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Original poster

Mumsnet "stalkers"

200 replies

QuertyGirl · 08/04/2023 08:50

Possibly too strong a word but not sure how else to describe it.

Basically where people follow certain posters about. I've had it a few times and always someone has an axe to grind, often degrading into petty insults.

I ignore them obviously.

Is there a name for this type of behaviour? Should it be reported?

OP posts:
TremulousD · 08/04/2023 23:16

Well this took a bit of a turn

RufustheSpeculatingreindeer · 08/04/2023 23:17

I don’t think

’ive met someone on mumsnet’ is a wild claim 😀

im sure lots of us know one or two people on here

but again , I agree that generally you can’t tell for sure that people are telling the truth…people lie about all sorts of weird things

RedDirtWildChild · 08/04/2023 23:18

JKTrolling · 08/04/2023 23:13

We’ll just have to take you at your word that you know some random women from an internet forum.

It’s so easy to make wild claims on the internet when you have no way of backing yourself up.

Don’t worry. I’m off to name change so you can’t stalk me Confused

Show quote history

I didn’t say I expected you to believe me, just that I know the women I mentioned. I think you need to read back posts.

Happy name changing. May JKisamazing or something similar would be a good one. She is amazing. 😊

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Families
RufustheSpeculatingreindeer · 08/04/2023 23:19

I haven’t been stalked as such but there was one poster who, if we happened to be on the same thread, would have a pop at me

i took to checking if they were on a thread before I posted….I checked so many times that even now if i type the first three letters of their name it comes up on my ipad

JKTrolling · 08/04/2023 23:23

RedDirtWildChild · 08/04/2023 23:18

I didn’t say I expected you to believe me, just that I know the women I mentioned. I think you need to read back posts.

Happy name changing. May JKisamazing or something similar would be a good one. She is amazing. 😊

Show quote history

You’re not doing much to show your genuine if you don’t even expect people to believe what you say 🤣🤣🤣

I don’t think you need to be telling women what to do. We’re not all infantile Confused

RedDirtWildChild · 08/04/2023 23:27

JKTrolling · 08/04/2023 23:23

You’re not doing much to show your genuine if you don’t even expect people to believe what you say 🤣🤣🤣

I don’t think you need to be telling women what to do. We’re not all infantile Confused

Show quote history

See my earlier posts. I don’t believe much on here. I don’t expect people to believe me, their choice. Why would I care when most don’t know who I am?

I didn’t tell anyone what to do, just made a suggestion of a great username. There’s a difference even if you don’t understand that. 😊

Inamechangedforthis23 · 08/04/2023 23:29

I was tempted to be a stalker I recognised the OW on here, she was talking about our DD and their baby that was on the way and a very specific family set up, it was interesting to hear her side of the story and I was tempted try and get more info out of her!

Mumtobabyhavoc · 08/04/2023 23:36

RedDirtWildChild · 08/04/2023 23:27

See my earlier posts. I don’t believe much on here. I don’t expect people to believe me, their choice. Why would I care when most don’t know who I am?

I didn’t tell anyone what to do, just made a suggestion of a great username. There’s a difference even if you don’t understand that. 😊

Show quote history

Ahhh @RedDirtWildChild do you not see the user name of the person you are having an argument with? @JKTrolling
🤦‍♀️

reddirt 0
jktroll 1

🤷‍♀️

JKTrolling · 08/04/2023 23:37

RedDirtWildChild · 08/04/2023 23:27

See my earlier posts. I don’t believe much on here. I don’t expect people to believe me, their choice. Why would I care when most don’t know who I am?

I didn’t tell anyone what to do, just made a suggestion of a great username. There’s a difference even if you don’t understand that. 😊

Show quote history

You told me I ‘need to read back’. Now you’re claiming you didn’t. Even you are better than that.

You seem fixated on my username. I’m a JK supporter. My name is satire (look it up) about they was she has been treated.

