Ugly

[Shithole101]

Just that really. People probably know I have been posting about my house . And that's getting there which is great. I can fix that .

But I can't do anything about being Ugley. This is not just me saying it ok truly ugly. I know my children love me. But I should think they are embarrassed by me. I'm embarrassed about myself so they must feel that way to.

I have a mix of white and mousey hair which Is frizzy. I have freckles , my chins cover a good part of my neck. I have frown lines between my eye brows . I frown in my sleep. Most of my teeth are missing. I'm fat . I don't look after myself as I should because I think what's the point. I have not bedn tk the hair dresser in over 10 years . Because I feel like what's the point of nice hair if i have an ugly face.

I forgot what else I was going to say

I don't know what to say. 💐

I am 5ft 6 and weighed 14,1 in September - obese - same as you - my hair is also an issue - I have found that Dove shampoo and conditioner tames it a bit though and best of all is at the cheaper end of products
I started going to Slimming World in September and this week am 11,4.5 - still classed as overweight but ....

So you are now just over 11 stone?

It's generally called The curly girl method, you just need to find the one that may suit you the best according to the maintenance you want to do.

Thank you. I will have a flick through

Get a meditation app and listen to 'self compassion' and 'loving- kindness' on repeat until it starts to sink in.

Look at nature. The tree is not ugly no matter how young or old, fresh leaves or just branches. It just is, and that's enough. You're a living thing just like that tree. Your cells are doing amazing job every day - (read about cells and biochemistry!)- they don't care about your hair. You're walking, talking, living nature.

Well done on getting the house renovated.

And because non fiction books help me when I'm sad I'll recommend 'the ultra processed people' book - it may or may not help with your weight, but it should distract you from the way you feel for a bit. Distraction is good!

Thank you. I don't/can't read books though. Time I'm down the bottom of the page I forget what I have read. It doesn't sink in.

You can get products called CoWash which are kind of a shampoo and conditioner in one. They can be really good for frizziness. And you just use it like a normal shampoo so not time consuming.
Ugliness is inside a person and you always come across as a good person. The room transformations have been incredible. Your energy to change things is impressive.
Many people dealing with things you have to deal with would have given up, but you keep pushing forwards. Not every day but that's okay.
Some days you push forwards...some days you slow down and take stock....and some days you stand still for a while and catch your breath.
The speed doesn't matter. The direction is what's important and you keep going.
I always read your threads to see where you are up to. You constantly impress me.

Thank you. I will look at co wash . Amd thank you for being kind 💐

Is argan oil hydrating hair mask any good . Its cheap stuff. As in cost 1.00 . I just found it in the bathroom

Yes it will add moisture into your hair, give it a go when you have chance.
My hair simply refuses to grow beyond shoulder level so your hair length is lovely .

That's as long as mine gets. I have a bit at the front that does not grow its an inch or 2 long. My adult dd will only grow to shoulder level but it's pretty thick. Teen dd has lovely straight lower back hair.

I just used the argan oil. It's only cheap probably won't do much . Least I washed my hair though.

I'm going to take the kids to the cinema tomorrow. I need to get then out. I should do more with them really. It's hard when there's an age gap to. They do alot with their dad 😔

Well done with the argan oil, and have fun tomorrow.

I have never seen anyone and thought they were ugly. You're too hard on yourself op.

You can however, focus on health as when you're healthy, you'll look healthy and that's quite attractive.

Enough sleep, daily walking/exercise, lots of fruit, veg and protein and less of the crap, lots of water
Take some vit d and a good multi vit, moisturise your skin and hair (oils, leave in conditioner), eyebrows and deal with teeth.

You'll be healthy and glowing in no time.

Geez, Louise. One simple thing you can do is whack on some hair colour from the supermarket and start using a different conditioner. Nobody looks good with their white roots showing. Or whack on some henna to add colour and shine.

Do you use conditioner?

Yes but I don't wash /look after it like I should.

How often do you wash it?
A good shampoo and conditioner will improve it massively.

Why not?

I was going weeks without washing it . But im trying to change it. I washed it twice over the past week. I'm going out later so I will see if I can look at some better shampoos/conditioners

That would have been a reply to what someone else said so I would have to go back and look for what I was replying to

Washing it regularly with a good shampoo and conditioner will help.
Try Aussie 3 minute miracle conditioner.
A good cut to get all the dead crap off the ends will improve it too.

I was thinking that maybe it would be a good idea not to dye your hair op. I think it could make you look better short term and that would give you a boost, but within a few of weeks you'll have white roots showing aand it'll just need done again.
It doesn't sound like you have the energy to keep on top of that kind of maintenance. I'm worried you'll feel like you're failing again when the roots come through and you haven't redyed it yet.

The white hair you have is a lovely colour and there's quite a lot of it so maybe it would be nicer to just clip your hair back for now and leave the white to grow out some more. Then when you are up to it in the future have a good trim. (Do you feel up to cuting the ends yourself?) In the meantime just try washing/conditioning or co-washing with a product that you like the smell of so feels enjoyable to use.
If something gives us pleasure then we are more likely to do it again. Remember small and easy steps.