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Original poster

Mumsnet "stalkers"

200 replies

QuertyGirl · 08/04/2023 08:50

Possibly too strong a word but not sure how else to describe it.

Basically where people follow certain posters about. I've had it a few times and always someone has an axe to grind, often degrading into petty insults.

I ignore them obviously.

Is there a name for this type of behaviour? Should it be reported?

OP posts:
Original poster
QuertyGirl · 08/04/2023 19:00

Hotcrossed · 08/04/2023 18:58

@RedDirtWildChild
i often wonder how on earth these so called professionals get the time to go on MN so much during the day

Why wouldn't we?

Many professionals manage their own time

OP posts:
Original poster
QuertyGirl · 08/04/2023 19:01

Jonei · 08/04/2023 18:58

I mean, I even remember stuff you've said in the past QuertyGirl. Unusual username again. No stalking required. Am I supposed to entirely forget those things and pretend people are entirely new posters every single time. Seems weird.

I can't recall you at all, sorry.

OP posts:
Nimbostratus100 · 08/04/2023 19:03

QuertyGirl · 08/04/2023 18:50

@Florissant

What exactly did she get wrong?

I didn't get anything wrong!

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Families
Nimbostratus100 · 08/04/2023 19:04

Hotcrossed · 08/04/2023 18:51

why have your brought your disagreement here?
please stop

I haven't attacked anybody 😂

Original poster
QuertyGirl · 08/04/2023 19:04

People are weird.

I've had people flat out refuse to believe what I did for a living at the time.

OP posts:
Jonei · 08/04/2023 19:05

QuertyGirl · 08/04/2023 19:01

I can't recall you at all, sorry.

Show quote history

That's probably a good thing. I won't be so rude as to say why 😂

Florissant · 08/04/2023 19:05

Dodgeitornot · 08/04/2023 19:00

I'm always confused now people even do it. How do you check someone's previous posts?

My guess would be by using the search function.

Nimbostratus100 · 08/04/2023 19:07

Hotcrossed · 08/04/2023 18:58

@RedDirtWildChild
i often wonder how on earth these so called professionals get the time to go on MN so much during the day

maybe becasue \i am stuck in bed recovering from my forth major operation for cancer in the last 9 months? Maybe @Florissant would like me to post a picture of my scars to check for authenticity?

RedDirtWildChild · 08/04/2023 19:09

QuertyGirl · 08/04/2023 19:04

People are weird.

I've had people flat out refuse to believe what I did for a living at the time.

Why would they believe a person online though? People lie about their children dying or having cancer, so I’m sure they lie about jobs. Why would you care if they don’t believe you anyway?

Hotcrossed · 08/04/2023 19:10

and you can change your name on each thread, i have just discovered,
which is Marvellous Wink

Jonei · 08/04/2023 19:10

It is weird that people expect you to believe them.

Saschka · 08/04/2023 19:11

Kissedbyfire1 · 08/04/2023 13:00

Twice I have been followed around the boards by people/person who changed their username (not this one) to one that was identical to mine aside from one letter - so for example changing an O to a 0. It was obvious because the name was something personal to me in my life, not possible for it to be a coincidence. The stalker didn’t do anything except post immediately after I posted on whatever thread I happened to be on, so it looked at first glance as if I had posted twice. It’s very odd behaviour and I namechange reasonably often as a result.
I have also been outed by saying what my husband does for a living. He has a very unusual job in a particular sector and once when I mentioned it (on a topic and thread to which it was relevant) I immediately was messaged by someone telling me “I know who you are”. Again, completely unnecessary. I stay away from that topic now.

Yep somebody did that to me too (different username - and no it wasn’t me doing it to you!)

To the extent that people accused me of having a name change fail, or arguing with myself. Which was presumably the intention. So I namechanged, and so far the weirdo seems to have moved onto harassing somebody else.

