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Original poster

Is Your Life Shit? I can solve all your problems

999 replies

pineapplebryanbrown · 01/04/2019 19:07

I am a kindly non medically trained self appointed internet nurse. I am unfettered by knowledge or training and I run a lovely advice clinic. Please bring me your problems and I will solve them, forever.

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Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 03/04/2019 08:09

There's something about pineapples being lots of fruits stuck together or something? It's a TRA! So are we!

Oh pineapple we're friends not foes, nobody transes like we do. We're not PERFs like the rest of MN, we're PERVs.

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Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 03/04/2019 08:11

Fuck me, I've got a house moving / buying ad that says - we'd love to move in for summer.

No guests!

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DanglyTassles · 03/04/2019 08:12

pineapple !!! Hurrah!!

We missed you so much!!

Please let us solve a problem for you and then you can solve ours of having no friends by being our friend!!!

Oh I love me cute little chunk I do! You remind me of an angry little cherry barb that goes round my fish tank biting others' tails! Such a character!!

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 03/04/2019 08:12

Where is everyone? It's not fun by my lone.

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DanglyTassles · 03/04/2019 08:15

thigh pineapple has told you you have no friends don't forget, so that is definitely true because she deeply considers everything she says!

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 03/04/2019 08:15

DT how is Triangle the Angel 😇 fish? Did he survive @luaa giving him a licking?

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Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 03/04/2019 08:16

DT didn't bother Pol Pot, doesn't bother me.

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DanglyTassles · 03/04/2019 08:18

Yes!! Triangle is a survivor! He's a warrior fish you see! He quite liked it in any case!

Where is @Luaa btw?

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 03/04/2019 08:18

DT what did we do before Thighland? It's not even 2 months but we've aged so very much, whilst immaturing at the same time.

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Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 03/04/2019 08:21

Luaa is a jogger don't forget, we forgave her for her love of animals though. She'd be gay for my zoo freedom mission.

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Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 03/04/2019 08:22

I mean we forgave her due to her love of animals.

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DanglyTassles · 03/04/2019 08:25

I know thigh reverse improvement is tremendous!!

We are older an yet feel younger for making no efforts at all!

No fucks are given and my skin is actually very smooth as is my overstretched arse!! 😊

I think M3!sounds a bit stressed but that's because she's insisting on doing work and shizz!

Throw your laptop away M3 , that's the ticket!

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 03/04/2019 08:25

DT has Thighland taken over your entire life? I hope Reg is making a mock product of BumTips that we can sell on S&B.

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DanglyTassles · 03/04/2019 08:28

Yes of course thigh I only live here now!

If I have to do any RL shizz I find a way to shirk it! It makes me happy to shirk work!

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 03/04/2019 08:29

DT my skin is smooth too! It's that old cliché, fat don't crack. That and the cheese.

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DanglyTassles · 03/04/2019 08:30

Bum tips are a definitely goer!

Everyone wants one I already know! Just like everyone wanted that knitted cock-out vicar!

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 03/04/2019 08:31

I had to do driving yesterday and look what happened, it's really not safe to step away from the nation. We're only an arse cheek away from S&B after all.

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DanglyTassles · 03/04/2019 08:33

It was very dangerous without you, at one point I thought they were going to trade make-up tips!!

One day people will realise, all they need to do is run a comb through their chin and go ... to lay on the sofa!

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 03/04/2019 08:35

DT I've got something worrying to tell you, i think we only have about 10 members of Thighland. We're aiming for about 50 million so that's a lot of recruitment still to be done. And with our laziness it's going to be tough.

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PettyLaBelle · 03/04/2019 08:35

Thigh the beauty of my job is that I will have both the supplies and the opportunity to make such a thing.

PettyLaBelle · 03/04/2019 08:38

I’ll also recruit some small children. Bring them up in the Way Of Thigh.

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 03/04/2019 08:39

Well Reg i think we need a mock up product and to start a thread on it on S&B. Then we all go on the thread and say how awesome BumTips are. I'll have to NC, we have to act serious. When can you do it? What's peak time? We'll put a clarion call for the OG to meet there at 6.30 shall we?

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Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 03/04/2019 08:51

But let's do that tomorrow when we have had a chance to discuss it tonight with Project our Prime Minister.

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Shinofsolace · 03/04/2019 08:57

Well, I'm here and I have to say I'm disappointed. I thought after I sent in MrShin-to-be to sort you all out, there would be less of this utter rubbish polluting Mumsnet. It seems you can't even listen to men, who are our superiors. You'll all end up as lonely old spinsters and I won't feel the least bit sorry for you.
As Pineapple so succinctly put it, you're not clever or funny and you have no friends

Original poster
pineapplebryanbrown · 03/04/2019 09:11

Shit you say that like it's a bad thing.

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