Mindfulness, Moderating and Not Texting In The Kitchen !

[Amdone123]

Morning all..hope you're all ok. Well I had busy weekend. I didn't quite stick to my plans : I drank Friday evening ( didn't eat), and drank last night, too. I don't feel great today but I am looking forward to having a break. I know I want to get back to being af and all its benefits.
I was thinking that I am able to stay in and not drink. My next step will be going out and not going mad !

Sounds like sensible moderating @Amdone123 . Glad you're feeling good about it

Ridiculously smug in bed last night about being AF! Fabulously restful sleep.

@Buntyforgirls , that's great.
I'm hoping for the same tonight !

Well done @Hohofortherobbers you are doing awesome and @Buntyforgirls sounds great! Yes my hangover was better but I am kicking myself for going over but I realised I didn't eat anything substantial and last time I did etc so it's the key to not going over!!! I've had such a bad day today and im thinking of drinking when I get home.....arhhhhhhhhhh

Hi all!
just catching up!
@Amdone123 i love how diplomatic and understanding you are towards yourself! And you always seems so positive! Keep going as you are! You’re doing great!
@Soberjan glad the anxiety has passed! It’s just hell when you feel like that!!! And try not to be too hard on yourself! @Buntyforgirls congratulations on the good sleep! Such a lovely a/f reward!!!! @Hohofortherobbers and @TripleTipplePipple how are you doing??

still going strong here…. Day 24 alcohol free! Can’t quite believe it and not sure where my resolves come from but I’m feeling super confident. Now I’ve conquered my bday I feel like I can do! I don’t know what my long term plan is! Prob need to considerate that really!

anyway keep up the good work guys xxx

@Mj20 , day 24 ! 👏
Absolutely fantastic. Great that you're thinking long term. Maybe at the end of January, you could have a think and evaluate what you want your relationship with thee alcohol to look like. It's funny how when you're abstaining, we take it one day at a time, but we do have to think long term too. It hurts my head sometimes!
I remember when I did the 30 day Annie Grace experiment. I loved it, then got to the end and nowhere to go ! I limped along for another 10 days I think it was, then fell off the wagon 😏
Anyway, keep going - you're doing so well.
I've done nothing today except watch tennis. I think my dog will be glad to see thee end of the Australian Open 🤣

So @Amdone123 this is my worry! I get to the end without any direction so carry on never drinking? Or have a massive blow out….

I think my dream relationship would be a couple of glasses now and then with no routine to it. So I’m a typical… oooooh it’s Friday I’ll open wine… or ooooh I’m making a nice tea I’ll have wine whether I want it or not it’s just my immediate go to! But I do love a glass of something so don't want to go tee total…..

all thoughts welcome!

a relaxing tennis day sounds good xxx

@Mj20 , I remember us discussing the Friday thing before and agreeing that it was ridiculous to drink just because it's Friday !! And the nice tea, etc, I get that. I wanted to drink yesterday for that exact reason.
I think this reset has been really good for you though - I don't think it will automatically be your 'go - to' anymore, because you're already questioning it.
I know you asked about habits the other day. I meant to look it up for you. I'll do it in a bit. I think I remember a habit is broken after x amount of times....

@Hohofortherobbers so after all your posts about hob nobs (never had before ) I basically bought some yesterday and ate the entire packet .... Just thought I should let you know ! It might be a new addiction which is fine better than wine!
Hope everyone else is ok! How are you all doing ? X

@Soberjan I've become a pusher!!!

Glass of cold milk alongside a generous stack.... Delicious

@Hohofortherobbers a stack my goodness I can't believe how good they are....I might need to buy in bulk from Amazon!

Evening, all !
All good here. I've been to work / exercised and weighed myself.....and even though I drank wine on Sunday, I lost 4lb ! Well pleased - I think the not drinking through the week helps me enormously.
Af today, tomorrow and Thursday but not Friday, as I'm at a funeral ( I never go to 'wakes' - I don't like them, but I'll definitely be going to this one).
Hope you're all ok.

Good afternoon! I'm sorry I haven't posted for a while, I've been busy wresting with the idea of completely abstaining from alcohol but I'm not ready yet. I have been listening to alcohol explained by William porter and it's eye opening! I have cut down my drinking a lot. But I'm going to see if I can moderate and I know some people say you can't successfully but I want to treat it as a treat not a daily habit which @Buntyforgirls has cleverly said!

How is everyone doing ? I've had terrible acid reflux the last week and it was made so worse by drinking my fav wine 🍷 😩 so I haven't drank last night or won't tonight I want to aim
For 1 night a week !
Does anyone have any advice on the wine witch triggers or I normally want to reach for the the drink when the kids or work have stressed me out!

I won't be keeping any alcohol in my house either, only on the night I will be drinking one night a week x

Hi all, thanks for asking how it's going.
Day 13 in the af household...
Did a weekend away with friends who I usually get quite merry with, still had a fantastic time and had a walk on the beach while they were sleeping off their drinks, came back with hot croissants and jam like a virtuous little whatsit. I'm so Pollyanna about things, I'm even making myself a bit sick...😎

On the negative side, the first glow has gone off it - no longer feeling hungry all the time, and now having to face a very long-term eating disorder which is doing warm-ups in the wings (this is a battle which has raged and blustered over 39 - odd years, so nothing new; the lack of having a drink as an alternative stress release to eating etc is...)