I also made the mistake of answering a question on something which falls directly within my professional expertise, and in doing so contradicted that area of the site’s self-appointed Expert Parent, and yep she then followed me about like a lunatic, picking fights on everything from weaning advice to nice places to visit with kids in London. Again, I namechanged and the problem went away.

I namechange about every 6-12 months now, and my experience of the site is much better.

RedDirtWildChild · 08/04/2023 19:13

And the more detail and explanations people give, the less I’m likely to believe them. Liars generally give more detail.

thebaneofmylifeisacat · 08/04/2023 19:13

Been here 20 years it was ever thus!

I just ignore

you post what you post and fuck them!

Original poster
QuertyGirl · 08/04/2023 19:13

@RedDirtWildChild

This was in real life.

It's a mixture of jealousy and snobbery (I have a strong, regional accent)

OP posts:
Hotcrossed · 08/04/2023 19:15

ha ha we dont know your accent, @QuertyGirl
do you mean in RL?

Hotcrossed · 08/04/2023 19:15

oh oops, @QuertyGirl
you just said that.
some of us are dim, myself included Wink

RedDirtWildChild · 08/04/2023 19:18

QuertyGirl · 08/04/2023 19:13

@RedDirtWildChild

This was in real life.

It's a mixture of jealousy and snobbery (I have a strong, regional accent)

Why would you care though? And that’s not really relevant to online anyway.

Nimbostratus100 · 08/04/2023 19:23

Hotcrossed · 08/04/2023 19:10

and you can change your name on each thread, i have just discovered,
which is Marvellous Wink

|I agree, changing name easily shakes off the wierdos

RedDirtWildChild · 08/04/2023 19:25

Nimbostratus100 · 08/04/2023 19:23

|I agree, changing name easily shakes off the wierdos

Show quote history

It also means people get less attention which I think is a big reason as to why some people post.

Morningcoffeeview · 08/04/2023 19:28

hattie43 · 08/04/2023 08:54

Don't know about stalkers but the ones I think really creepy are those who trawl through a posters back threads trying to get more ammunition for their argument. I mean really who could be bothered . Some people are just too invested .

Yup. Someone did this to me last night on a post about Easter eggs. Totally bizarre.

Teatime55 · 08/04/2023 19:31

I posted about something once and someone found anomalies in information I had given previously so this meant I was a troll blah blah.

The worst thing on here is people who don’t believe everyone’s experiences aren’t the same.
For instance I complained how hard it is to get from my town to another town nearby, you have to in and out of 2 different town centres (which takes hours) to get a bus going in that direction. If you drive it, it takes a few minutes. The number of posters who couldn’t believe it and said I was lying. I imagine they live in cities with well thought out transport systems. Not random northern towns where the buses go all over the shop for miles and miles.

Morningcoffeeview · 08/04/2023 19:40

Teatime55 · 08/04/2023 19:31

I posted about something once and someone found anomalies in information I had given previously so this meant I was a troll blah blah.

The worst thing on here is people who don’t believe everyone’s experiences aren’t the same.
For instance I complained how hard it is to get from my town to another town nearby, you have to in and out of 2 different town centres (which takes hours) to get a bus going in that direction. If you drive it, it takes a few minutes. The number of posters who couldn’t believe it and said I was lying. I imagine they live in cities with well thought out transport systems. Not random northern towns where the buses go all over the shop for miles and miles.

This was like when I had a car crash and they asked if i could use public transport to get the kids to nursery 6mi away. Well yes, but the trip would take 3 hours door to door… and including a 30 min walk to the bus stop on roads without pavements….

knittingaddict · 08/04/2023 20:24

Butitsnotfunnyisititsserious · 08/04/2023 18:49

It's a position many should take.

Show quote history

I certainly do.

Sittogether · 08/04/2023 20:26

I had a bunch of people get obsessed with an irrelevant detail in a thread I once posted. It’s not an uncommon situation but nearly every time someone posts about it now they are accused of being me.