Rightmove Gem.

[PriamFarrl]

Crazy description ✔️
Detailed picture of every toilet ✔️
Pictures of random trees ✔️
Pictures of a dog ✔️
Pictures of the actual house ❎

www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/129160883#/?channel=RES_BUY

Well if you lived on the road you would say "they" instead of "it"

Incase

If you type the number plate into the MOT checker, it comes up as expired a couple of years ago, so maybe it's been scrapped or is stored somewhere for now.

www.check-mot.service.gov.uk/results?registration=r812xkp

I have a bit of a fascination with looking at the details for very old cars I see on the road, which I realise is extremely dull and akin to trainspotting.

I don't keep a notebook or anything, but I like it when I see an old car with very low mileage, such as the old style Mini, that had only done around 500 miles a year for the last couple of decades, so it was chance to actually see it out on the road. Or one that has done 200k+ miles and is still going, stuff like that.

Incase you want the spiritual experience yourself www.booking.com/hotel/gb/61-arbutus-drive.en-gb.html?aid=1610684&label=bristol-oJkZc1F15dVIuITThQeESgSM379698508775%3Apl%3Ata%3Ap1%3Ap2%3Aac%3Aap%3Aneg%3Afi%3Atikwd-493581822432%3Alp1006586%3Ali%3Adem%3Adm%3Appccp%3DUmFuZG9tSVYkc2RlIyh9YfqnDqqG8nt10AsofPfvtt0&sid=63add3fc7a8605f828fc31a43cc7e610&all_sr_blocks=419135902_309260591_2_0_0;checkin=2022-11-28;checkout=2022-11-29;dest_id=-2590919;dest_type=city;dist=0;group_adults=2;group_children=0;hapos=24;highlighted_blocks=419135902_309260591_2_0_0;hpos=4;matching_block_id=419135902_309260591_2_0_0;nflt=ht_id%3D201;no_rooms=1;req_adults=2;req_children=0;room1=A%2CA;sb_price_type=total;sr_order=popularity;sr_pri_blocks=419135902_309260591_2_0_0__54230;srepoch=1669629034;srpvid=6d7145341f940271;type=total;ucfs=1&

😬

🤣🤣🤣🤣

They won’t sell it. They just want everyone to look at it and marvel.

but god it’s gross.

I think the person who created it either has some MH problems (I'm armchair diagnosing mostly the grandiose description so feel free to ignore!) or a highly deprived background (it's like a child has imagined a 'posh house / hotel' in bits & pieces & tried to cram them all into 'where I will live when I grow up': a mess)

Yup. The vendor has clearly insisted on submitting their own blurb, unaware how their florid prose is shooting them in the foot ...

IKR?!
Those celebrities were so overcome that when they came to write their genuine reviews, weirdly their purple prose came out sounding exactly like the vendor's own hyperbole ...

I don't think Strike are a real estate agent. I think they're like Purple Bricks or Sheep or whatever they're called. Basically companies that make their money by collecting data from househunters.

I just looked at the 1st review on the rental bit: 'it was all amazing. Matt was lovely. An insane night was had' etc etc. Now all I can 'see' is that twat Matt Handcock there, grinning insanely with his 'great love'. Perhaps HE will buy it?

that dark wood is claustrophobic

The floor plans hurt my brain!

That is 100% grim - I would be suicidal if I had to live there - so dark and depressing. Just dreadful.

I can’t work out the numbering.

The flat for sale is no 61, the flat that sold recently at 61a looks like it’s behind the house next door, which is in the same style? And there seems to be at least 4 flats listed at 61a?

media.onthemarket.com/properties/8637222/1322665533/document-0.pdf

Gosh, this has been such a great start to a Monday morning. Sooooo awful and what a nightmare vendor. I'm loosely familiar with this part of Bristol, and this house/flat/whatever the f it is is so not in keeping with the boring, suburban vibe of the area. If it was in Clifton, I could see that it might have some appeal to someone bougie with bad taste and a lot of money, but all the other houses on that road are worth £500k max.

Surely you'd need to sink another could of hundred grand to make the layout normal and the decor not give you a pounding headache. All the wood reminded me of a boat.

*couple of hundred grand

Shame that 2022 is almost over, really. It'll all be very passé soon.

Only clicked on link to see the dog. Not disappointed!

House was nice too.

These are normally a bit shit, but thank you for this one OP.

I couldn't even make it through the fucking description. 😂

The doggo is the star of the show.

I saw this on Twitter. The excruciating guff is to disguise the fact it’s actually a poxy little house on a not very nice road.

Thanks to the poster who linked the planning documents - I now think that it was one property - number 61, split into 61 and 61a, 61a is a newly constructed building with 4 flats and a back garden bungalow and this one with 2 flats. Number 61 was sold in 2012 for £302,000 - excluding the second part of this property where we think the developer lives, if he sells this at asking, he has netted £2.7M so even taking account of the marble and German Craftsman ... he as not done badly out of it..

The description is weirdly aggressive. They may have just as well written " if you dont love our weirdly claustrophobic colour scheme (approved by colour experts no less) you are an ignorant pleb."

So a 1 bed then yeah? How can a garage be an "optional" bedroom? Has it been converted to a living space or not? Maybe we're all missing a trick & everyone with a 3 bed should list it as a 4 if they've got a garage.

Also, vaults?