Who should go to work tomorrow?

[NotSureICanDoIt]

Today was my first day at a new job - one I am very lucky to have. I probably wouldn’t find another one as good again. Not going in tomorrow will look very, very bad and potentially jeopardise my job.
DP is a GP and has a 30 patient clinic tomorrow.

DD3 is ill. Some sort of virus, fever, headache, sore throat, no appetite. There’s no way she’ll be well enough for nursery tomorrow.

DP thinks I should stay home with her and I think he should. Up until this point I’ve been a SAHM so things like this weren’t an issue. He has never ever had to cancel work before.

Who gets to go to work tomorrow?

Has he prescribed anything for her? He’s the best person to look after a sick child as a GP

Even doctors have to miss work to take care of their children. For the short-term most child responsibility is going to fall to him. Once you are a bit more established, the two of you can switch off and share the burden.

This is the third post saying that a locum who has to call in to take urgent parental leave to look after their sick child will lose work in future, and may be blacklisted in that area. This doesn't help anything and surely makes it more likely that patients will have to wait even longer to be seen. I'm disappointed but not surprised that GP practices behave in this way. No wonder the NHS is in such a state when refusing work to a locum on this basis is such a likely outcome. Hardly patient centred, is it?

So the OP should sacrifice herself, her earnings and her career because the NHS is failing? A GP is a job. They should be able to arrange cover, like in any other job.

Yes, but for someone who has cancer that is spreading while undiagnosed and the person who has plucked up the courage to make an appointment after struggling with mental health for months, he’s all they’ve got.

Lots of GP appointments are for minor things that can easily wait, but some are life changing. It should take more than a mild toddler illness for those people to be let down.

You go to work, and see if he can do any phone calls while DD sleeps?

£500 is a massive amount of money to loose!

I'd suggest we both do half a day. So you ring your boss in the morning, explain that dd is sick and ask if you can come in at lunch

Dh goes to work in the morning, sees morning clinic whilst the surgery cancels/tries to cover afternoon clinic then he comes and takes over dd

That way you both get to do some work commitments.

Nowhere I have ever worked would criticise someone ringing in on second day/first week of employment....we accept people are human and life happens.

You go to work tomorrow, ‘parent’ who thinks he’s too important to actually parent needs to step up. As an aside some of those patients would probably rather see another gp ie one who doesn’t have a sick child at home

This sounds good!

What are the chances the toddler will be fine in 1 day?

Taking 1 day of work - and explaining the father is taking the other two days show the employer that going forward that you are serious about the work and that your child has a father.
Potentially, maybe you would have a chance to arrange some care for Friday so the week would be covered?

--
Btw, the question shouldn't be "you (singular) don't have anyone able to cover a day?", it should be either you (plural) or he doesn't have anyone?

Backup care isn't the mum's responsibility.

100% you

I agree with this. You’re going to have to start as you mean to go. I was in a similar position (returning to work after being a SAHM for years) and had to push back a lot.

I’m amazed you haven’t thought of situations like this BEFORE you got a job/started work.
Children are often ill and nurseries often send them home/ refuse to have them. Sort out your childcare back up plans A,B and C as you/H can’t just stay at home every single time!!

How many other GPs are working? Only 4 or 5 patients each extra if they’re at full staffing.

The work will go to more reliable locums. That's how self employment works, you can't do the work reliably, the contract goes to someone else. It's no reflection on the NHS at all.

This

He's already the locum. The chance of getting another one for tomorrow, now, is zero. Many practices only have a couple of doctors working at a time, you can't just double their workload. The patients will be cancelled. And he is likely to be blacklisted.

You go to work

You're assuming that he's in a 7 GP practice and the other 6 can all do over an hour's extra work tomorrow?

If you search online for "last minute childcare" a number of sites come up that may be an option for you.

I had some sympathy for you until I read this. Your attitude to patients already booked is nasty. Let's hope none of those patients who may not get seen has anything seriously wrong with them.

if someone with potential cancer may not get seen and then they might wait a week for another appointment while their cancer is spreading, and they might have long term disability or die because of the delay.

No health professional should be thinking like this, it is profoundly bad for their mental and physical health. I've had managers try to pull this shit on me.

If he doesn't go to work, because his DD ill, he has the flu, his mother dies, his house burnt down, then staffing continguency plans should kick in and manage the situation. No one health care professional is solely responsible for the survival of another human based merely on their attendence or absence.

I think the same. I was ill on the second day of a new job. I did go in but was sent home. I was there well over two years.

I think his day is more important tomorrow.

But you have to work out a solution for this in future. You can potentially WFH with a sick child if they spend the day in bed or in front of Cbeebies as a one-off but you can't rely on it.

He's not allowed, she's family.

This is also a good suggestion - at least some patients would be seen and maybe some could be changed to telephone appointments.