I’m watching an affair unfold in front of me.

[AnyoneElse1982]

I don’t usually notice this stuff. I won’t be saying a word to anyone. But I can see an affair going on. It’s a neighbour of mine.

I’m seeing him with the OW more and more. She’s a friend of a friend (hence I notice her) very attractive. I’ve just seen them in the coffee shop together now.

I feel sad for my lady neighbour. I can see that even if something hasn’t actually happened (because how would I know) her H sees this OW is a lot, I see them together most days now, neighbour is a teacher. I do an early school run so see her leave. Each morning I see her H and OW walking together when I get back. It’s entirely coincidental my timings match.

I won’t say a word, but I can see it in front of me, body language has changed over time between them.

im only putting it here because I won’t be saying a word as I can’t know for sure. But I strongly suspect. It’s not something that would bother me, just I’m seeing it out of no choice of mine unfold in front of me.

I would imagine it's quite sad to see it playing out right before your eyes, and having to hold back on letting his wife know. 😔 But you did the right thing. Shit happens.. Such a shame for their spouses and kiddos. 😢 Thanks for the update though.

I'd feel bothered by this too OP. Because I've been that wife and among the last to know and had a whole host of people being complicit.

In this case though I wouldn't get involved as you aren't friends or family. They are brazen fuckers. Hopefully they'll get caught out soon.

It’s all out @Morewineplease10
@DollyPartonsLeftTit very very sad. Young kids and I just hope it works out ok.

So sorry @Morewineplease10

I think this post hit the nail on the head, for all my noticing. They actually could not have started this in the first place. Now it’s out our mutual friend has said she (as in OW) has been unhappy for a while (married young etc) and she believes this guy my neighbour happened to be the one OW has developed a bond with, she said he needs to be looking over his shoulder as he is just a way out. It’s terrible like absolutely fucking terrible, in someways I was hoping that what PPs on here said was true. That I was just being a curtain twitcher.

Actually I still remember this post and I'm sad to see that it was actually an affair :(

I don't think that you could have prevented it. If they wanted to do it, they were going to do it. And for them not to, only because someone is watching is not the sign of a strong relationship with good morals :(

That's a very sad ending.

The poor wife.

Maybe this will make you and her closer?

I’m not close to the neighbour’s wife but we smile and say hello. I’m actually good friends with her elderly neighbour having supported that neighbour when she lost her husband. And I know she’s close to her neighbour so hoping there is support there and her family of course.

it’s the kids I feel for, he’s moved into a flat it seems (nearby) as I’ve seen him cycle up.

My brother once deduced his neighbour was having an affair when he saw the man in town on his phone walking home from work. Said it was just something about his expression that made him think that he was talking to someone he was in love with. SIL scoffed and didn't believe it for a second. 6 months later it all came out and also the fact that the man used to ring his OW on his walk to the station every day.

My other SILs friend's husband was grassed up by a neighbour. He worked from home, friend commuted to her job so several times a week during the day the OW would visit him and never when friend was home. So after a few months, the neighbour grassed him up and wife chucked him out.

You can tell a lot from body language.

They all should have kept their beaks out.

Talk about making it all about you!

I would tell your friend and get them to have a word with OW. It might not have progressed yet, so letting them know that it's been noticed and that they are playing with fire might deter them.

Huh @WomanStanleyWoman2 you seem to want to find an opportunity to jump down my throat quite a lot!

@Theokaycokey its progressed, he’s moved out.

There wouldn’t be an opportunity if you just kept your nose out of their business…

They're not wrong though are they? You've been inserting yourself into their business for months, signalling your virtue all over the place. Its odd to be so invested in strangers relationships.

Thanks for the update, OP. I've occasionally wondered if things had developed - fwiw, I trusted your observational powers and think some PPs must have really bad social skills!

@GalileoHumpkins it’s not inserting, I don’t quite understand.

Don't you? You're posting about somebody else's life here. Whatever they're doing doesn't affect you in the slightest but posting here encourages all the other nosey parkers to 'celebrate' their so-called intuition and superior observational skills.

Whatever the faults of the couple having an affair, your nosey and attention-seeking behaviour isn't anything I'd want as a character.

Noticing stuff isn’t being nosey. We live on a small island full of people so we can’t help but observe their behaviour. This is a chat forum. It’s actually called “chat”. Where people chat about stuff. OP was thinking out loud, as she was witnessing something that was sad. If you’re not interested, why are you reading it?

Asks the nosey person trying to police who should post on a thread. It's none of your business why I read or posted.

Ooh stroppy!!

@LyingWitchInTheWardrobe but you wanted to read it and judge. You probably took some gratification? Ask yourself deep down too what your intentions were re: your comments to me?

This is a chat, I’m taking no joy from this. My grandfather had numerous affairs and I saw the impact of those on my father and siblings. This is no joke. In a way I’ve found this thread a place to discuss what’s going on and I wasn’t expected judgement. Of course this is a sad time for my neighbour and her children.