Is your life still shit? I can solve all your problems....forever.

[pineapplebryanbrown]

I'm a non medically trained self appointed internet nurse. As I am unfettered by knowledge or training I can help you to solve every problem you have. Step inside my lovely advice clinic which is staffed by myself and my team of kindly Agony Aunts.

I’m still brooding. Tomorrow’s fresh hell is entertaining overseas visitors. Why in the name of fuck am I still doing this job?

To be fair, they don’t normally let me be in front of outsiders, because ... well, you know.

Snax have arrived and all is well again. He returned with bacon fries instead of rancheros which is an insult, but atleast I have my chocolate 😍

I love bacon fries, I’ll have them!

Did you have to give the blow job up front?

Pretty I like them too, but their no ranchero! Especially considering their golden wonder bacon fries.

Project, can you just pop them in a circular bus route? Easier to sell if it’s a red double decker. It’s their chance to see real British culture.

And scenery

lido no payment has not yet been exchanged. Tryna figure out how to wriggle my way out. Might just fall asleep.

You can just express massive shock and hurt feelings that he thought you would prostitute yourself.

He’s not a good negotiator but I still think it’s wise to avoid marriage.

If they are German, arrange a screening of Mr Bean. German’s love Mr Bean.

Not my apostrophe

lido he'd probably just laugh at that. This isn't the first time I've prostituted for snax.

Do I have to get on the bus with them? London buses can be pretty shady, not sure I really want to take the risk.

So maybe just load up an iPad with mr bean, pop them on a bus to Tottenham and if they make it back alive then bravo, we can have drinks in the pub after.

Project you are real pal to save a bucket of pubes for me.

Thigh guessed correctly, it was a cigar-related incident. I was doing my bit during the blackout and before you could say "Put that light out" I was all smouldering , and not just with lust!

Oh such larks we had in those days! We had a lot of Spam and community singing. It's why I voted for Brexit, really. Well that and Nigel Farage's lovely teeth.

No, you definitely don’t get on the bus. You get on the circle line and have a lovely nap.

Are a real pal

wolf just fake amnesia.

Lone crunch down really hard on the bacon fries, really attack them with your teeth, then explain to your dp that you are only sucking them gently, he should see what you can do if you really meant business...

Any time Pooter

What’s German for ‘I’d like to harvest your organs’?

If brexit happens can we turn Farage into spam? I feel he needs to do his bit.

projectJust shout really loudly!

I certainly have plans for him ;-)

pooter dog shit why didnt I check the thread sooner! Payment has been made in full. I have no regrets. I will do anything for snax after all.

Oh God, my body was taken over by aliens today... I can think of no other explanation as to why I defrosted and cleaned the freezer... am now lying down and will never get up again