I’m watching an affair unfold in front of me.

[AnyoneElse1982]

I don’t usually notice this stuff. I won’t be saying a word to anyone. But I can see an affair going on. It’s a neighbour of mine.

I’m seeing him with the OW more and more. She’s a friend of a friend (hence I notice her) very attractive. I’ve just seen them in the coffee shop together now.

I feel sad for my lady neighbour. I can see that even if something hasn’t actually happened (because how would I know) her H sees this OW is a lot, I see them together most days now, neighbour is a teacher. I do an early school run so see her leave. Each morning I see her H and OW walking together when I get back. It’s entirely coincidental my timings match.

I won’t say a word, but I can see it in front of me, body language has changed over time between them.

im only putting it here because I won’t be saying a word as I can’t know for sure. But I strongly suspect. It’s not something that would bother me, just I’m seeing it out of no choice of mine unfold in front of me.

I find that all the “ mind your own business “ types are the ones who shout loudest when they WANT others to get involved .

“ I can’t believe that my ex doesn’t see his kids / pay child support and all his friends and family know but they don’t say anything “

“ I can’t believe that all the other kids and their parents knew that my son was getting bullied at school but no one told me”.

” My boss bullies me in front of the whole office but no one sticks up for me”.

Gossip

This is literally stuff you made up.

I can see why you'd be curious to know what is going on OP.
But, in reality, you haven't seen any clear evidence of an affair at all.
I wouldn't tell anything to the wife unless she was a close friend. Telling her wouldn't achieve anything at all. It's their problem. if there is s problem to be had.
And why does your friend need to know the name of your neighbour exactly? She could have just said what she saw to you as a bit of a gossip, without the need to know the name.

😂

You and the OP both need to get a life.

Well I've been riveted (genuinely) by all this. Sad for the wife and children though.

Hello soz pilates and work got in the way! And finally the sun is out here.

No plot twists, not a huge amount to add. Evidence is they’ve been close up to each other, caught out touching each other near the park. My friend didn’t want to spread gossip. She was probably doing her own investigating.

Not the OW, the cheated on wife is lovely. But she’s not as striking physically as OW.

This is the sort of stuff that goes on all over I’m sure of it, read it on here. This one I’m sure will come up soon and come out in the wash. I trust my intuition. I trust what I’ve seen and what my friend has seen. Sad.

I can't understand why u haven't told her, she's going to be destroyed.

Give her a fb or linked in msg anonymous and tell her so she can at least prepare herself

Because she’s not my friend, she’s a neighbour. I don’t think it’s quite sunk in, although my friend is reeling and said what should we do? We thought about setting up a fake LinkedIn account and messaging the man and saying you’ve been spotted.

Jfc. To what purpose? To satisfy whom?

If you really are going to start interfering, at least have the decency to show your face rather than harassing near-strangers anonymously.

Oh I agree wholeheartedly but alas, here I am. In fact, here we all are, posting on an anonymous internet forum for mums. We probably all need to get a life 😅

It makes no sense either. The ones advocating to mind your own business likely aren't the ones who would be interested in blethering on sharing their business with nosey randoms.

The 'good bit of tea' (gossip) makes me cringe. This is somebody's life, not the OP's (the gossip bringer) but why do affairs and talk about them make so many women so happy? Utterly creepy, and that's putting it mildly.

OP, you're just loving your own interpretation of someone else's drama, aren't you? Do make sure you report back on every little detail, no matter how very insignificant it is.

"We thought about setting up a fake LinkedIn account and messaging the man and saying you’ve been spotted."

Says the woman who has repeatedly said she does not intend to say anything.

"This one I’m sure will come up soon and come out in the wash. I trust my intuition. I trust what I’ve seen and what my friend has seen. Sad."

Schadenfreude? Your investment in what you think you have witnessed is really quite disturbing.

It’s not really disturbing unless I’ve got this wrong. I can clearly see someone is having an affair. So has at least one other. Neither of us is relishing in another’s misfortune. This is an anonymous forum.

why are people attacking me? Had you noticed this would you not wonder what the hell they are up to? Would you not feel a sense of injustice and sadness for the wife, kids and other husband?

I am not one to thrive on other’s misery in fact the opposite.

"Had you noticed this would you not wonder what the hell they are up to?"

I would consider it none of my business.

It’s not really disturbing unless I’ve got this wrong.

No, even if you're right it's still intrusive, creepy and stalkerish. It's not dependent on the strength of your sleuthing skills. It's none of your business either way.

An anonymous LinkedIn account to try to frighten him? Seriously?

You did what? Ffs, just mind your own business.

Had you noticed this would you not wonder what the hell they are up to? Would you not feel a sense of injustice and sadness for the wife, kids and other husband?

You share a postcode with these people, not DNA. I might think “I reckon they’re at it”, but then I’d get on with my own life. I certainly wouldn’t be providing a running commentary on a forum, anonymous or otherwise - and setting up a fake LinkedIn profile is just deranged.

Close your curtains OP and put the telly on. And mind your own business rather than someone else's. You'd better not be my neighbour, if you are, we're going to fall out.

Aaaallll of this

But you're the one on here, crowing about it with glee. Whether they're having an affair or not is completely irrelevant; it has nothing to do with you or any of us.

What is your end game, here? Were you expecting people to encourage you in to confronting this nefarious pair, full of ire and righteous indignation?

Is your life really so easy that you can afford to devote so much headspace to something so utterly irrelevant to you and everyone except those who are directly involved? If so, I envy you.

No end game, I have not set up a LI account. Just a bit of sleuthing. No stalking.

people jump to some mad conclusions.

plus I’m not sure what you get from attacking me. If you find the thread, what’s going on so offensive just block it.

all I’m saying is I’ve noticed these people are having an affair, I’ve said so on an anon forum. Plenty of people are engaging.

What makes you think I’m gleeful? My observations? Why are those gleeful? I think it’s pretty crass of you to make a call on my entire life based on these observations. I mean people post on MN for a number of reasons. This is hardly out of this world. Ffs people post about their spots!

Attacking you? How have I attacked you? Good grief, if you consider my words to be 'attacking' I think you may have sensitivity issues!

How did you think people would respond? This is a public forum; you have the right to post and we have the right to respond. That's how this works.

If you didn't want to be called out on your behaviour, then perhaps you shouldn't have commented at all.