I appreciate your paranoid about women having opinions that might differ to yours or upset your ‘famous’ friends. Maybe the only ‘feminism’ you understand is talking on internet forums with your mum friends. But many of us were out there, before the internet, fighting for women. Adult human females if you are confused.

I appreciate by hijacking this thread about stalkers (ironic I know) you feel you have fought for women. But it might be more meaningful to do something in real life. I’ve just implemented a single sex bathroom policy within my ‘woke’ employer. What have you done?

RedDirtWildChild · 08/04/2023 23:45

JKTrolling · 08/04/2023 23:37

You told me I ‘need to read back’. Now you’re claiming you didn’t. Even you are better than that.

You seem fixated on my username. I’m a JK supporter. My name is satire (look it up) about they was she has been treated.

I appreciate your paranoid about women having opinions that might differ to yours or upset your ‘famous’ friends. Maybe the only ‘feminism’ you understand is talking on internet forums with your mum friends. But many of us were out there, before the internet, fighting for women. Adult human females if you are confused.

I appreciate by hijacking this thread about stalkers (ironic I know) you feel you have fought for women. But it might be more meaningful to do something in real life. I’ve just implemented a single sex bathroom policy within my ‘woke’ employer. What have you done?

Show quote history

😬 Have a nice BH weekend.

RedDirtWildChild · 08/04/2023 23:49

Mumtobabyhavoc · 08/04/2023 23:36

Ahhh @RedDirtWildChild do you not see the user name of the person you are having an argument with? @JKTrolling
🤦‍♀️

reddirt 0
jktroll 1

🤷‍♀️

Show quote history

No arguing from me, the poster seems to be arguing with themselves. 😊

JKTrolling · 08/04/2023 23:50

RedDirtWildChild · 08/04/2023 23:49

No arguing from me, the poster seems to be arguing with themselves. 😊

Show quote history

How so?

Catwithbigfeet · 08/04/2023 23:58

Name change usually protects against that

ApplesandPares · 09/04/2023 00:35

TremulousD · 08/04/2023 23:16

Well this took a bit of a turn

More of an ever decreasing circle of confusion which seems purposeful at times.

SNAFUED · 09/04/2023 00:40

JKTrolling · 08/04/2023 23:37

You told me I ‘need to read back’. Now you’re claiming you didn’t. Even you are better than that.

You seem fixated on my username. I’m a JK supporter. My name is satire (look it up) about they was she has been treated.

I appreciate your paranoid about women having opinions that might differ to yours or upset your ‘famous’ friends. Maybe the only ‘feminism’ you understand is talking on internet forums with your mum friends. But many of us were out there, before the internet, fighting for women. Adult human females if you are confused.

I appreciate by hijacking this thread about stalkers (ironic I know) you feel you have fought for women. But it might be more meaningful to do something in real life. I’ve just implemented a single sex bathroom policy within my ‘woke’ employer. What have you done?

Show quote history

I don’t think it’s that poster that’s showing signs of paranoia. Jesus.

I quite like the AS function, saves wasting time on things that seem like total bullshit but I’d report rather than put anything on a thread.

hoomelle · 09/04/2023 01:06

gkd1234 · 08/04/2023 08:56

I change my username all the time to avoid them.

I do the same. I have some well known usernames and lots of anonymous names.

I'd really like an hide poster function, as I do ignore the axe grinders and trolls but I'd rather not see them.

MysteryBelle · 09/04/2023 01:31

Yes I’ve been stalked and followed to other threads a few times. And creepy is exactly the word for it. Glad I don’t know them irl.

TempletonTheRat · 09/04/2023 01:40

hattie43 · 08/04/2023 08:54

Don't know about stalkers but the ones I think really creepy are those who trawl through a posters back threads trying to get more ammunition for their argument. I mean really who could be bothered . Some people are just too invested .

Yes! 100% I've learned to name change now very frequently. There have been far too many times I've posted and some psycho MN'er has trawled through previous posts looking for ammunition or a inconsistencies in my posts.

