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Original poster

I'm scared

450 replies

Underthesea65 · 03/02/2024 17:51

I know there's no magical answer but I just need to get my thoughts out. Sorry. I'm terminally ill. I'm 38 with an amazing DH, one adult daughter and one nearly adult daughter (19 and 17). I've just spent three weeks in hospital getting blood transfusions and iron infusions and currently I head to the emergency day procedure every three days for more. I have scope tests amd another procedure next Sunday. I'm in agonising pain, even with the highest dose morphine. I can do nothing for myself. I can't stop crying. I know there's people in far worse positions than me but I'm just struggling so badly at the moment. I know this thread is completely pointless to everyone reading it, but I just needed to vent, sorry

OP posts:
Thread gallery
12
Lampslights · 17/02/2024 09:53

Hey op, just popping in to say hi, how are you, do you get any sleep?x

Original poster
Underthesea65 · 17/02/2024 11:11

Tilllly · 17/02/2024 04:34

She's 9 weeks old and full of mischief

I'm typing this under the covers so she doesn't see I'm awake!!!

She's absolutely gorgeous. We have a daisy too. But she's 15 and honestly such a psycho lol

OP posts:
Original poster
Underthesea65 · 17/02/2024 11:12

Helplessandheartbroke · 17/02/2024 09:48

@Lwrenn that made me chuckle! Bless him. How are you today op? Hope you managed some sleep. @Tilllly daisy is gorgeous. We lost our pooch just before Xmas it broke my heart x

I'm so sorry you lost your doggy. It's so hard 😫
I had a really rough night and just feeling awful. I need to try and muster some strength for a shower, but it's difficult

OP posts:
Original poster
Underthesea65 · 17/02/2024 11:13

Lampslights · 17/02/2024 09:53

Hey op, just popping in to say hi, how are you, do you get any sleep?x

No sleep unfortunately. Now I'm struggling but in a giddy mood with lack of sleep 🤣😂

OP posts:
Helplessandheartbroke · 17/02/2024 14:50

Thanks op. Can you have a nice hot relaxing bubble bath and a nap? X

PBandJ111 · 17/02/2024 15:04

Just started reading this thread today. I think you’re very brave actually. Have you listened to some of those YouTube videos which say you’ll fall asleep in 10 minutes?

DBSFstupid · 18/02/2024 13:59

Just wishing you some nice, gentle moments today OP. Thinking of you xx

Teasie123 · 19/02/2024 10:40

Still here. And still thinking of you, sending you strength, love and peace
🤗🤗🤗

Sparklyhat · 19/02/2024 12:35

Just checking in to say we're still here and thinking of you, wishing you a pain free day 🤗

Original poster
Underthesea65 · 19/02/2024 14:11

Hi all, just home from hospital. Took really bad and needed some scans and stuff done
I'm home with lots of new gadgets etc and I'm going to go for a sleep as I'm so tired. Thank you all for checking in on me. Honestly, you will have no idea how much it means to me. You are all angels. Thank you 💖💖

OP posts:
Teasie123 · 19/02/2024 14:14

@Underthesea65 , u sleep as much as you want missus. Am glad to hear Ur home with Ur hubby and family too.🤗🤗🤗

Original poster
Underthesea65 · 19/02/2024 14:18

Teasie123 · 19/02/2024 14:14

@Underthesea65 , u sleep as much as you want missus. Am glad to hear Ur home with Ur hubby and family too.🤗🤗🤗

Thankyou sweetheart. So glad to be back home but I've started being violently sick 🤢. Not in the mood for this today 🤣😂

OP posts:
christmascalypso · 19/02/2024 14:19

I haven't messaged before as I couldn't think what to say but have been checking daily to see how you are. Your thread has really touched me and I am so sorry for everything you are going through. I hope your pain is under control as that is something that should be a priority. Hope you manage to get some sleep 🤞🤞

Original poster
Underthesea65 · 19/02/2024 14:20

christmascalypso · 19/02/2024 14:19

I haven't messaged before as I couldn't think what to say but have been checking daily to see how you are. Your thread has really touched me and I am so sorry for everything you are going through. I hope your pain is under control as that is something that should be a priority. Hope you manage to get some sleep 🤞🤞

Thank you so much. Your message means so much to me, so thank you for taking the time to do it. 💖💖

OP posts:
Teasie123 · 19/02/2024 14:20

@Underthesea65 , ginger ale is good or do you have anti sickness tablets? They should help.🤗🤗🤗

Original poster
Underthesea65 · 19/02/2024 14:22

Teasie123 · 19/02/2024 14:20

@Underthesea65 , ginger ale is good or do you have anti sickness tablets? They should help.🤗🤗🤗

Yeh I have a plethora 😂🤣. It's like a blooming pharmacy here.

OP posts:
Original poster
Underthesea65 · 19/02/2024 14:24

Teasie123 · 19/02/2024 14:20

@Underthesea65 , ginger ale is good or do you have anti sickness tablets? They should help.🤗🤗🤗

Btw, I've pm'd you. Hope you don't mind xx

OP posts:
Teasie123 · 19/02/2024 14:30

@Underthesea65 I don't mind at all missus!🤗🤗🤗

christmascalypso · 19/02/2024 14:31

@Underthesea65 Thank you for your lovely words 🤗😘

Lwrenn · 19/02/2024 16:16

@Underthesea65 have they given you ondansetron? Get that, cyclizine and prednisolone to boost them if they'll let you! Ginger may help with queasy as teasie says but kick off for big guns! And if you ever feel you cba advocating for things I'll ring your GP and tell them to sort it before I pop a cap in someone's ass. (Not even sure what that means, but it gets results on telly!)

I hope this wee little tale of my ridiculous bloody day amuses you - so some lass out the park today recognised me, (I don't live where I went to school BTW so never see anyone) And she was like, "Lauren? Omg its Lauren!" And I didn't have a fucking clue who she was, (side note, I've used my middle name mostly since we moved because I suit it more than Lauren, I just use Lauren on here from the lwren spelling!) Anyway we chatted, awkwardly hugged, I bought her adorable wee lad an ice cream from the van when I got my hooligans one, agreed it would be lovely to meet up for a coffee.
Say bye, get in the car and dp says, "how did you know that lady?" Didn't have a fucking scooby do how I knew her. Not a clue, we pulls into our road and I'm like, "Oh fuck me! I remember now! She bullied me in primary school!" 🤣🙈

DP is buzzing his wee tits off it, I'm going for coffee with the same person who used to tell everyone I had snotty hands 😂

Tilllly · 19/02/2024 21:32

@Lwrenn

Make her buy the coffee. And cake

DBSFstupid · 19/02/2024 22:35

Hope you are managing to rest now without any pain xx

Teasie123 · 21/02/2024 16:51

@Underthesea65 , hope uv had a good day today missus.🤗🤗🤗

Lwrenn · 22/02/2024 06:24

Hey everyone, how have we been? How's @Underthesea65 you hen? Any good sleep? Sending you love ❤

And if you want, let me know, I'll send memes!

Teasie123 · 23/02/2024 18:33

@Underthesea65 , missus, I understand if Ur tired or sore. If I feel up to posting, even a thumbs up to let us know Ur ok 🤗🤗🤗