Will keep you posted.

Do all keep on keeping on! Now I know how easy it is to just stop, and how amazing the first week af is, I can see a more healthy pattern of moderate drinking with some weeks off, which I will enjoy, as a future plan.

Peace, love and light (as Spike would have said!)

Hi @indieray . I don't allow myself to shop during the wine witching hours, I shop early when I'm strongest. Helpful to shower early and be in Pjs early too, less likely to cave and go out to a shop in the evening. Develop a new habit of a particular soft drink at the usual wine witch time. I have a herbal tea now after dinner. AF beer really hits the spot too if she's being very persistent. I like bud zero or becks blue. I also have an AF mulled wine which is lovely, warmed for 30secs in the microwave and drunk out of a wine glass. I can fool myself it's a shiraz!!

This may be coincidental but I gave noticed today my fingernails look fabulous, they are strong and they shape well, cannot remember them ever looking this good, haven't noticed any improvement in hair yet.... Or face

Morning ! @Hohofortherobbers , i dont think that's a coincidence.
Alcohol inhibits the absorption of nutrients such as B1, B12, folic acid and zinc.
Enjoy your talons !
I always notice a difference in my skin. My nails are always a mess 🤣

What @Amdone123 says @Hohofortherobbers about the nutrients! I never notice my face fully just the nails. Are you planning on not drinking after dry Jan @Hohofortherobbers ? How is everyone else ? I hope you are all well! I'm not in the greatest of mind sets unfortunately and DH is out tonight which means I will drink something.

Hi @Soberjan , I kind of think I will keep it up for a bit longer, to justify my ring purchase will make a good dent into Feb. But I feel so much better AF I wish I could convince myself just to be teetotal. Remember when smoking was social and it was easy to smoke when you were out. Then smoking became massively anti social and it was easier to stop. I almost wish the same could happen with booze. If I had to step outside into the rain to have a glass of wine and leave my friends at a table in the warm cosy pub chatting then I'd stop wouldn't I? Just like I did with smoking.

@Hohofortherobbers that's such a good analogy! I never was a smoker but I'm old enough to remember clubbing when people could smoke in pubs and clubs and coming home stinking of fags my hair my clothes & is always nip out in the smoking area with my friend who smoked even though I didn't ! I wish it was the same with drinking ! My best friends husband is Muslim & we all went out to a halal Muslim restaurant & it was no alcohol served & so u no what we had the best meal n night ! Beautiful food and no hangover next day ! I wasn't triggered at all as no one could drink ! & no sooo much cheaper !

I've struggled tonight seems to be between 630-8 for me.. my partner works away so I do the whole evening cooking bath bed by myself every night and afterwards I feel I deserve a treat ! But it's just hard to switch off that craving but I didn't drink !! 👏🏼 I just stuffed my face with Doritos instead 🥴🤣
Me n my partner will only b drinking one night on the weekends and this time it's Saturday!

Hope everyone is doing ok and if your not that's ok , we are only human 💕

** meant to say I do the whole evening routine with the kids by myself , not just me ! 🤣🤣

Interesting thoughts regarding the smoking. I do think times are changing though as I read a statistic somewhere about the decline of drinking in young people. Apparently, they'd rather go out for a meal. And I look at my ds (34 - teetotal) and his cousins / peers, and it seems true in their circle. Plus, they all drive.
@indieray , well done on not rewarding yourself with a drink. I totally understand that notion of a reward - something to look forward to. The 1st glass is ok......😏
When I was working yesterday, I had that thought - that I'd get wine on the way home. After a few mental gymnastics ( in which I won Gold), I decided I didn't even want a drink.
Also, I don't want to go to the wake now after the funeral tomorrow. I want to go to the church service and come home. Problem is my sister thinks we're going out for a few.
Oh well, she's very understanding. If I say I don't want to drink, she'll be fine.
@Soberjan , if you ended up drinking, it's no big deal. Just keep trying.

Omg I wrote the longest message ever on this thread and it reset and said oops something went wrong ..grrrr mums net . I'm going to try again after getting the kids up...

Hi all!!!! Just catching up on everyone’s news @Amdone123 @Hohofortherobbers @Soberjan @TripleTipplePipple @chatelai @indieray!!! Good to hear how you’re all doing!!

all is going ok with me!! Still AF… that’s 27 days now! And I must say…. I feel better for it!!!! I really do! I’ve noticed my skin… although it kind of got worse before it got better (toxins) but just more my mental health, and general well being!!!

I feel like I could do this forever but then I love the association of alcohol as a treat so with that in mind, and my last chat on here about the future and drinking…. that is how I’m going to redefine my relationship with booze! As a special treat rather than a given….

I must say I am very much looking forward to a glass of something but I’ll wait for an occasion and try to moderate!!!!

anyway I hope everyone’s ok 😘