mean about feeling bad when plans fail. It's the pressure sometimes - when I commit to a sober month ( on here or other threads), I immediately sense panic setting in. I didn't complete sober October ( on here, with a lovely, supportive bunch), but I did do 24 af days in October and I'm pleased with that.
@Nowstrong oh I should do that with the leftovers - knowing me, I'd defrost then pour back in a glass though.
I can be a miser too. £10 on a bottle of wine, no problem ! £1.60 now for a loaf - no chance.

I'm doing OK this week. Those 2 glasses of red wine got something out of my system. Before that, I couldn't wait for Friday ( to get drunk), now today I'm not thinking about it much.
Keep going, folks. You're all doing great in your own way ❤️

@Coppergate7 I think sometimes we have months, or periods of time, like that.
But you're absolutely doing the right thing - you've taken a step back, evaluated it, reflected on it ( you know you feel awful when you go off track), and now you have a plan.
Keep posting and take one day at a time.

Thank you @Amdone123 ❤

I'm definitely at that age too @Nowstrong and @Bigbus . I'm thinking it might be a blessing in disguise...something else to put me off alcohol when the weight gain, money, wasted time, hangover isn't enough! Although the weight gain this month has hit me hard, I am actually pleased to see it.

Morning, all.
I've had a great week - only those 2 glasses of red, so effectively Day 8.
I've just weighed myself and it's going really well - that's a combination of eating less, moving more and not drinking.
And I've slept much better.
Set my targets for the weekend as weigh officially on Monday. I'm not planning on depriving myself but I am planning small changes.
I know I'm happier without the poison ( bank balance even healthier) - I'm going to keep saying this !
Have a great weekend folks ! Do yer best ❤️

That’s great to read @Amdone123 ! 😀

I stayed AF last night - I was definitely tempted around 7 pm, but it passed pretty quickly. I feel repulsed by it in the morning but by the time evening comes…just had to remind myself that I was feeling better because I didn’t drink the day before.

@Coppergate7 yes, such a good point. It's my best friend when I'm on it - 3am I absolutely loathe it 😩

Wahooo! It’s Friday night here and I’ve done it! I was quite worried about this evening and what I’d do, but I’ve had a few very slow vodkas at home to relax and celebrate a great week of eating right and exercising. I’ve just done my skin care, pyjamas and relaxing on the sofa - no more drinks necessary 😀 I can’t wait to feel good tomorrow and do my last workout of the week.

Hope everyone is doing well and this positivity inspires someone else to get through their Friday the way they want to.

@Swannyb well done ! And it's definitely inspired me.
I'm aiming for 1 bottle this evening as it's daft losing weight through the week, only to put it on at the weekend. Might as well not bother !
You're going to feel brilliant tomorrow ❤️