Omg I shagged the vicar

[Lapdog78]

BC for this one!!

last summer I moved to a new village with my 2 teen DC’s following my divorce. I’ve made a real effort to integrate into village life and joined a cycling group which I love.

a couple of new members joined a few months ago, one of whom is the vicar from a nearby parish. He’s 39 single. I’m 43.

on Friday we all met for drinks snd I ended Ho inviting a group back to my house. Kids are away with their dad. We all had a few more drinks at my house before people started heading home. There’s been a little bit of flirtation between me and the vicar and it ended up just me and him- we had some more wine and he was being very complimentary and was clearly trying it on. We ended up kissing and I’m afraid that I ended up shagging him on my kitchen sofa. Very out of character for me.

im now mortified that I have to see him at cycle meet this week. My friends think it’s hilarious but im worried he’ll think I’m loose and common. 😲

This thread if real, makes him easily identifiable given there is not many unmarried male vicars of his age or even around his age.
He could be found out.
I don’t his superiors would be happy with his behaviour. Just incase you don’t realise how widespread a mumsnet thread can travel.

Not that I'm sure I believe it, but ...
OP, why are you concerned he might think you are a loose woman? FGS, he's a VICAR and has far more on the line regarding reputation. So, hold your head high woman and smile when you seem him. Be just as normal as possible.

Agreed. However this man is a vicar, that should be enough to make his devotion clear. He’s not Joe Bloggs who attends mass once a month.

Lapdog- he could get into serious trouble, even dismissed. If he’d been the GP he’d have been struck off. You shouldn’t have told anybody!

If I put a sofa in my kitchen will the vicars come?

Ugh, vicar or not, having unprotected sex with a man you barely know is risky business. He's probably got half the unmarried women in the surrounding villages in his little black book, and there goes the OP, thinking she's special.

I'm glad you've taken the MAP (you have, haven't you?). Next stop, STI testing. The man could be riddled.

I seem to remember reading something about a woman having a spontaneous orgasm in a theatre?

@Lapdog78 The more you post OP - and it's clearly amusing- the less I'm inclined to think this really happened.

If you were genuinely embarrassed you would not broadcast it.
Just think- how many villages have a cycling club with a 39 year old local vicar from a nearby parish in it?

How many other cycling members may be on MN or know someone who is?

Love this! Go you!!!

The comment about rawdogging sealed it for me. That's not a phrase a divorced woman in her 40s would use, is it?

Yep, vile phrase.
I highly doubt that this is more than a fantasy or else the Church of England needs to have a word with their Vicar’s about standards.
If it is true, surely the entire county knows by now. He was foolish.

Let's see if this ends up in the Paper that Supported the Blackshirts.

What a load of old nonsense.

Cycling club?

The vicar has WhatsApp you to apologise for spunking on your sofa!?

Well well well. This is very 2026.

I would love to know the exact wording of his message. Surely the vicar didn’t say spunk? Or jizz? Or even cum sounds rude coming (sorry!) from a vicar.

Cycling clubs do exist but as for the rest of the story....

Stick with Jilly Cooper!

I do. In the early 80s our minister (married, Methodist) had an affair with a (married) parishioner. Not long after she found she was pregnant with her 4th…

Sadly I think you went a step too far with this jizzy/psalmy tale. He did not WA you to apologise for spunking on your sofa,cum on 🤣

This cracked me up! Good for you OP, sounds a wonderful evening, not at all jealous…. 🤣

Is this a sofa with loose covers?
If they are LOOSE he doesn't need worry.

Tmi but hilarious! Seriously though, he might be a bit of a slut, be careful and dont do it again without the condom

I really hope this is true as it has cheered me up no end.

Who in god's name has a sofa in the kitchen?

No wonder he sprinkled it with holy water.

Goddamn it,that hadn't occurred to me 🤣Let us pray they are indeed removeable and can be whacked in the washing machine

😂😂😂😂👏👏👏

Has he sprinkled his holy waters on any others of his flock?