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Rightmove Gem.

517 replies

PriamFarrl · 27/11/2022 23:17

Crazy description ✔️
Detailed picture of every toilet ✔️
Pictures of random trees ✔️
Pictures of a dog ✔️
Pictures of the actual house ❎

www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/129160883#/?channel=RES_BUY

OP posts:
Thread gallery
9
Spudlet · 28/11/2022 09:25

What in the name of god have I just looked at…? I was feeling a bit off-colour before, those camera angles have made me feel quite dizzy! 😳😂

Cute dog though, do you think they’re throwing him/her in?

Zogthebiggestdragon · 28/11/2022 09:27

That has just been an amazing trip for my Monday morning, thank you so much for posting it and for all the comments. Brightened my day! WHY SO MUCH HIDEOUS GREEN WHY?

starfishmummy · 28/11/2022 09:29

Owners description This is one of Bristol’s most crafted homes of recent times

My description "This is one of the world's Bristols most batshit home of recent times"

coffeeandbiscuit · 28/11/2022 09:29

This has made my morning.

BlackKittyMama · 28/11/2022 09:29

I couldn’t read that whole description, it gave me a headache after the first few sentences 🥴

JustHereWithMyPopcorn · 28/11/2022 09:29

Those photos hurt my eyes, so out of focus and glary - let alone the colours. That house is a migraine. I imagine that the vendor is also a migraine.

kingtamponthefurred · 28/11/2022 09:31

SavouryFlavour · 28/11/2022 09:04

Also, why the shot of the tiny study with two desktop screens but one main office chair, then the two small desks with chairs next to it? Either the owner is an international crime overlord who furnishes the business side of his lair from IKEA, or Austin Powers is homeschooling his kids.

😂😂

curlymom · 28/11/2022 09:31

Love the dog 😂

user1471538283 · 28/11/2022 09:31

So it's a house? The descriptor says it's a 2 bedroom flat with 3 bathrooms. He has said it is up to 4 bedrooms? And he has left the bins out? Does he own the one next door as well? I cannot imagine many celebs wanting to rent out a house/flat in the suburbs of Bristol when they could rent a proper penthouse in town.

I bet he is thinking "yep, job well done. This will be sold in no time".

I wrote my own blurb when I sold my last house. With all the important details but maybe I missed a trick and should have explained how I sourced original doors?

kingtamponthefurred · 28/11/2022 09:33

VacancyAtNumber10AGAIN · 28/11/2022 09:03

I’m too invested in this house
I’ve found the owner 🤦‍♀️ hes a property developer and judging by the address on companies house it’s him that lives in the ground floor flat

As if anyone needed another Unique Non-Selling Point

FelizNavicrab · 28/11/2022 09:34

WHY SO MUCH HIDEOUS GREEN WHY?

I'll have you know that everyone, includng psychologists, agree this THE colour for 2022 Grin

Littlepiggiesinblankets · 28/11/2022 09:35

" A pulchritudinous, grandiose detailed property ..."

Yeah, it's not the property that has grandiosity issues, mate ...

User45899 · 28/11/2022 09:36

ZeroFuchsGiven · 28/11/2022 09:24

www.ebay.co.uk/itm/401730194746

You're Welcome. Enjoy! Grin

Oh wow!!! 😳

Thank you.

WakingUpDistress · 28/11/2022 09:36

I love the photo of the thermostat!!

diddl · 28/11/2022 09:36

I barely made it past the first pic as it looks as if it's looking down onto home grown weed!

Does it share an entrance with the current owners?

Regularsizedrudy · 28/11/2022 09:38

It’s like being trapped in a box of after eight mints

lightlypoached · 28/11/2022 09:38

Brilliant.

ShakeYourFeathers · 28/11/2022 09:38

Has anyone googled the car reg to see if that throws up anything

TheYearOfSmallThings · 28/11/2022 09:39

Either the owner is an international crime overlord who furnishes the business side of his lair from IKEA, or Austin Powers is homeschooling his kids.

Grin Genius.

getalifesonny · 28/11/2022 09:40

I saw a house. Pic 68. Ans yes I went through all of them as I was curious. Love the wood, not the stone in the bathroom or the frog green kitchen cabinets. The owner has quite an eclectic taste.

Neverplayleapfrogwithmrpipes · 28/11/2022 09:42

Farrow and BALLS!

ShakeYourFeathers · 28/11/2022 09:43

ShakeYourFeathers · 28/11/2022 09:38

Has anyone googled the car reg to see if that throws up anything

The gov.Uk website doesn't recognise the number plate

JoanThursday · 28/11/2022 09:46

TugboatAnnie · 28/11/2022 09:10

Me too! Also the garden building turned into a bungalow (61a Arbutus Road) with the same hideous green colour. How that got planning permission! I think access is between the two houses on the road. I wondered if the owner lived there or whether that's where they did the massages advertised on booking.com!

I see the bungalow is green too! Article in the local newspaper

Maerchentante · 28/11/2022 09:46

If anyone walks into my office now, they'll ask why I've got tears streaming down my face.
I've not laughed this hard in months. Thanks all.

That house/flat is something else. Not sure what drugs the owner is on, but I certainly won't want any of those.
The blue bedroom looks like a cheap, dodgy hotel room. Seems to have a skylight, would that classify as a window?

Gave up half way through the blurb, way too much waffle.

ChateauMargaux · 28/11/2022 09:46

Thanks for the suggestion to look at street view - it's a street of ordinary 1930's houses, some of which have been extended in various, fairly conventional ways, with the exception of this one and it's similarly extended next door neighbour.

It's a one bedroom apartment with three bathrooms - the blue bedroom is either a CGI impression of what it could look like or it's a picture of what the same thing looks like in the house next door. The pictures of the bed on the mezzanine are unlikely to pass building regulations - fire doors, roof height, and therefore I can't see how it could be classified as a bedroom....

The use of Jack and Jill goes against convention as this usually refers to a single bathroom with two entrances, usually shared between 2 bedrooms. In some cases in the text, I think he means (yes I am assuming his gender), his and her's (again genders assumed)

The house is not built around the tree - they had to 'work around it' not 'build around it'.

However... further wasting time on the internet made me look closer at next door's garden - clearly the 'more is more' concept applied there too... I think this one bedroom bungalow is at the bottom...
www.bristolpost.co.uk/news/bristol-news/lime-green-home-hot-tub-4328670

It would be interesting to know what the 'the long planning history associated with the site and the level of public interest that has been generated over recent years, including from the local ward councillors.'

Did they snap up 2 pretty average 1930's detached houses - turn one into 4 flats selling for a total of £1.6M in 2018.. nethouseprices.com/house-prices/bs92pw plus the garden bungalow and the second one into two or more flats..

If this is all true... then the average buyer is clearly just not inventive enough in terms of what can be done to houses to increase their value, get round planning restrictions and get buyers to pay inflated prices based on unique fixtures.... . we are underestimating this person's genius.