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Quick Poll of MNers around domestic abuse - No details needed

304 replies

WoodforTrees · 09/02/2023 18:45

A quick poll.

On the back of one of the threads about Emma Pattison who was murdered this week along with her daughter, it has become apparent just how many women relate to life she may have been living. We know the figures around reported domestic abuse, and some of the charities like Women's Aid will have a guess at unreported figures, but I think the numbers are higher than even the worst guess.

I never reported. I even insisted everything was 'fine' when someone reported on my behalf. I know there are more like me.

There is a good definition of domestic abuse here. It breaks down the types and gives examples for anyone who is unclear:

thefirststep.org.uk/wp-content/uploads/2015/04/Types-of-abuse-and-examples.pdf

Please feel free to name-change and simply write 'Yes' or 'No' to indicate whether you have ever experienced any form of DA. Please please don't think this poll isn't for you if you never have. I'm hoping to see lots of 'No' answers.

Thank you.

OP posts:
SchoolTripDrama · 09/02/2023 19:20

Yes (as a child)

SchoolTripDrama · 09/02/2023 19:21

WoodforTrees · 09/02/2023 18:54

There isn't a clickable poll. It's just a 'Yes' or 'No' - that IS the poll.

The point is that I believe the number of women who have experienced DA is far higher than current estimates, and thought a percentage overview would give a small snapshot. It will also be useful to share with all the abuser apologists who are trying to suggest that Emma Pattison may be in some way responsible for what happened.

There needs to be a sea of change, and perhaps by realising how many MNers have been victims of DA - just via one thread - more people will wake up to just how endemic this problem is, and feel more inclined to get behind those trying to drive change.

As a former victim - Thank you

MontanaSapphire · 09/02/2023 19:21

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

Yirk · 09/02/2023 19:22

Yes

SchoolTripDrama · 09/02/2023 19:22

mmi · 09/02/2023 19:09

Reported. Was disbelieved. Three times. Laughed at. By the police.

Left in the end.

Still don't think I would've been believed. I wouldn't be believed on here if I spelled it out.

🖤Flowers

Eas1lyd1stracted · 09/02/2023 19:23

So I said yes before. To expand:

  • Childhood of domestic abuse. Don't think Mum ever reported. Me and my sister did with limited or no consequences.
-As an adult when I was younger yes and didn't report. -Now professionally meet loads of victims of domestic abuse. Very few victims report.
FourAndTwentyBlackbirdsBakedInAPie · 09/02/2023 19:24

mmi · 09/02/2023 19:09

Reported. Was disbelieved. Three times. Laughed at. By the police.

Left in the end.

Still don't think I would've been believed. I wouldn't be believed on here if I spelled it out.

I believe you.

Regalhen · 09/02/2023 19:24

Yes

TheABC · 09/02/2023 19:25

No.

DRS1970 · 09/02/2023 19:26

No

LoveMAFS · 09/02/2023 19:26

yes

LoveMAFS · 09/02/2023 19:27

I've done a Claire's law twice and found both men had previous.

larchforest · 09/02/2023 19:27

Many years ago, when married to exH, yes.

Goodread1 · 09/02/2023 19:27

Yes I did report my experience and have completed freedom programme too,

Experienced psychological /emotional abuse mostly

Plus sexual abuse too

mmi · 09/02/2023 19:27

Thank you @FourAndTwentyBlackbirdsBakedInAPie

It doesn't matter so much to me now - it was long ago and a galaxy far away and a different me, I'm not that person any more - but it's easy to sit back and not realise that if you're disadvantaged in other ways, you'll be targeted and just not believed when you report it. Because troubled kid bad family and all that.

ladymacbeth · 09/02/2023 19:27

No

gamerchick · 09/02/2023 19:28

Yes

NewKittenSlave · 09/02/2023 19:28

No.

Underadandelion · 09/02/2023 19:29

Yes

Myonlydesire · 09/02/2023 19:29

No

FenghuangHoyan · 09/02/2023 19:29

Yes

Giggorata · 09/02/2023 19:29

yes

Sistanotcista · 09/02/2023 19:30

Yes

anythinginapinch · 09/02/2023 19:31

No

FortyFacedFuckers · 09/02/2023 19:33

Yes

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