Mindfulness, Moderating and Not Texting In The Kitchen !

[Amdone123]

Morning all..hope you're all ok. Well I had busy weekend. I didn't quite stick to my plans : I drank Friday evening ( didn't eat), and drank last night, too. I don't feel great today but I am looking forward to having a break. I know I want to get back to being af and all its benefits.
I was thinking that I am able to stay in and not drink. My next step will be going out and not going mad !

Hi Amdone123!
Thanks for the welcome!

As to your question, I've always been a creature of habit and have always had 3 days af a week - Sunday, Monday and Thursday. I am that boring and predictable!
Prior to the pandemic I would drink half a bottle of wine on Tuesday and Wednesday nights, then a up to, but not always a whole bottle on Friday and Saturday. A bottle is enough to get me nicely stoated, with a mild hangover next day. So generally less than three bottles a week.

Just before pandemic I was unwillingly left single, aged... well, 'aged'!
(I'm mid fifties).
I then had a wonderful rebound relationship where I didn't drink much as we lived a good distance apart and generally drove to see each other.

That relationship didn't survive lockdown, and my job also changed to a very public facing one where I now have to organise and run dinners, entertain clients etc.
The culture is quite different to my previous job, and drinking in the evenings is a norm.

So, my drinking crept up a little, 3 bottles of wine a week being the norm rather than the exception. Not huge, but very consistent. Also my attitude to it. After one glass, I'm like a little wine-Gollum, looking out for my next precioussssss!

Bloody hell, you asked me one question and I've given you my life story!

I suppose I'd like to be able to have a glass or two for the buzz, again, a few nights a week. Enjoy it and then stop. I was concerned that I was on a slippery slope, and wanted to put the brakes on!

Evening all!!!!
just wanted to pop by and report…. I’ve stayed completely sober on my birthday! M first sober birthday since I was pregnant 15 years ago! And I’ve had the nicest day! When out for dinner I thought about ordering just one but actually much like @Amdone123 did with the tennis….. I realised I wouldn’t have enjoyed the experience any more for having booze!!!!! I’ve now had two lovely (and expensive) bottles gifted! But am defo saving them for a special occasion after dry January!!!!

Can anyone remember how long it takes to build a habit? Is it 40 days???

@Amdone123 @TripleTipplePipple @stoppingnow @Soberjan your all doing soooooo well! Whether you’re tee total, moderating, aiming for streaks or just being mindful and making small, but amazing steps, I honestly think everyone is doing so well!!!! And in all the messages it’s so apparent how our mindsets are switching and everyone’s got some wins under their belts!!!

welcome @chatelai nice to catch up on how your doing…. And 9 days off the bat is amazing!!!! I look forward to you being part of the lovely group and us all supporting one another!!!

night from me all!!!! Excited to wake up hangover free after a birthday 🥳 xxx

Welcome @chatelai, good to gave you on board. Happy birthday and very well done @mj20! I'm dry but was craving and feeling deprived earlier, bud zero and a stack of choc hobs have sorted me out. Off to bed now, night!

@Hohofortherobbers thats awesome you resisted!!!! Good work 🥰 xx

@Mj20 that's amazing happy birthday for yesterday and well done for not drinking !! Must have felt an elation after that many years a sober birthday wow and you seem so happy so pleased for ya love. What are your weekend plans ?
Welcome @chatelai ! I love how you describe your drinking pattern as boring but to me that's what I was aiming for!!! I hear you about the creeping up in lockdown etc it was always the case for us too but me and DH progressed to whisky and stuff at the weekends rather than wine. Don't do that anymore it's just the wine bitch I mean witch who comes knocking generally but tbh I have been more mindful. I only drank on Tues and last night this week whereas it would have 100 per cent been every day! I am out tonight but already been looking at the non alcoholic stuff on offer so I can maybe alternate or just not drink I'm not sure! @Hohofortherobbers and @stoppingnow and @Amdone123 hope you are all doing well sounds like you are mostly feeling positive. On the dry Jan thread there's a lot who are not going out at all because of the temptations to drink I can't not go out as it's my best friend's birthday tonight ! But it's a plan if you want to abstain for a month. I didn't sleep well at all last night but then the last 3 nights without drink I also didn't sleep well so I can't win anyway lol hope everyone has a fab weekend ! Oh not forgetting @TripleTipplePipple hope you are ok x

It has NOT been a good month for me. I will read through thread and update.
Totally agree with@Mj20 that it is the mental health aspect that I notice most, anxiety and flatness is not the way to greet the precious gift of a new day to enjoy.

@Mj20 , wow , you're smashing it !
I'll post later as I'm just watching tennis - just needed to say that to @Mj20 🤣

@Buntyforgirls , hi, sorry you've not had the best month - you can only keep trying. Keep posting and we'll support you. You're so right about the horrible hangover - it ruins your day. Well, it does mine. I don't get anything done - just lie in bed eating KFC out of the bucket 🤣. Not funny really.
Well, so far I've had 16 af days in January, so I'm pleased with that. This morning I realised I'm on day 7 ( straight run). I hadn't even noticed. Though I did struggle yesterday. I broke my low carb health kick and ate 3 bars of chocolate. Better than wine I suppose.
I'll probably drink today as we're going out. I've set myself a target of 2 glasses and will try to not carry on later.
Have a good day, everyone.

