New Year, New Start. Probably dries and lows as we Tryers to be Dryers try 2019.

[Frouby]

New thread for the New Year.

Support thread for those who want to moderate and reduce alcohol. Absolutely no judgement, just advice and support. Absolutely everyone is welcome whatever your goals or hopes for 2019.

Am no good at clicky linke but there are previous threads and we look forward to continuing to moderate and reduce in 2019.

Especially today. 14 coming for 3 courses at 3pm and I have a raging hangover to start the year. Fml.

Dion I am not generally a person that bakes either. My original plan was to buy ready rolled pastry because its a lot of fucking about for what is essentially an edible plate for your pie/quiche. But my cousin came round earlier with 2 packs of stork that needed using so I girded my loins and made 2 twatting quiches. We have a gazillion eggs so at least it was a cheap meal.

I would love to bake more but life is just to short. Unless I am making carrot cake. In which case I make time. And in the summer I make courgette and lemon drizzle cake which sounds odd but is lovely. And uses up some allotment courgettes which apparently love horse shit . And apple and blackberry crumble as soon as the apples are ready.

And occasionally twatting quiche. It is nice though and worth the faff.

If I didn't drink as much I could so be the kind of mum/wife who bakes.

But prefer being slightly pissed to slightly dusty from flour .

Thanks all for the welcome.

Don’t be impressed by the 8 days. I really need it. Starting to drink to levels that appear in Daily Mail articles under the headers of ‘nappy valley booze crisis’

I have noticed I am much more patient with the kids...and have done things like clean the fridge and my DD’s shit hole of a bedroom. All of this freaks me out slightly.

Dry Days app is working insofar as I seem to respond better to sticker charts than my 5 yr old.

Flossie: I scrolled back through the thread. What a bitch. I can’t believe people like that exist. Karma is also a bitch though.

Bed now with a book. Rock and roll.

Tired, your post made me laugh. Especially the bit about sticker charts and Nappy Valley Booze Crisis. I would be in that article as well.

Rock and roll here too, as I am going to bed now before I succumb to the bottle of port winking at me in the kitchen.

Longest, I bought paint today as well. It will join the collection of 'unopened paint tins I will use in the many long AF evenings, when I spend my time making my house all lovely'.

Frouby, I want to come to your house for any meal at all.

Flossie, how are you now?

Tired - I’m in nappy valley too!!

Frouby - dion and I have chatted and booked train tickets and we should be with you by midday for twatting quiche and curry. That sound ok to you?? We will being a bottle

Dion - I’m ok thanks. Slightly tipsy. Fml. But I was never gonna stay dry tonight!!

Fucking thing keeps posting before I ready!!

I downloaded the dry app. I’ve had reminders all day on being dry and asking how I’m doing!! I’m almost scared to hear the notification ding on my phone!! Bloody hell!! It’s a powerful app!!

Hi Tired - I’ve also got the dry days app but now I’m jealous cos you’ve got more stickers than me 😅 We’ll done. I’m off to bed to sulk.

Flossie - the App is a bit stalkerish. It checks up on you the morning after too!

I’m off to bed too, and I’m grumpy. The car is dead. Tried a portable charger for the battery and no joy. I’m pretty certain my starter motor has gone. My dad wants to come up and have a look at at because well obv I’m a female and may not have a clue what I’m doing .

Also been looking at selling up and renting tonight as my financial situation has changed significantly in the last 6 months. Why on Earth are most private landlords not accepting housing benefit? Or small pets? (Cats). This isn’t goig to be the solution I hoped it would be. Feeling really pissed off.

Haven’t reached for the wine though so that’s a plus.

Well done Zofloramummy. I think it’s general practice for letting agents
to state no pets etc but in reality I think there are many out there who will accept a request for one. Good luck.

Stopped at 3 quarters of a bottle to have herbal tea. So fairly proud that I didn’t empty the bottle!! Control!! 🤪

Good luck Zofloramummy x

What about them saying no housing benefit though? A huge amount of people get that, they are working but low salaries (like me).

Anyhow if I am going to sell I’ll be spending my evenings painting. That’ll keep me busy!

Zofloramummy...do have a spare room or could you make one. A friend of mine took in English language students for a while to get extra cash. Don’t know where you live if that might be an option.

Thanks canshopwillshop and tiredoftired it’s just a really tough time at the moment. And I decided to stop drinking

Well done flossie I’m on the camomile

2 bed with a 7 year old. I suppose they could sleep in the dining room!

Is there any equity in your house Zoflora?
When I separated from my boys’ dad (not XH) we sold the house and I rented, but because I then had money from the sale I wasn’t eligible for housing benefit, even though I only earned around 12k at the time.

I’m not sure what the solution is. Any scope for increasing your working hours or taking extra on the side? My SIL used to take in people’s ironing for a bit of extra cash.

Well done everyone tonight. I even survived a 9pm run to little Sainsbos and came back with Nytol, hot chocolate and packed lunch stuff - but no wine!
Another square of the BoS has also been completed.

Probably about 20k equity so not a huge amount.

Or I just cut back and power through. Difficult decision to make really and one that’ll take some (sober) thinking.

Well done everyone! I am on AF day 3 and feeling much less despondent about it. Will see how long that lasts. Not had a weekend yet. That is tough Zoflora. My instinct is don't sell up- your house is your security- but my aunt was in a similar fix and it was tough. She did end up moving (she had to as her ex wanted his share) but bought the cheapest place she could rather than renting.

20k would put you over the threshold for HB, so you’d have to spend the equity in your house on rent.
That’s not a good idea, especially if you are currently getting HB.

Other options :
Look for a better mortgage deal
Sell up and buy somewhere cheaper
Rent out your home, use the proceeds to pay your mortgage plus a bit extra to put towards renting another place
Look at a mortgage holiday, or moving to interest-only for a short time till you are better off.

You’ve probably thought of all this already - I’m sure you’ll work it out.

I can’t claim HB as I’m mortgaged, the only thing I can access is a govt loan to pay the interest on my mortgage.
Basically having lost my job in August I took a big pay drop when I started my new job. Payroll messed up my first 3 months pay and then UC sanctioned me last month due to their cockup. So I’ve been completely skint and unable to make my essential bills. It’s a mess!