Like others have also said, if I do post about personal things I'll often change small details like ages, genders, number of people etc that don't really have an effect on the topic, but make a situation slightly less identifiable.

I've also been accused of being a troll and a journalist more times than I can count. It's such bloody odd behaviour. I've really had to grow a thick skin from being on MN. There are some vile human beings on this site it's honestly mind boggling how some of them think and behave.

LighterNights · 09/04/2023 01:54

I change my name every couple of months. I once had someone bring up a previous name as she'd linked something I said back to something I'd said previously. Freaked me out, sad cow! I never even read the poster names, just the comments.

Cyclingbanana · 09/04/2023 03:21

Butitsnotfunnyisititsserious · 08/04/2023 18:52

But that would involve critical thinking, a concept foreign to many MNers.

Ahh good point.

Indeed.
I am a teacher but do not slavishly agree with every pronouncement of the —prolix— prolific posters on those threads and was bullied for posting mild disagreements with them. And have been told that I can’t be a teacher and not assume all teachers are saints.
Three in particular was not only unnecessarily aggressive but also made pointed remarks to each other about something I had posted on an entirely unrelated thread previously relating to upsetting behaviour by my exh along the lines of ‘unsurprising her domestic life is a mess etc’
Had clearly dug around for that.
Deeply unpleasant.

Westpoint · 09/04/2023 03:59

OMG, this is nothing.

I used to be a member of a user run forum quite a few years ago (AWF, cough, cough) and we had a member who seemed to make it her life's work to literally track down people in real life. Stalk their other social media and post real details about them, their name and all sorts.

It was really disturbing!

Strangest thing was most people just let it go. It was a user led forum after all and so difficult to moderate I guess but she really was a nasty piece of work.

namrchage · 09/04/2023 04:19

we had a member who seemed to make it her life's work to literally track down people in real life. Stalk their other social media and post real details about them, their name and all sorts.

Same from another forum. A woman's social media was found and linked, and her physical appearance and home was ridiculed.

Another one was tracked over here I think.

BlackBarbies · 09/04/2023 08:06

I use the advanced search when an OP isn't quite adding up to me.

Are you MI5?😂 I don’t understand these sort of comments because is Mumsnet paying you to go through peoples posts in hope to try and catch them out? I find that so weird.

If something seems weird or dodgy, I just go on another thread. Who has the time to be doing all of this investigating?

I clearly don’t use MN the way that others do because I only recognise about 2/3 usernames. I don’t know if their a maths teacher or what sort of opinions they hold. I didn’t even think people look at peoples usernames. I just look at what’s posted and that’s it

DancingDrunk · 09/04/2023 14:10

BlackBarbies · 09/04/2023 08:06

I use the advanced search when an OP isn't quite adding up to me.

Are you MI5?😂 I don’t understand these sort of comments because is Mumsnet paying you to go through peoples posts in hope to try and catch them out? I find that so weird.

If something seems weird or dodgy, I just go on another thread. Who has the time to be doing all of this investigating?

I clearly don’t use MN the way that others do because I only recognise about 2/3 usernames. I don’t know if their a maths teacher or what sort of opinions they hold. I didn’t even think people look at peoples usernames. I just look at what’s posted and that’s it

If they’re on mumsnet, they’re not busy, so to ask who has time, lots of people seemingly.

Mumsnet provide the search function so they know it’s used and if people are going to make things up to the point of terminal illnesses for children and similarly awful things, it’s understandable that people will use it if they get an odd feeling from the thread.

PriamFarrl · 09/04/2023 14:14

hattie43 · 08/04/2023 08:54

Don't know about stalkers but the ones I think really creepy are those who trawl through a posters back threads trying to get more ammunition for their argument. I mean really who could be bothered . Some people are just too invested .

I think that in some situations that is valid.

If someone says ‘I’m a teacher and I know for a fact that’s this is not the case in schools’ but then on the next thread ‘I’m a doctor and I can say this would never happen in a hospital,’ then they need pulling up on that because they are making shit up.