@Amdone123 the tennis made me chuckle! Enjoy xx

@Buntyforgirls im so sorry you haven’t had the best month, and I hope in amongst that you can be kind to yourself. Imagine how you’d treat one of us in your position and try to apply that to yourself!
it’s awful when alcohol has such a detrimental effect on your mental health, and my anxiety after binging is just terrifying- has been for years! but still Ive slipped up previously and over done it, I guess we can only try our best!
we are all here for you. Chin up xxx

Evening, everyone.
How are we all doing?
Well, my lunch out was cancelled. I was a bit disappointed as I was looking forward to getting dressed up, etc. I was then considering going to the shops for wine, but I couldn't be bothered. I actually quite like this about me and my habit : even though I fancy a drink, I won't actively go looking for it !
Had a (nother) lazy day instead - lots of healthy food and water.
I'm practically a nun 😇

Hi, we'll done for your 7 day steak @Amdone123, sorry your lunch was cancelled, is it rearranged again so you can look forward to it? I'm here and dry, headache AGAIN this morning! I don't get it, just Saturday mornings, I slept in but only until 8:30 so not like a mega lie in so don't think it's low blood sugar. I hammered the choc hob nobs last night, but that's not so out of character for me these days

@Hohofortherobbers , does too much sleep give you a headache? Just asking, because it can do with me. I know it wasn't too late, 8.30am, but then again, I'm an early riser, so that's late for me.
Forgive my waffling !
Well, we go out every Saturday for lunch ( with our granddaughter - we are working our way through cuisines 🤣). This week was to be Turkish. So, we'll go next Saturday. It was actually my granddaughter who cancelled because she was tired ( she's 7 !!), but she has been in a couple of tennis tournaments this week. Poor lamb !

Wow your gd has sophisticated tastes, how lovely I'm usually up at 6:30 so maybe it is the extra 2 hours, I don't notice it on Sunday though, very odd.

Morning , just checking in. Had an early night last night, no wine !!! Whoop, here's to day 2 🤞Sorry your lunch was cancelled @Amdone123 , at least u can look forward to next Saturday. @Hohofortherobbers hope your head is feeling okay this morning . Have a great day

@stoppingnow , yay, well done ! Saturday nights can be difficult, so good for you.
I find Sundays difficult. Dh is working all day today so it's just me and the dog.
I need a plan !
Need a food shop but I know if I go out, I'll pick wine up.
Considered an online shop but last time I did that, I still put wine in the basket.
My dh isn't fussy about tea ; it's just me thinking I'll make him a lovely roast - I know if I do that, I'll drink.
Not sure what to do today !!

Me again
I could have a drink today - I'm just examining my reasons. But I've decided if I do, I do - take the pressure of myself.
I haven't drank since last Saturday and I've had double figure af days in January, so all good. And I am pleased with my progress.

Morning @Amdone123 . Why not click and collect your shopping but decide now that you won't buy the wine at that shop. You will think it over during the day and can always go and get some later if you still decide to drink. Just don't buy it right now as the feeling may pass. Buy a really delicious soft drink at the click and collect. How about Cawston apple and Rhubarb sparkling. It's really lovely but about £4 for 4 cans so a definite treat. Good luck. You can do this.

Thanks @Hohofortherobbers , I'll definitely try that !

Many thanks all for the warm welcome back. You are all doing fabulously!
Here's to getting back to mindfulness and moderating-
Seeing wine as a treat, like chocolate and chips and cake, not a daily habit.
Have a good day everyone!

Hi all, @Amdone123 sorry your lunch was cancelled ! Your GD sounds amazing though my older one who's 10 won't try anything new! And yes take pressure off yourself you have done well but just see how you feel before you take the drink too. I'm one to talk as I went mad last night at my friend's birthday party....I was conscious I was getting large glasses of water at the same time as a drink but I ended up mixing my drinks so all the wine colours plus fizz plus gins. Everyone else had a kebab after except me and I didn't eat anything but 2 slices of pizza all day so that's my fault! So I'm full of anxiety heart palps the lot and laying in bed in the freezing cold (although I had to take one child to activity at 830am this morning how I did that no idea)...yuck feeling really sick so yeah to those who didn't drink last night thank fuck you ain't feeling like me! And well done guys xxx

1st new moon of 2023, so a good time to set new intentions ... and trying to keep them!
@Soberjan , hope you are feeling better

Thank you @Buntyforgirls and I like the new moon 🌒

No alcohol certainly makes Sunday Night feel like Sunday Night!!

Morning all. @Soberjan ,how are you doing? Hope the hangover resolved quick. @Amdone123 did you decide to drink yesterday? How are our newer posters doing? @chatelai @Buntyforgirls @stoppingnow are you still here? I'm here and dry, still sleeping well but eating too many hob nobs.

Morning, all !
@Hohofortherobbers , yes, I did drink in the end. I wanted to really so the decision was pretty much made. I had a good day, made a lovely dinner and also cleaned the house from top to bottom.
I feel OK today - I'm pleased with my af days so far.