Ye Olde Worlde Mumsnette

[Sharrilanda]

Share some historical MN dilemmas and stories.
What kind of posts do you think we would be reading if MN was around in the good old days of yore?

Thou art a thriftie housewyfe and no misteake! I doff my bonnet at thee.

Am l being unreasoable to have sex on a Sunday?

Why, there thou hast it. Naught's worse than naughty verse.

I had hoped ye gossip about thine priest was all falsehoods. HWBU to not let you off tempting him into sin (by being a woman within his gaze) with a dozen Hail Marys.

And some of the stories be but filth and lewdness and not suitable for the ears of anyone, let alone men of the cloth and ladies...

Tis true. In myne girlhood, I suffered a nightmayre wherein lads and lasses of an age to be working in the fields were compelled to read(!) this lewd verse (yclept Ye Nunnes' Priests' Tale) and then wryte about it, in language passing strange, like yet unlike good Englishe.

But l always do it with my eyes shut!

< Gasps and clutches onyx in horrore >

Why thy is indeede a wanton hussy!
Hang thy head in shame and repent ye sinner!

ETA - the olde worlde tinternette haffe forsaken us and gone up the Swanee! 🙄

'Twas wickedness. What good is wryting to thee, when thou shouldn't be at thy rightful work?

Young folk these days... what's wrong with a good Passion Play if thou wants wholesome entertainment?

One does not 'have sex'. Sex is something done unto thee as a necessary for childbearing. But thou wilt labour in pain as punishment anyway.

(A mischievous monk appeareth to correct some of mine writings, for he misunderstandeth my spellings...)

Young folk these days... what's wrong with a good Passion Play if thou wants wholesome entertainment?

Methinks the childer did not find entertainment in Ye Nunnes' Priests' Tale - mayhap it was penance?

I believe that my neighbour is a wanton woman who is no better than she she should be. She hath placed a candle in her window behynd a scarlet shade so that the light shineth onto the cobbles of the harbour outside her dwelling. Many men - some gentleman, some workers, some travellers from foreign climes- do call upon her day and night. She answers the door in a dress so indecent that her breasts are barely contained therein. She always hath a full purse to avail herself of hollands gin from the tavern despite her husbande having been dead and buried for more than a twelve month.

Pray Sisters of the Mumsnette Brethren, shareth thy expertise with this here merchant 'MERKINS R US'.
Perchance haffe ordered from him?
Thy am in the market for a replacemente as the olde one haffe been purloined by myne own rapscallion offspringe for use of facial bearde for forthcoming schoole nativity...
< Copulation Myne Lyfe >

Is that how those babies got in there? I thought it was something in the water.

These Frenche are not to be trusted and ugly to boot. The captive is for certain a spy and should be tortured and hanged.

Has anyone tried one of those new book things instead of a scroll? Do they really work?

DH wants to go up the hanging tonight but I was so looking forward to the witch on the ducking stool, AIBU to just go anyway?

.

@StarlightLady hath the devil taken your tongue? Thou art very quiet.

Tis witchcrafte.

[Apologies for spoiling the flow of an excellent thread. I posted in duplicate in error.]

Aaah! Thou speaketh! The hex has been lyfted.
Praise be.

l’ve told my DD (17) that she can’t go to the well wearing a skirt that shows her ankles. AIBU?

Art thou sure twas not the work of thy evil familiar?

I dost not think that thou should harlot shame thine daughter. Many are the girls who have adopted this to us outrageous fashion. As long as her hair remaineth covered, thou hast nothing to worry about.

Moveth with ye times, Mistress @StarlightLady