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Original poster

Is your life still shit? I can solve all your problems....forever.

999 replies

pineapplebryanbrown · 03/04/2019 21:48

I'm a non medically trained self appointed internet nurse. As I am unfettered by knowledge or training I can help you to solve every problem you have. Step inside my lovely advice clinic which is staffed by myself and my team of kindly Agony Aunts.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
30
Gettingnowhere · 05/04/2019 23:03

I think that's how I ended up getting sexed going down a chute

Gettingnowhere · 05/04/2019 23:04

Ooh, I forgot! I was going to put out another call for baby name suggestions. Has she had it yet?

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 05/04/2019 23:04

Myfanwy Slanket Merkin Kitten.

Unisex.

OP posts:
Gettingnowhere · 05/04/2019 23:07

Camilla Myfanwy Slanket Merkin Kitten for a girl

ProjectGainsborough · 05/04/2019 23:07

Stalin or Adolf would work nicely

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 05/04/2019 23:08

Later this month, has she porked up yet?

OP posts:
Gettingnowhere · 05/04/2019 23:08

Project have you and Thigh been having pillow talk again?

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 05/04/2019 23:09

Stalin Adolf Camilla Myfanwy Slanket Merkin Kitten

OP posts:
Gettingnowhere · 05/04/2019 23:09

Harry porked up, Thigh. That's how the baby was made

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 05/04/2019 23:11

Did Harry chuck his sausage up her slanket?

Can't trust a preggo who doesn't double in size at the end and become a zorb.

ZOG!!!! After King Zog of Albania.

OP posts:
Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 05/04/2019 23:13

I could really do with a sausage roll and some twiglets.

OP posts:
ProjectGainsborough · 05/04/2019 23:14

Have we already had Stalin and adolf? I feel like I’m missing out from all those pages I skimmed.

I thought zog was a medically trained dragon?

ProjectGainsborough · 05/04/2019 23:15

I’d send the dark lord but the selfish bastard has gone to sleep

Gettingnowhere · 05/04/2019 23:19

Princess Pearl and Sir Gettabout were medically trained. Zog was just the transport

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 05/04/2019 23:19

King Zog of Albania.

Stalin Adolf Zog Slanket

We add Kitten on the end if a girl.

OP posts:
Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 05/04/2019 23:20

Project jingle your keys, he'll spring into action.

OP posts:
Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 05/04/2019 23:21

I miss Dangly the filthy whore.

OP posts:
ProjectGainsborough · 05/04/2019 23:26

Did zog never get to be a doctor? That is so species-ist. I should have thought the ability to sterilise things on the spot by breathing fire on them and sharp claws would be a plus.

If Harry and Meghan don’t at least put Adolf or Slanket in there I’m becoming a republican.

MidnightBlue28 · 05/04/2019 23:27

What’s that old joke... “I like kids but I couldn’t eat a whole one!”

🧛‍♀️🧛‍♀️🧛‍♀️

LosingOxygen · 05/04/2019 23:37

Ok "fuck fuck egg" bought, OH upgraded to Fuckboy and problem solved! Now I can get on with napping and eating cake tomorrow, all the important stuff. Alas I have no slanket but I have 2 blankets and a dressing gown at the moment, and I don't plan on getting dressed tomorrow or move very far from the sofa. Any suggestions on things I can do without leaving the house?

LosingOxygen · 05/04/2019 23:45

Ok one more. Can you put me off children please? They are proving damn near impossible to make. Sad

LosingOxygen · 05/04/2019 23:50

I should add we can't do it the fun way!

MidnightBlue28 · 06/04/2019 00:45

Losing being serious for a moment, I’m so sorry to hear that. I had to accept that I was never going to have them, and it’s hard, I wish I could say it wasn’t. Flowers

hellenbackage · 06/04/2019 00:58

Ok I'm a detective but I keep
Losing you lot and work and rl keeps getting in the bloody way.

So a quick wave at every one ✋

And back to rl.

LosingOxygen · 06/04/2019 02:10

Sorry to hear that midnight 💐