Nothing like a teenage daughter to keep you humbled…

[JamieOliverPetrolStation]

I leaned into the culottes and polka dot trend this season and was delighted with this bargain in Sainsburys last week. I thought I looked great. Effortless and summery chic etc etc. Until 14yo DD looked up at me with withering disdain and asked why was I dressed like a Tombliboo.

We had a similar situation last year when I bought a striped teeshirt and they called me Bagpuss for the whole summer.

My daughter has had some lovely ones. Not as a teen (now she just raises one eyebrow and says “Really?”)

But age 6 she was watching me get ready to go out and asked why I was taking so long. I said I was going out with friends and wanted to look nice.
”Oh. Why? Is it so they don’t recognise you when you go in and you can surprise them?”
And in a similar vein “You look pretty. Not like normal. But don’t worry - I still love you Mummy.”

Children are brutal.

A Tombliboo.. 🤣🤣🤣🤣
They are kind of cute though… 🤣

DS said my new cashmere wrap looks great because it makes me look like John the Baptist.

My summery long floaty dress also did not go as I had planned when I got asked had I lost my sheep somewhere. How do we raise these evil swines?

Haha kids 😂 I recently bought a head scarf that I thought complemented an outfit. DH asked me if I was off to milk some cows 🤦‍♀️ still wore it though..!

I have just remembered a conversation with DD1 aged 14 which went:

Me: Do you like this tshirt?
Her: No. Its rank. Wait, do you mean for me or you?
Me: Well I was thinking for me but if it’s that bad…
Her: It’ll be fine for you though.

Thanks. I didn’t get it.

DD 11 told me my dress from never fully dressed was giving playroom 😧

Boys can be just as bad!!!

I brought a long pink puffa coat.

ive never had a long coat before and asked DS what he thought.

“I love it. You look like super worm and you know how much I loved Julia Donaldson books” 🤷‍♀️

He was 19 at the time 🤣

Tbf, OP, if an outfit does nothing for the model you can be pretty certain it won't do much for you. And that outfit certainly does the model no favours

Kids are harsh. I was looking at dungarees yesterday, in Lucy & Yak. I held a pair up to me, no intention of buying as I knew what my friend would say, before she could, a teenager comments ‘ooh look, Andy Pandy’.

I feel your pain. FWIW I thought the polka dots outfit is very nice.

I bought a lovely (so I thought) pinafore dress and my daughter asked why I wanted to look like an overgrown toddler

This did give me a chuckle. 🙈
bagpuss!

My 4 year old granddaughter’ I like your dress nanny ( as she is touching it) it’s made out of rough stuff. ( tbh it was from Temu and only to wear at home ) share.temu.com/8CRh5PnRJOB

@JamieOliverPetrolStation I need to know the context behind your username.

(outfit sounds really nice btw!)

It never ends. My six year old granddaughter is now critiquing my outfits. 🤣

My son (24) tells me I don’t dress like other mums. I think it’s a compliment 🤷🏻‍♀️

My dear child said I look like "a Guinness shit" compared to them (they dress very colourfully and brightly, I wear 98% black) and "a drag king football manager" (buttoned polo neck t shirt). So harsh 😂

Seperately I have also been compared to; the shape of a post box, a dog trainer (?!), a crunchy mom (Birkenstocks related) and a "counterculture supply teacher". Love them really..

I wasn’t sure if my adidas dress was too young for me and asked DD “don’t worry mum, it’s fine, no one young would ever wear that”

This made me howl!! Kids are brutal 🤣🤣🤣

I didn't order a dress online because my daughter (22, not teen) said the pattern looked like a Wetherspoons plate.

Please, please, please op can you tell us all what this means? 🤣🤣🤣

Dd (years ago) told me that 'all your clothes are crap' and 'and old lady wouldn't be seen dead in those rags'

A few days later,I was walking through tesco and saw myself walking towards me

They may have been 'crap' but that didn't stop her from going through my wardrobe and helping herself as she hadn't done any washing and had ran out of clean clothes

I'll take a teenager over my dp anyday

I once bought a pale pink dress with cream spots-he told me I look like 'Mr blobbys nanna'

Another time i was hoovering up (wearing a short skirt and slightly heeled shoes)

'You look like Freddie Mercury in the 'i want to break free video',with that skirt and your tash,your a dead ringer for him!'

'Your tash'

I came down one day wearing one of those jumper over a shirt tops

He proudly told me I looked like 'a posh,lesbian riding woman' (????)

I bought a red,gingham,halter necked dress

He came home and asked why I'd bought a tablecloth

I bought a red,white and blue 50's style dress on vinted

He told me I looked like a cross between the American flag and Minnie mouse

Loads more but i cant be arsed to check fb (when ever he says anything i write it on there for the lolz) I never let him live these down but he's adamant he's not wrong

On the plus side,if he says I look nice,I know he genuinely means it

I bought a pair of denim Bermuda shorts and every time I wear them DD sings 'look at me in my jorts' at me. Apparently there is a distinction between denim shorts (acceptable) and jorts (unacceptable) and mine fall on the jorts end of the spectrum.
She always holds special disdain for my favourite Birkenstocks so of course I must wear both together to take her anywhere now.

To be fair… she’s not incorrect about those pants

I stopped wearing sleeveless dresses after my (normally kind) child told me I looked like a cave woman!